


Rewriting a story

by MyShipLife



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:47:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 46,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27450721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyShipLife/pseuds/MyShipLife
Summary: Alec Lightwood works with his brother and sister in their tattoo shop. One day, Magnus enters, asking for a tattoo. He meets with Isabelle first but then finds himself facing Alec, who seems to be so much more than what he lets on.Day after day, week after week, they will learn to know each other, good and bad. And we will follow them on their journey.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 133
Kudos: 151





	1. Ink

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> I've decided to try and follow (from afar) the NaNoWriMo challenge. And I've decided to give it a try with one of my favorite chapters from Flufftober: Ink.
> 
> So, this isn't technically new for those of you who already read it. I'm still working on the next chapters and just wanted to get started. I will try to keep a regular posting schedule, I don't really know for now when I'll post.
> 
> Ilene, thank you for helping me out once again <3

The buzzing sound was sending vibes through his whole body. Magnus had hesitated a long time before considering having a tattoo done. But the more he had thought about it, the more it made sense. He needed a symbol, something to show the world he was free and set on staying true to himself after living hidden for so many years.

He didn’t exactly have a very precise idea in mind, more a general knowledge of the spirit of it all.

Lightwood Ink had come highly recommended by some of his friends. Particularly Clary, but Magnus was almost certain this was due to her slight crush on her tattoo artist. To the guy’s defense, he did make a good job inking Clary’s drawings.

Magnus was caught up in his thoughts when he heard his name being called. He looked up to see a small brunette smiling at him. He stood up and went to meet her at the desk.

“Hi Magnus, I’m Izzy. I know the noise can be overwhelming when you’re not used to it. Do you want to go to a private room?”  
“No I’m good thanks.”  
“So, you’re a friend of Clary’s right?”  
“Yes, she has a few ones from Jake or something like that.”  
“Jace, yes. He’s my brother. He does mainly old school or excentric.”  
“What about you?”  
“I do mostly colors, real life nature and animals.”  
“Oh…”  
“It doesn’t sound like a nice oh… what did you have in mind?”  
“I’m not exactly sure. I kind of pictured it black and white to begin with. And probably a flower.”  
“Ok, so I’m definitely not the right person for you. Give me a minute.”

Magnus followed Izzy’s disappearing form with his eyes until she entered a room where he couldn’t see. A few minutes later, she came back to the desk, a thoughtful look on her face.

“Were you already set on an artist?”  
“Not at all. Clary told me to come to you because you’re easier to talk to – her words, not mine.”  
“That’s true, and great. We don’t advertise it much because he doesn’t want to but Alec, my other brother, also tattoos. He mostly works in the back because he specializes in cover ups, of scars mainly. But I think you’d be a great match. Would you like to meet him?”  
“Sure.”

Izzy motioned for Magnus to follow her. They arrived at the last door, where the light was less present. 

“oy, Alec. Here’s Magnus, Clary’s friend. He has a project I think you’d like. Please be nice”

Upon hearing that last sentence, Magnus got worried. Izzy left and Magnus saw a tall figure at the back of the room. The man was a giant but that wasn’t the first thing that Magnus noticed.

Instead, he noticed the large tree drawn on the man’s back, with its roots near his back dimples. The trunk was making its way upward, following the spine. And at the top, near his shoulder blades, gorgeous branches and leaves.

The drawing was spectacular, so intricate and delicate. The way it moved with the man’s back was mesmerizing.

“I thought that you’d be talking more than staring, being a friend of Clary’s and all”  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude and stare. Your tattoo is gorgeous.”  
“Thanks. So tell me more about your project.”

When the man turned around, Magnus was met with the most vibrant hazel eyes he’d ever seen. And just below his jaw line, a sinful flower adorned his neck. His stomach and arms were covered with flowers and dots, all black. Magnus was once again staring but he couldn’t stop.

“Do you need me to put on a shirt?”  
“You have really beautiful art on yourself.”  
“Thanks. Ok, Magnus right?”  
“That’s my name.”  
“I’m Alec. I don’t tattoo a lot because I need stories, and not just I-bet-a-friend-I’d-do-this story. So what’s yours?”

Magnus realized the smirk present on Alec’s face at the obvious staring disappeared when he began talking shop. And he was less distracting with a shirt on.

“Hmm ok. I’ve been looking for a way to express how I feel, and let the world know that I’m my own person, you know? I’ve dealt with my share of shitty stories and I’m done having them define who I am. I need a new start.”  
“And you think a tattoo is the answer to that?”  
“I do, it’s not just a tattoo. It’s a statement. And I want to see the reminder everyday. I need this to move forward.”

Magnus was almost shivering when he finished talking. Alec was looking at him with an assessing look. Magnus felt naked under his stare, and not the good kind of naked. After a few more minutes, Magnus saw Alec inhale and relax.

“Ok, what did you have in mind?”  
“I don’t want colors, just black and white. And I want a flower, but I don’t want something too realistic, more like an x-ray if that makes sense?”

Magnus saw Alec smirk and lift his shirt.

“You mean like this?”

On his ribcage, Alec had a delicate poppy, which looked like a perfect x-ray of the flower itself. Magnus looked at it and almost let his hand wander to it.

“Yes, exactly like that. This is precisely what I had in mind.”  
“Perfect. About the flower, do you have an idea?”  
“I was looking through pictures but they all look alike and are so common. No offense”

Magnus felt bad for saying it like that, because Alec’s clearly wasn’t one of those. To his surprise, the other man chuckled.

“None taken, and I couldn’t agree more.”  
“My mom loved flowers.”

Magnus realized he had uttered the words after they were already out. He blushed a deep red when he saw the look Alec was giving him.

“Magnus, I don’t want to pry and you can definitely say no but I feel like your mom joining the conversation out of the blue isn’t just a coincidence. Would you tell me more?”  
“My mom died when I was 8. She killed herself. My step father hated me for it and sent me away. That’s when everything changed.”  
“I’m sorry for your loss Magnus”  
“Thanks. It was a long time ago but it’s still upsetting.”  
“Understandable. And from the look of it, not so long ago… something like what, twenty years?”  
“Twenty two. I’m turning thirty in a few weeks”  
“Tell me more about your mom?”  
“She was Indonesian. Small but strong. She had me when she was just a kid herself, 16 I think. She had been raped. She met my step-father when I was 5. He brought us to the US but she never felt like herself here. It all became too much, so she ended her life.”

Magnus was then openly crying and he hated the vulnerability he was showing. Alec moved closer to him.

“Is it okay if I touch you Magnus?”

Magnus only nodded, words stuck in his throat. He felt Alec’s hands rub his upper arms, in a soothing motion. And the more he felt this man try to help him, the more pain found its way out, until Magnus was sobbing. He felt Alec’s arms tighten around him in a hugging motion, with still enough room between them making it obvious Alec was giving him the choice of closing the distance. Which Magnus did. They hugged for a moment and then Magnus let go.

“I apologize Alec, I’m sorry my emotions overwhelmed me so much.”  
“Never apologize for showing emotions Magnus. Thank you for telling me and thank you for trusting me. I have an idea for your tattoo, give me a second.”

Alec went to grab his tablet and sat next to Magnus.

“This could be great I thin.k”

Magnus watched him grab pictures and expand them on his tablet. The man had beautiful hands, bare of any ink. Magnus’ heart was thumping in his chest, because of the whirlwind of emotions in him, and because of the proximity of Alec’s body, which made him think truly inappropriate thoughts. But this wasn’t why Magnus had come here. He had come for a tattoo and he would not ruin his chance at getting one done by this man who appeared to be a terrific artist for a maybe date.

Magnus took a look at the tablet and the flower Alec had chosen. He felt the smile adorned his face before he fully realized what he was looking at.

“How did you find this?”  
“I have a lot of flower patterns. This is a Jasminum Sambac, flower from Indonesia.”  
“I remember seeing those when I was a kid. My mom loved them. You could tattoo that?”  
“Sure, I just need a size and placement.”

Magnus gave Alec the indications of what he wanted and left with an appointment the week after.

When Magnus arrived for his appointment, he was met at the door by Alec, who ushered him to his office.

“Ready?”  
“yes, nervous but yes”  
“Don’t worry, the pain is bearable but if you need to take breaks or whatever, just let me know. My whole day is booked for you.”  
“Whole day?!”  
“Relax, I’ll need three hours, max. But I don’t like to be rushed and since it’s your first time, I wanted it to be as enjoyable as possible.”  
“Such a gentleman.”  
“I try to be.”

Magnus saw the smirk on Alec’s face and the same non-pure thoughts came to mind, only it appeared that Alec might be flirting with him.

“Time to lose the shirt Magnus.”  
“What, no drinks first?”

Magnus was glad when Alec raised an eyebrow and laughed.

“No drink on the job. What we do after is another story.”

Magnus smiled, took his shirt off and sat in the chair. Alec got closer, all gloved up, and started preparing his skin. He also gave Magnus a lot of after care information.

The first puncture of the needle felt like a sharp shock.

“It’s ok Magnus. Breathe. The pain is going to dissipate soon. You haven’t told me, what do you do for a living?”  
“I’m a chef.”  
“Really? Wow! I can’t cook. Like not even pasta.”  
“Well, I could always help you with that.”  
“I’d love it. What’s your favorite dish?”

They went on talking about food. By the time Magnus realized what Alec had been doing, his tattoo was almost finished. He spent the remaining minutes observing Alec work.

Around 1pm, Magnus’ tattoo was done and cleaned. He stood up and put his shirt back on. Alec was looking at him, hesitation clear on his face. Based on their previous talk, Magnus decided to take the plunge.

“Since it’s only 1pm and we’re already done, what do you say about lunch?”  
“Depends.”

Magnus held his breath for a second.

“Are you cooking?”  
“I definitely can. My restaurant or my place?”  
“Your place?”

Magnus nodded but again he could see something in Alec’s eyes.

“I’m not expecting anything from you Alec. Don’t feel like you have to… well, we’re going to my place to share lunch, nothing more.”  
“Thanks Magnus. Not that I don’t… I mean… let’s see where this takes us first ok?”  
“Ok.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus share lunch together. We meet Alec's family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone!
> 
> I hope you're all doing well. Here is chapter 2. I am afraid it'll be difficult for me to complete the task of 50k words before Nov 30th, I'm currently around 23k written but I won't have much time in the upcoming weeks. If I happened to miss the deadline, I'd still finish this story, though I might put it on hold in December with fewer updates, since I want to do a Holiday special...
> 
> Anyway, I've tried to go for longer chapters, but I'd like your input on that. Let me know what you prefer :)
> 
> Here we go...

Magnus happened to live close to the tattoo shop so they went by foot. The walk was quiet and despite Alec usually being comfortable in silence, and the fact that Magnus didn’t seem to mind, Alec felt as if he should be trying a little more.

“How long have you lived in Brooklyn?”  
“Quite a while actually. My last foster family was in New York, still are. And I wanted to stay close to them. So all in all, I’ve been living in Brooklyn for the last fourteen years. And on my own for the last seven.”  
“You moved out barely 21 then.”  
“Yes. It felt like I had to. I loved being a part of a family, and I still see them all the time. I just wanted to explore things on my own as soon as possible. That choice had been taken away from me since the beginning so I think I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it, you know? Sorry it’s a heavy topic.”  
“It’s ok Magnus, it’s your story. We all have a past. But it makes sense to me. The need to be the responsible one, the one in charge. To prove that you can do it, not to them, but to yourself.”  
“Exactly.”

They arrived at Magnus’ apartment and Alec wasn’t surprised to see it all decorated with style. The wooden walls made the place look warm and safe. Trinkets were scattered here and there, but what struck Alec the most was the number of pictures around the room. Without really counting, he could see at least twenty. Most of them had Magnus in them, but some others were of various people. Alec recognized Clary in a few.

“Welcome to my home. I offered you lunch so I should get to it. Any allergies or food that you don’t particularly like?”  
“No, I’m good with anything.”  
“Be careful when you say that, you have no idea what I cook.”  
“Can’t be worse than what I tried in some places.”  
“Care to elaborate?”  
“Let’s just say that food some remote tribes all over the world are serving just feel different to a New Yorker. They’re not bad, just not something I could make an everyday occurrence.”  
“You’ve traveled?”  
“A lot. And tried food everywhere. What kind of food do you cook?”  
“Mainly Indonesian. I learned to cook as a professional chef so I can work with almost everything, but I wanted to get back to my roots with my cooking. It reminds me of my mother in a way.”  
“I understand that. But you don’t have to go crazy just for me. Pasta is good too.”  
“You say that like it’s a hardship. I truly enjoy cooking. Kind of like you enjoy tattooing?”  
“Point taken.”  
“Have you always worked with your siblings?”  
“No. I wasn’t often in New York when I was younger. It changed when I came back.”

Alec’s voice had taken a sharp turn. He never felt comfortable talking about his past, but it was even truer with a stranger. Because despite having been together for the last six hours, they were still strangers and Alec wasn’t ready to delve into his past.

He was already taking steps he hadn’t taken in a long while. But when Magnus entered his room, Alec had felt drawn to him. His story talked to Alec, in ways that probably most wouldn’t understand. Even if he didn’t get to hear the whole thing, he could already see himself in the same situation and that was enough to get him hooked. The fact that Magnus was utterly gorgeous also helped. Alec hadn’t been attracted to someone in so long. Since… No, better stay out of this for now. Today Alec would enjoy his lunch with this beautiful man and not let his past take over.

“So, what are you making? Can I help?”  
“You can help by sitting at the table and talk to me, while I prepare everything.”  
“I could pretend to be offended, but believe me, you don’t want me anywhere near those pots.”  
“Never say never my dear.”

Alec saw Magnus wink at him and he was glad that things were back to playful. They bantered while Magnus prepared lunch and then settled down to eat.

“Magnus this is delicious.”  
“Thanks. I’m glad you like it. It’s one of the quickest recipes I know. My mom used to make it all the time for me when I was a child.”  
“Thanks for sharing it with me.”  
“You’re welcome. So, what does Alec Lightwood do when he’s not tattooing?”  
“I don’t tattoo that much honestly, like I was telling you. I have a very specific clientele and I want it to remain that way. I’m in the shop all the time because I know it helps my siblings. I handle the administrative stuff and sometimes, unexpected clients happen.”

Alec smirked at Magnus who just smiled back at him. 

“And when I’m not in the shop, I love reading and do a lot of sports. I also enjoy a quiet evening in front of the TV. What about you?”  
“Evenings are usually busy with the restaurant, but when I’m in, I enjoy watching TV too. I only read when I’m in a bath, which is pretty often when I come to think of it. I do yoga every day. And of course I love cooking. I know it’s my job and all but it’s really more than that. I can express so much when I’m cooking. Kind of like when a writer tells a story in a way.”  
“I get it. I sketch all the time. Some ideas become tattoos. Some remain doodles. It helps me clear my mind.”  
“Funny how despite being so different, both our jobs appeal to the same thing in us. Cooking helps me relax.”

Alec smiled at that because it was indeed true. They both used their jobs as a way of feeling better. Alec had loved drawing, for as long as he could remember. But it wasn’t his first job. It came later, after everything. But being able to make one of his passions his job had been a relief. They finished eating while chatting and soon it was almost time for Alec to go. He had a family dinner that night and wanted to chat with Isabelle before.

“It was delicious Magnus, thank you.”  
“You’re welcome. I’m glad you liked it.”  
“It was very nice of you to invite me over. I feel like I need to tell you, I usually never accept invitations from clients.”  
“What made you accept mine?”  
“Like you said earlier, in a way, we are similar and I feel comfortable with you. Which, believe me, doesn’t happen a lot.”  
“I never would have guessed. Your sister scared me when she told you to be nice before I came into your room. But you were perfectly nice to me.”  
“Sorry I distracted you though.”  
“Oh it was a nice distraction alright. Will you tell me what they mean sometime? I mean… if you would like to have another date that is?”  
“Is it what it is? A date?”  
“Wasn’t it?”

Alec saw that Magnus was giving him an out. He could opt for no, and say it was just a friendly meal and leave it at that. Despite everything, a small part of Alec considered taking it. Because he didn’t know if he was ready for dating again. But Magnus was so nice and kind, and they seemed to get along well. 

“I think it was. Haven’t dated in a while so I just wanted to make sure we were on the same page. Glad that we are.”  
“Me too.”  
“I’m gonna have to go, I have a dinner with my family later. I don’t know how I will manage to eat after this lunch. I can already hear my mother complaining that I don’t eat enough and look too skinny.”  
“I think you look just fine Alec. Is Alec short for something?”  
“Alexander.”  
“Oh, strong name. Alexander, I like that. Do you mind?”

Nobody called him Alexander. His mother did when she was angry. His siblings when they were making fun of him. And Logan, sometimes. But the way Magnus said it sounded different and Alec felt ok with him using it.

“No. Not a lot of people use it but I don’t mind. It is my name after all.”  
“Perfect. Before you go, should we exchange phone numbers so we can stay in touch?”  
“I’d like that.”

Alec gave his phone to Magnus who entered his number and then called his cell. 

“There. Now you have my number and I have yours. We can decide on what we want to do next. The only day I’m never available is the first Thursday of every month. I have a standing date with my best friends and there’s no way around it.”  
“I wouldn’t dream of taking time away from your friends. It’s nice that you have something that you can make happen so often.”  
“We had to schedule it at some point. Between my restaurant and Cat’s job at the hospital, only Ragnor would be available anytime. Clary regularly comes to those too.”  
“She’s a good friend of yours?”  
“You could say that. She is more my sister than my friend actually. Her parents are my foster parents. When I arrived at their home, I was fourteen and she was barely ten. We spent our teenage years together. I don’t tell people at first because I get stupid questions on how she can be my sister when we don’t look alike.”  
“I understand. I get the same looks when I tell Jace is my brother.”  
“So you know. It’s easier to say she’s a friend to people we don’t know or don’t expect to see more than once. Also because I don’t want to have to get into my personal life with everyone.”  
“Thanks for telling me then. I’m sorry I have to cut this short, but Isabelle is gonna kill me if I’m not back at the shop by five.”  
“It’s already 4:30? I’m supposed to be working in an hour, I need to run too.”  
“I’ll call you?”  
“Yes, please.”  
“Thanks again for today Magnus, I had a lovely time.”  
“Thanks for… everything I guess. I adore my tattoo and I had the best time with you too.”

Alec left and walked back slowly to the shop. When he arrived, all the clients had already left and so had Jace. Only Isabelle remained, working on some design behind her desk.

“So Alec, care to tell me where you disappeared this afternoon?”  
“Are you my mother?”  
“Oh secretive… Spill.”  
“I went to have lunch with Magnus.”  
“You did?”  
“He invited me.”  
“Ha, like he’s the first one to do so… You never said yes before though. What made you say yes?”  
“I don’t know how to explain it Iz. It felt right. We are quite similar.”  
“Really? Doesn’t look like it from the outside. I’m not being a bitch Alec, I’m just stating facts. You don’t look like you’d share many traits. He’s dressed with the latest fashion and you know what I think about your black jeans and grey t-shirts.”  
“So? It’s not because he values fashion to the point that you do. I’m talking about values and even history in a way. We don’t have the same background but we’ve come to the same conclusions.”  
“I’m happy you’re trying Alec. It’s been a while.”  
“I know Iz. Either I wasn’t ready, or I hadn’t met the right person to be ready with again. I’m not saying it’s going to THE story, but I feel comfortable talking with him. I feel safe.”  
“I’m glad. I’m cleaning my table and we can go.”  
“Fine, I’ll be in the back, call me when you want to leave.”

Alec went back to his room and saw Magnus’ design on the mirror. He couldn’t really explain why he had felt so enchanted by the man. It wasn’t the first time that he’d met a handsome man, and certainly not the first time someone had looked at him the way Magnus had. But when he talked, Alec could relate to what he was saying, despite it being a completely different story from his own. 

Alec wouldn’t describe himself as a confident man. He would admit that he often appeared so. Many things made that possible: he was tall, he had mastered a scowl and he easily bantered. But to anyone who truly knew him, those were just the facades that he put up to avoid letting people get close to him. Because he didn’t want anyone to come too close. He had his family and it was enough.

He would use this confidence on a night out, with a very specific goal in mind. But those were just nights passing by, never staying longer than necessary. And never getting attached. He almost never even gave his real name. He had taken the idea from Ken Adams in Friends. The idea had been a funny banter between him and Jace at first, but the more he had thought about it, the more Alec had liked the idea. So he chose a very specific part of town where he was less susceptible to meeting people he knew. It wasn’t perfect, but still better than abstinence.

He was still lost in his thoughts when he heard Isabelle call him.

“You ready to go?”  
“Sure, I’m not doing anything specific. Do we have to bring something?”  
“No, mom said she took care of everything. I guess she’s happy seeing us again after those last weeks.”  
“I hope they had a nice vacation, they really deserved it.”  
“It would appear so. Come on, they’ll tell us more about it when we’re there.”

They closed the shop and went to the Lightwood brownstone. The house wasn’t the one they had grown up in. They used to live in central Manhattan when they were younger, but their parents had decided to move to Brooklyn when Alec had left for university. Their reasoning had been that they would need a bigger place than their apartment for when they’d have grandchildren.

Alec and Isabelle arrived last. Jace was already talking with Max and Robert, while Maryse could be heard singing in the kitchen.

“Hi Dad.”  
“Hey Alec, how are you?”  
“Good. The question is how are you? Did you have a nice vacation?”  
“We did. The resort was lovely, we have to go there another time with all of you.”  
“I’m glad. I’m gonna go see Mom.”

Alec walked to the kitchen and laughed when he saw his mother dancing, her back turned to the door, a glass of wine in hand, swaying to the music.

“Hi mom.”  
“Oh my god Alec, you scared me.”  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to.”  
“Sure you didn’t.”

Maryse crossed the room and hugged Alec. It felt so good to have them back. Alec didn’t talk to a lot of people outside his family and his mother definitely was one of his go-to people when he needed advice.

“What’s new with you my boy?”  
“Nothing much. Did you enjoy your vacation?”  
“I really did. But I’m glad to be back. I missed you all.”  
“We missed you too.”

They rejoined the others in the living room and found Jace and Robert in a heated discussion while Izzy and Max just laughed at them.

“Everyone, we’re ready to move this to the table.”  
“Great, I’m starved. Kids, get to the table.”

They took their respective spots at the table and started taking some more about the vacation their parents had just had. The more Alec looked at his parents, the more he hoped for something like what they had. They had met in college and started dating just at the end of it. They had been inseparable ever since.

They also were the best parents Alec could ever have hoped for. He was 15 when he came out to them. And it hadn’t been a big thing. They had been casually chatting over dinner about one of the last movies they had seen together.

“This movie was great. I don’t know who my favorite character is though.”  
“I know, it’s David. Have you seen that man? He’s gorgeous.”  
“David? Not Mark?”  
“Nah, Mark is way too obvious. I prefer reserved and quiet to…”  
“To what sweetheart?”  
“To… uh…”  
“Alec breathe my boy. It’s alright. So, you prefer men reserved and quiet instead of?”  
“Instead of too outgoing. I like the calm.”  
“I can’t say I’m surprised. You’re not a party goer like your sister is.”  
“Hey!”  
“Don’t play offended Isabelle. David or Mark?”  
“Well Mark, obviously.”  
“I rest my case.”

They had finished their talk, Maryse’s hand on Alec forearm, slowly rubbing her thumb on his arm to help him calm down. It had been as easy as that. No talk, no big declaration. Just a casual slip up. 

He had had a very serious talk with his dad a few weeks afterwards, about safe sex and the fact that he could always come to them no matter what. Alec cherished that, despite the embarrassment of the talk. Because he knew of friends who sadly had to stay hidden from their families. He never really had a serious talk about it all with his parents until he had been in a serious relationship. He needed them to know that they had helped, because they really had.

“So, what’s new with the lot of you?”  
“Alec tattooed someone today.”  
“Isn’t that normal Isabelle? For someone who works in a tattoo shop?”  
“Oh that’s normal, even if he doesn’t do it often.”  
“What was so special about this tattoo Alec?”  
“The guy I did it for has a really interesting story. I am glad I could help him with his project.”  
“That’s great Alec. Are you done with it or do you have another session planned?”  
“I’m done with his tattoo, yes.”  
“I’m sensing you’re hiding something…”  
“He is.”  
“Iz!”  
“Children don’t fight. Alexander, on with it.”  
“Magnus invited me for lunch and I said yes.”  
“Magnus as in your client?”  
“Yes.”  
“Did you say yes because he’s your client?”  
“No Mom. I said yes because he’s nice and interesting.”  
“Good for you Alec. I’m glad you’ve met someone.”  
“Can we please try not to make a big deal out of it? It was one lunch, nothing more.”  
“Do you plan on seeing him again?”  
“I do. But again, please, can we just…”  
“Sure Alexander. But we’ll get back to it if it gets more serious.”  
“Ok Mom.”

They shared dinner and talked about the resort the Lightwoods’ parents stayed in. Apparently, despite the beach being a second away from the hotel, they had preferred staying near the pool.

“Of course we stayed near the pool. It took the waiter so much longer to bring us our drinks on the beach than near the pool.”  
“Mom, you sound like you enjoyed the drinks more than the ocean.”  
“I’m sorry Dear but Jace is right.”  
“Robert, you know I loved the ocean. They just happened to have excellent drinks too.”  
“What else did you do? Aside from drinking I mean?”  
“We visited some islands nearby. We snorkeled, swam, tried something called paddle I think?”  
“Paddleboard, yes. Looks like you had a fun time.”  
“Yes. Mostly, we enjoyed waking up whenever and lounging in bed and doing nothing.”  
“I’m happy for you Mom. It was well deserved. Back to the office tomorrow?”  
“Yes, we have to at some point right? But Alec, if one day you’re looking for a destination for pictures, this is definitely a nice place.”  
“Thanks Mom, I’ll keep that in mind.”

They finished dinner and Alec left early enough so he could text Magnus. 

Hey Magnus, I had a wonderful time today, sorry I had to cut it short. The end of my week is pretty hectic, but I have Mondays off. Would you be available then? Let me know! Take care. Alec

He didn’t get an answer before going to bed but wasn’t that surprised. After all, being a chef in your own restaurant probably meant that you had to stay in the kitchen until late. Alec got ready for bed and then turned on the tv. He was watching a rerun of Dancing with the Stars when he got an answer from Magnus.

Hey Alexander, I had a lovely time too, aside from where you were poking holes in my skin. I happen to be free on Mondays, yes! Could we do lunch? Take care and talk to you soon. Magnus

Alec finished his rerun and answered that he was perfectly fine with lunch. He would just have to put his alarm on, Monday usually was the day he slept in. He didn’t mind though. Magnus was intriguing. Alec hadn’t felt attracted to someone like he had to Magnus in such a long time. 

But he didn’t want to get too involved just yet. He needed more time. He also wasn’t sure was ready. But there wasn’t really any other way than trying, right? And at least, as Isabelle had said, he was trying.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First date and some talks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, 
> 
> I've decided to push back the updates to Wednesdays, my schedule is usually clearer on that specific day :)
> 
> So, chapter 3 is here, I'm currently writing chapter 9, I'm 33700 words in. Not sure I'll manage to reach 50k before next Monday. But since I'm updating one chapter a week, I'll put this one on the side to do a Holiday special and get back to it afterwards, I already have enough ready :)
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or on twitter @caronahya
> 
> Enjoy :)

On Sunday morning, Alec met up with Jace for their weekly training session. They had started about a year ago when Alec had wanted to get back in shape. They would either run or go to the gym, depending mostly on the weather and their moods. Today would be a running-in-the-park kind of day. 

“So, you’ve heard from Magnus?”  
“Excuse me, is it a training or a gossip session?”  
“Come on man. Or maybe you don’t have the stamina to do both?”  
“Don’t try to goat me, it won’t work.”  
“Alec, I just want us to talk. You’ve been so secretive I don’t even know what’s going on with you anymore.”  
“Easy, nothing.”  
“Maybe. But I’d like to make sure that you’re doing ok.”  
“I am.”  
“So, did you hear about Magnus?”  
“Ugh Jace… yes I did. We’re going on a date tomorrow. We’re having lunch together.”  
“Date?”  
“Yes. Why? Is that a problem?”  
“Alec please don’t get defensive. I’m truly interested. And again, I’m looking out for you.”  
“You do realize I’m 29?”  
“I know grandpa.”  
“You’re the same age.”  
“Your point? Anyway, I just… Listen, I’m here if you need to talk ok? I won’t bug you with questions or anything, but if you need someone to listen, I’m there.”  
“Thanks Jace, I know. There’s not much to say just yet. We’ve had lunch when he came into the shop. We’re having lunch again tomorrow. I’m trying not to put too much pressure on it all. I don’t want to ask myself too many questions.”  
“But you like him?”  
“Yes Jace, I do. I wouldn’t see him again otherwise.”  
“Well, it could be for other reasons, more physical ones.”  
“No, I don’t do repeats when it comes to that.”

Alec heard Jace choke a little next to him and that made him laugh.

“Come on Jace, you didn’t expect me to be a saint now did you?”  
“I don’t know Alec. You never talk about anything, to anyone. I even wondered at some point if you hadn’t decided to stop trying to find someone.”  
“I’m not looking Jace. I needed time. I don’t even know if I’m ready yet. But Magnus, I don’t know. He has something that I can’t explain. I feel…”  
“Attracted?”  
“Yes, that too. But it’s more than just physical. His story and mine, while being different, are so similar.”  
“I’m glad Alec. I really hope this turns out to be a good thing.”  
“You and me both Jace.”

They separated after their run and Alec got home to shower. Sundays afternoon usually meant spending some time in pictures. Alec had many cases of old photographs he’d taken many years before, that he had kept as souvenirs, or as potential art ideas. But this Sunday, he didn’t feel like looking at them. The realization of him spending his free days watching memories from his past hit him like a train. He had never paid attention to it. Today though, it made him see how stuck in his past he was. And it wasn’t a good thing. It really was time for him to think about the future, instead of looking back in the past. 

So for the first time in a while, on a Sunday afternoon, Alec grabbed a book and sat cozily in his couch, a steaming hot cup of coffee in front of him, and began reading. The many unread books from his collection would be happy to be of use, finally. 

The sudden buzzing sound of his phone got him out of his readings, and he realized with shock that it was already pas 7pm. The text was from Magnus, asking if things were still good for the following day. A smile crept on Alec’s face as he read the message and he typed his answer confirming their plans.

Alec hadn’t dated anyone in a long time, as he had told Jace, it wasn’t the lack of opportunity, but more the lack of wanting to. It had never felt right. But Magnus had been different. Alec couldn’t really explain why, there was no real reason that came to mind, more a general feeling. When the man had entered at first, Alec wasn’t ashamed to admit it, he had considered turning his appointment into a one-night stand. Because Magnus was gorgeous. And then, they had talked about his tattoo and his story and Alec had felt a pull. Something different, something more. Something enough to make him want to go and see what was behind.

Monday morning came fast and Alec was ready early. The anticipation was something he had lost the feeling of. He picked out clothes that he wouldn’t normally wear to the shop but in which he still felt comfortable enough. Around 10am, his phone buzzed and Alec got worried Magnus might cancel. It turned out to be something completely different. He was supposed to get a delivery in between noon and 2pm. 

Alec had completely forgotten about that package. Of course, empirically, he knew something had been sent to him and that of course it would arrive at some point. But the fact that it was this soon had slipped his mind. And now, Alec was faced with two possible options: cancel Magnus, which he really didn’t want to; or invite him over in his apartment. As strange as it might sound, Alec wasn’t very comfortable with that second option either. His apartment had been his place for as long as he had come back. He had never brought a single person in his house who wasn’t family. But the prospect of cancelling left a bitter taste in his mouth. This only meant that his choice was already made, in a way. So Alec grabbed his phone and sent a quick text to Magnus explaining the situation, and offering to cook lunch for them instead. He then remembered that Magnus was a chef and it wasn’t necessarily the best idea to cook for him. He got Magnus’ answer while he was still thinking this over.

Hey Alec, I don’t mind at all. But I would completely understand if you’d prefer postponing. If not, just send me your address and I’ll be with you around 12:30 if that’s ok? And don’t worry, I’m not a picky eater ;) Magnus

Alec smiled and decided to start cooking. At least his mind would be busy for a little while. He didn’t have many recipes that he could whip up in a few minutes, but he made a mean pasta with marinated chicken which was easy, quick and for which he happened to have everything at home. He poured some red wine to give it time to breathe.

Of course, it also meant that he had to clean a little more. Or, to be more precise, to organize things a little more. A few clothes were dropped here and there, and the table in front of the tv was filled with tattoo magazines. After gathering everything and putting it back in place, Alec took a look around and was pleased with how the room looked. He had barely finished when the doorbell rang.

“Hi Magnus. Found the place ok?”  
“Hi Alexander. I did, I know the neighborhood. Did you know you don’t live that far from Clary?”  
“I didn’t know that. I’m sorry I had to make changes last minute, I had completely forgotten about this delivery until I got the notification on my phone this morning.”  
“I don’t mind. As long as you’re sure you don’t mind having me over.”  
“The other option was cancelling and that wasn’t an option to me.”

Alec watched Magnus’ smile widen at this. They moved to Alec’s living room and settled on the couch, with some drinks.

“I have to tell you, there’s one thing that worries me though.”  
“Really? What is that?”  
“Well, I have to cook for you.”

Alec heard magnus laugh and was glad the reaction he was hoping for happened. Magnus was beautiful any time, but when he laughed, there was kind of an insouciance in it. 

“Don’t worry about it Alexander, I don’t expect everyone to cook as a chef. We could always order take out if you’d prefer?”  
“No, no, it’s ok. I’ve set the chicken to marinate and I’ll make pasta with it. Simple but efficient.”  
“Sounds delicious.”  
“That’s one of the first dishes my mom taught me how to make. She got worried when I moved out from home, especially since we’d be just boys in the new place and none of us had any idea on how to boil water. I’m glad she taught me, cooking is a basic skill anyone should have.”  
“It is part of the most basic things you need, I agree. Along with anything domestic I guess.”  
“Exactly. I’m so thankful my parents weren’t the stereotype kind of people. I remember my dad doing the laundry while my mom would be building shelves. They set the best example for us.”  
“Your parents sound like very interesting people. Are you still close to them?”  
“I am. We see each other all the time, they actually don’t live that far from here.” 

They were interrupted by the bell. Alec got up and opened the door to retrieve a package. The box was huge, Alec wondered exactly what Logan had sent him back. He didn’t remember having so many things left there. He closed the door and went to put the box in his bedroom. He wanted to open it, he really wanted to know what was inside, but he wouldn’t do it now. He had Magnus with him and he needed to focus on the present for now. The past would have to wait. 

“Sorry about that. But since it’s barely 1:00 and the delivery is already there, do you prefer going out for lunch?”  
“Oh, as you wish I guess. I really don’t mind being here Alexander but if you’re not comfortable with me in your apartment, we can go out.”  
“I’m comfortable with you here, don’t worry. I was mostly offering you a lunch more refined than pasta.”  
“Do you want us to make something on the side? I could help you? I love pasta and I love chicken, so your meal sounds good. Do you want us to make either starters or dessert?”  
“We could make dessert? I don’t think I have a lot of things to make starters, but I always have everything for cake.”  
“Let’s go then, to the kitchen!”

The enthusiasm Magnus was showing made Alec relax a bit more. They moved to the kitchen and got things ready for baking a chocolate cake. 

“I’m impressed Alexander.”  
“Magnus, we’re only making a simple chocolate cake, nothing too difficult about that.”  
“Baking is probably the hardest part of cooking. You need to be very precise when you bake, because any change in the composition will change the texture and make it a disaster. And you are extremely precise.”  
“Precision is part of my job Magnus. Maybe in a different way but the analogy works anyway. If the line I’m drawing is supposed to stop at a specific point, I can’t really make it go an inch more, it would change everything and make it a disaster.”  
“I guess I hadn’t thought about it that way. True.”  
“Ok, now that this is in the oven, what do you say we start making the pasta? This is my favorite dish to make, it’s easy but tasteful. I don’t really like spending hours in the kitchen so I tend to go for basics.”  
“Basics can be excellent. With the right spices blend, you can make the most simple recipe a very good dish. Do you want my help or do you want me to just watch?”  
“You’re my guest Magnus. I wanted you to help for the dessert because I don’t usually bake. But I’m good with doing this one on my own. I’ll accept criticism though, if you have better ideas.”  
“Ok, I’ll see. Let me first watch what you’re doing.”

Alec moved around in the kitchen and got the food ready. He could feel Magnus’ eyes on him and instead of the stress he expected, he found that it rather grounded him. They didn’t talk much, just basking in each other’s presence. When Alec was almost done, he turned around to see Magnus standing extremely close to him. Clearly, the other man hadn’t expected Alec to turn around, if the surprise on his face was any indication.

“I’m sorry Alexander, I wanted to check how you were doing this.”  
“No worries.”

Alec saw Magnus’ gaze move to his lips and the need to reciprocate was overwhelming so Alec let his own eyes drift to Magnus’ lips. He got his eyes back up and realized that despite his apology, Magnus hadn’t moved at all. The way both their breathing had accelerated made it obvious that they both were thinking the same thing.

“It would be a shame not to use the proximity though.”  
“What do you have in mind Alexander?”

Alec smiled and closed the gap between them. He let his lips slowly coax Magnus’, enjoying the first time their lips met, discovering each other. His hand went to Magnus’ waist and he brought him even closer, when he felt the other man deepen the kiss. They broke apart a few minutes later, both smiling.

“I must say I’ve wanted to do that since the first time I met you.”  
“Me too Alexander. Your state of undress didn’t really help my predicament then.”  
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting anyone.”  
“Oh I didn’t mind. It just got complicated to focus on anything else.”

They moved to the table and started eating.

“I must say Alexander this is pretty good. I love what you did with the chicken. And you know how to cook pasta, it’s just al dente.”  
“I learned that in Italy.”  
“Not surprising. Maybe I should send my foster mom in Italy then. She’s a nightmare when it comes to pasta.”  
“You foster mom is Clary’s mom right?”  
“Yes, Jocelyn. She is one of the kindest person I know. Not a great cook though. But she makes up for it with many other qualities.”  
“Do you have other siblings than Clary?”  
“No. She was an only child until I came along. Her best friend is kind of like a brother to her, and he spends so much time with us that it feels like it. It was a blessing when Jocelyn and Luke agreed to take me in. I didn’t have a lot of faith in being out of the system.”  
“Why?”  
“To begin with, I was already a teenager. When people are looking to adopt children, they want babies, or toddlers. Not an almost already grown up kid. And then my past wasn’t the brightest so I think it scared many people.”  
“I’m sorry.”  
“Nothing you can do about it. I understand it now that I’m older but at the time, it was the hardest thing. I saw so many children leave the orphanage and I had to stay there. Not that they treated us badly or anything, I just wanted to have a family of my own I guess. I’m sorry, this is a heavy topic.”  
“Well, I’m not one to judge on topic or luggage, believe me… How long before Clary’s family came for you?”  
“Around 6 years, give or take a few months. At first I didn’t want to believe it. I met with them a first time. Jocelyn and Luke were so kind and nice with every kid they saw that day. I remember talking to them thinking that they would offer a perfect family to the kid they’d be taking into their care. In the end, it’s Clary who saved me.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Jocelyn couldn’t have children after delivering Clary, too many complications at childbirth. She separated from her husband after a few months, because things got too much. He wanted another child, she was still grieving and he really didn’t understand that. So she packed up and left with Clary. She met Luke a few months later. She was upfront from the start and it never was a problem for him. But then, as years passed, they wanted more so they thought of adopting a kid from the foster care. Jocelyn has hair kinda like Clary, just a tad darker and I remember the first time I saw her how in love I was with her hair color. It was so beautiful and warm. Anyway, they left the orphanage that first time and then came back maybe a week later, with Clary. Because they had talked about adopting with her and she had been adamant that she didn’t want to be a big sister. She wanted a big brother. So they came back to see me. We got along instantly, she already was so talkative and so nice, it was easy to get along with her. I kept thinking how great it would be to be a big brother, to have a sister to look out for.”

Alec could see that Magnus was getting overwhelmed. He placed his hand on top of the other man’s and tried to soothe him with his thumbs.

“You don’t have to go on if you don’t want to Magnus, it’s ok.”  
“I want to. It’s just, sometimes I still can’t believe they chose me.”  
“They made the right choice if you ask me. You deserved that chance, as much as any other child in that room.”  
“Thank you Alexander. I can tell you the rest if you want to know.”  
“Please.”  
“So after that meeting with the Fray-Garroway household, I went back to my room and wished so hard for them to pick me. The news came in a week later. They had asked for me. I moved in with them a few weeks later. Clary became one of my best friends, I never let her out of my sight. So when she started to visit a certain tattoo shop regularly I had to check why. I understood as soon as I saw your brother, he’s definitely her type. And after seeing your shop from outside, I got confirmation that I needed a tattoo. And then I met you.”  
“I’m glad Clary met Jace then. Speaking of tattoo, how is the healing going?”  
“Good, it’s not itching anymore. And it feels pretty smooth but I can’t really check more.”  
“Do you want me to check?”  
“Are you trying to get me out of my shirt Alexander?”  
“No! I didn’t mean it that way.”  
“Relax, I’m just teasing. Just getting back at you for making fun of MY staring. But yes, I’d like it if you could check.”

Magnus stood up and got his shirt off. He turned over so Alec could check it. The tattoo was almost fully healed, which was good. The skin didn’t look too dry but it probably needed some ointment on it in the evening to make it even better.

“It looks good Magnus. Just put moisturizer on it in the evening to help the healing. But it’s already looking perfect.”

Magnus turned around and Alec realized once more how close they were standing to one another. He took a step back and smiled at Magnus.

“I’d really like to kiss you Magnus.”  
“What’s stopping you?”

He went back in and kissed the man, slowly, while his hand were running up and down Magnus’ arms. 

“Do you want to stay a bit and watch tv? I don’t have anything planned the afternoon.”  
“I’d love that, I don’t have any plans either.”

They moved to the couch and Alec turned on the tv. The show that was on was one of Alec’s favorite. It talked about arts in general, with a focus on photography mainly and paintings.

“I love this program. It reminds me so much of when I was studying art. Photography was my favorite topic.”  
“How does someone go from photography to tattoo?”

Alec tensed next to Magnus. He hadn’t really expected the question and wasn’t ready to delve in his story. Not today.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”  
“It’s ok. I worked in photography for a while. I just needed a change. And Isabelle and Jace were already tattooing, so it kind of all fell into place. We don’t have to watch this show though, we can try to find something else.”  
“No, leave it on. It allows me to get to know you a bit better.”

Alec felt warm and comfortable. He couldn’t remember what time it was or where he was but he the weight on him felt like a perfect blanket. He could have stayed like for hours, but a noise made him open his eyes. He realized that it was still light outside. And that his sister was standing in front of him, a smirk so obvious on her face. Alec followed her gaze and realized that the so comfortable blanket wasn’t a blanket at all, but Magnus, who had drifted on top of him while they had fallen asleep. Alec made a motion with his hand to tell Izzy to go to the kitchen. She stuck her tongue at him but went anyway. 

“Magnus?”  
“Hmm…”  
“Magnus, you need to wake up.”  
“What?”  
“We’ve fallen asleep watching tv.”

Alec saw the moment Magnus realized where he was. He stood up fast and looked at Alec.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep, I guess I was more tired than I thought.”  
“I fell asleep too, so don’t worry about it.”  
“Yes, but you weren’t sleeping on top of me.”  
“I’ve been told already that I make a great pillow, lot of space it would seem.”  
“I agree, you’re a giant. And very soft.”  
“My sister is in the kitchen. It’s up to you, you can stay for a drink with us, or I can usher you to the door.”  
“I’m going to go. I need to be home for dinner anyway.”  
“Ok.”  
“But I can say hi to dear Isabelle, I don’t want her to think I’m rude.”  
“Remember that I tried to avoid you that, ok?”

Both men went to the kitchen, to find Isabelle perched on a chair, a glass of water in hand.

“Well hello there, sleeping beauties.”  
“Iz, cut it.”  
“Hi Isabelle. Looking beautiful, as usual.”  
“Smooth talker.”  
“Just telling the truth my dear. I’m sorry I have to run, I have friends coming over tonight.”  
“I’m sure I’ll be seeing you soon anyway. Bye Magnus.”  
“I hope you will. Bye Isabelle.”

Alec took Magnus to the door.

“Sorry for the rush.”  
“Really it’s no bother, I have to be home in a few anyway. Thank you for today Alexander, I had a lovely afternoon.”  
“Me too, even if we fell asleep.”  
“We probably needed the rest. I’ll text you so we can meet up again?”  
“I’d really like that, yes.”  
“Ok.”

Before leaving, Magnus turned around and dropped a quick kiss on Alec’s lips.

“I just wanted to be the one to initiate this time. Bye Alexander.”  
“To repeat what you told me, you can initiate any time. Bye Magnus.”

Alec closed the door, squared his shoulders and went to his kitchen.

“So, Alexander…”  
“Don’t call me that.”  
“Magnus does.”  
“You’re not Magnus, Iz.”  
“He already has special privileges, I feel cheated.”  
“You’ve always hated my name, don’t try to make it sound differently.”  
“Fine. Why were you here by the way? Weren’t you supposed to go to the restaurant?”  
“We were, but I got a notification saying my package would arrive during lunch time.”  
“What package?”  
“Logan sent me back some stuff I apparently still had there. I’ve put the box in my room, haven’t looked inside yet.”  
“Do you want me to be there when you do?”  
“Nah, I’m good. I probably won’t open it today anyway, I’m not in the mood for it.”  
“I know it’s new and probably not much yet, but I love the new attitude. Alec from a few weeks ago would have opened that box as soon as it arrived.”  
“You’re right. And there’s not much to tell about Magnus, we’re just seeing each other, it’s all very casual.”  
“For now. It doesn’t matter. I’m just glad you’re opening up again Alec, I miss seeing you happy.”  
“I miss it too Iz.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A party, a glimpse in the past. We follow Magnus and Alec on their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> I'll post my Christmas story later today, but I wanted to update this one too. New chapter, many things happening in this one. I hope you'll enjoy getting a few snippets from the past. At some point, it'll get clearer, but not today ;)
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> Enjoy!

The following days went by without any teasing from his siblings. Alec had asked Isabelle not to say anything to anyone and she had kept her words. The wave of emotions was overwhelming Alec and he didn’t want to have to think about it just yet. He was happy just going through the motions. Life had taught him that planning, despite being prepared at its best, could be overcome by a hurricane no one expected. That lesson had been tough but Alec had decided then that nothing would be the same again. 

Throughout the week, Magnus had texted him and Alec had answered. Alec had decided to let the other man in charge, because he clearly wasn’t trusting himself with this. And Magnus didn’t seem to mind. Ten days after their last date, Isabelle came into Alec’s tattoo room.

“Hey Alec, we’re thinking of having friends over this Saturday. What do you say?”  
“Who are friends, exactly?”  
“Jace wants to invite Clary and her best friend is coming, Simon I think.”  
“So our brother just wants us to play buffers.”  
“Yes. What kind of family would we be if we said no?”  
“Fine. I suppose you guys want to come to my place?”  
“You have the biggest apartment.”  
“Ok, let’s say Saturday 7pm then.”  
“I’ll tell Jace. Do you think maybe you’d want to invite Magnus? I don’t want to pry Alec, I would just like to get to know him better. And he knows Clary so I’m sure he’d like that.”  
“I’ll ask him.”

Isabelle smiled at him and Alec watched her leave, almost skipping out of his room. He loved that playful side of his sister. She might be almost 28, but she was still a kid at heart. For the first time since their encounter, Alec called Magnus.

“Alexander, what a wonderful surprise.”  
“Hi Magnus. Are you busy?”  
“I have time for you Alexander. What can I help you with?”  
“We’re having a small gathering next Saturday at my place and I was wondering if you’d like to come. My brother and sister will be there, along with Clary and her best friend I think.”  
“Oh dear, have you ever met Simon before?”  
“No, why?”  
“No reason. And yes, I am free next Saturday, thank you for inviting me. Do you want me to bring anything?”  
“No we’re good, thanks. And what I mean by that is that we usually just order pizza. You ok with pizza?”  
“I am. What time should I come?”  
“Around 7?”  
“Perfect. See you then. Bye Alexander.”  
“Bye Magnus.”

After ending his call, Alec went back to the main station to find Isabelle.

“question for you: have you met Simon yet?”  
“No. Why?”  
“Magnus asked me if I had and I don’t know, I could almost hear him laughing behind his words.”  
“This should be fun then. You invited Magnus?”  
“I did. He’s coming around 7.”  
“You could have told him to come earlier.”  
“Iz, let’s not make a big deal out of it for now? I’m just trying to enjoy things as they come.”  
“Fine. But you should tell Jace. At least you should use your scowl on him if you don’t want him to have the brother talk when he meets Magnus again.”  
“I’ll talk to him.”

Saturday arrived and when the Lightwoods closed the shop, the three of them went to Alec’s to get change and ready for the evening.

“So remember, no one makes Clary uncomfortable. She’s not super at ease coming here, thank you brother, so let’s try not to add to that.”  
“Hey, I resent that. Why doesn’t she want to come here?”  
“You’re scary Alec.”  
“I am not.”  
“Yes you are. Aside the obvious fact that you’re tall, you have tattoos everywhere and you’re always sporting a scowl worth of any judging person.”  
“I’m not judging. I just don’t like bullshit.”  
“Please be nice to her?”  
“I am nice. She just talks a lot.”  
“Ha, wait until you meant Simon.”  
“That’s what Magnus meant then.”  
“Magnus?”  
“Magnus knows Clary, and he told me about Simon. He’s also invited tonight. So I’d appreciate if you could reserve him the same treatment as the one you’re asking me to provide Clary with.”  
“Fair enough. Does this mean that you guys are getting serious?”  
“No Jace. It means we’re casually seeing each other. I don’t want…”  
“Alec, it’s ok. I understand if you don’t want to talk about it.”  
“It’s not that. I just don’t want to get over my head for this. It’s still super new, like days new. And yes he seems nice and funny and damn he’s gorgeous, but…”  
“You have to protect yourself?”  
“Exactly.”  
“Listen Alec, I know it’s not easy but you won’t always be able to do so. You need to open up, and let go a little. It might be difficult and it might hurt, but if you don’t try, it’ll only be regrets. Don’t get me wrong, I think what you’re doing with Magnus is great. But this faux-nonchalance isn’t you. You’re not that guy.”   
“I just don’t want to get hurt again.”  
“I know Alec, I know.”

Alec realized Isabelle had left the room, probably to give the brothers some privacy. She came back to the living room with a tray filled with drinks and snacks. Just as she put it on the table, the doorbell rang. Alec went to open the door and saw Clary and Magnus along with another guy who Alec assumed was Simon. Both Clary and Simon had a nervous look on their face, while Magnus was looking unsure.

“Hi everyone, welcome.”  
“Hi Alec, thanks for having us over. This is my best friend Simon. And, of course, you already know Magnus.”  
“Come on in guys. Make yourself at home.”

Alec was doing his best to sound as welcoming as possible. He was glad to have them over, even if he wasn’t really the type to socialize. Clary and Simon entered first and when Magnus went to follow them, Alec gently grabbed his arm to hold him back. When the others were in the living room, Alec turned around Magnus and kissed him softly.

“Hi. I didn’t know where you stand on kissing in front of your family. But I really wanted to.”  
“That’s very considerate of you. I was having the same doubts myself. Not on my family because they know, but on yours.”  
“They know too, I guess we’re good then.”

They smiled goofily at each other and rejoined everybody in the living room. They arrived to see Simon talking animatedly to Isabelle, a slight blush on his cheeks, while she was smiling. Alec knew that look too well, she was going to eat him alive.

“So, who’s in for a drink? Pizzas will be there in around an hour.”  
“I could go for beer Alec.”  
“Beer for Jace. What about you guys?”  
“Do you have some Prosecco?”  
“You know I do Iz.”  
“Nice. So Prosecco for me. Clary you should try it. It’s an Italian sparkling wine, it’s really good.”  
“Ok, thanks Isabelle.”  
“Magnus? Simon?”  
“I’m going to try the Prosecco too Alexander.”  
“Your name is Alexander? Didn’t you say Alec, Clary?”  
“Oh I wouldn’t call him Alexander if I were you Simon. Even as his little sister I’m not allowed to. That’s a Magnus privilege.”  
“Gotcha. Sorry Alec. I’d like a beer too please?”

Alec smiled at Simon, who looked on the verge of suffocating. Whether it was because of Alec scaring him or Isabelle looking at him, Alec didn’t know. But he decided to let it slide. He knew for a fact that when he was with his siblings, they tended to make people uncomfortable. 

“Ok, give me a sec and I’ll bring everything back.”  
“I’ll give you a hand Alexander.”

Jace snorted at the use of Alec’s full name and received a glare from his brother that stopped him short. Alec moved to his kitchen and went to grab the drinks.

“So Alexander, what do the Lightwood siblings do on a family night?”  
“Mostly? We talk. We just catch up on where everyone is.”  
“But you see each other all the time at work.”  
“True. But we don’t talk that much. We all have separate areas and most of the time, the days are packed. It’s nice to just sit back and enjoy them. I’ve missed them when I wasn’t living here.”  
“You look really close, I’m sure it must have been hard.”  
“I had other people in my life back then. But yes, I missed them a lot. I had never been away from them for more than a few weeks. It was also super hard on Jace, for other reasons.”

Alec didn’t elaborate. He didn’t mind talking about his brother’s story but now wasn’t the time.

“I feel the need to ask: is Jace good enough for my sister?”  
“Do you want my answer as his brother? Or as a big brother to a little sister?”  
“Touché. Both?”  
“As a big brother, I will tell you that no one will ever be good enough for her. But you can only hope that it’ll be someone who treats her right and respects her. As Jace’s brother, I will tell you that he’s hot-headed, but he has a heart of gold. He can be oblivious from time to time, but he will not intentionally hurt her.”  
“I guess I can work with that.”

They moved back to the living room with the drinks, to find everyone in a heated conversation about Star Wars. From the looks of it, Isabelle and Simon seemed to be on the same side, while Clary and Jace argued against them. The others hadn’t really paid attention to Magnus and Alec coming back, so Alec noiselessly joined Magnus on the couch and whispered in his ear.

“Is Simon single?”  
“Yes. Why do you ask?”  
“Oh not for me. But he’s scoring many points with my sister taking her side on a Star Wars debate over Jace.”  
“Really? Isabelle?” Magnus’ voice was filled with surprise.  
“What is that supposed to mean?” Alec couldn’t keep the defensive tone out of his voice. He didn’t like it when people assumed things on his sister. Because most of the time those things were not the nicest ones.  
“I just never pictured her with someone like Simon. And I’m saying that with all the respect I have for your sister. But it’s a good thing. Sometimes people have to be on different end of the scale to make things work.”  
“I didn’t mean to get defensive. But past experiences have proven me that men usually have very low respect for women, and particularly my sister.”  
“I understand. Believe me.”

Magnus smiled at Alec and they both went back to watching the match happening in front of them.

“I swear Iz, if you say one more time that the new ones are better I’ll…”  
“What will you do Jace? It’s not my fault your lacking taste.”  
“Next thing you’ll tell me you prefer this baby Yoda thing to the original one.”  
“Of course I do.”  
“Iz!”  
“Well in her defense, he’s pretty darn cute.”  
“Simon, I don’t know you, but I really like you.”  
“Thanks Isabelle.”

Alec just laughed at the look on Simon’s face and the slight blush of his cheeks. The sound of his laugh stopped the conversation for a second and everybody looked at them. Alec felt a bit self-conscious for a second. Magnus and him were seated close to one another, their legs touching and Magnus had his hand on Alec’s thigh. Alec saw his sister smirk at him, while Jace tried to hide his smile behind his beer. Clary was just smiling widely at them while Simon was still looking at Isabelle like she had hung the moon and stars.

They went on with their evening, sharing stories and smiling at the similarities between their families. And despite Alec’s previous fears, having his family and new friends over felt good. He hadn’t had an evening like this one in years. Doing it with his siblings was a common occurrence, which he enjoyed a lot. But adding new people had always been touchy for him. Throughout the evening, Alec saw Magnus send him questioning glances but say nothing. When everyone got ready to leave, Alec got closer to Magnus.

“If you want to stay a little longer, I’d be happy to have you.”  
“Thank you Alexander, I’d like that.”

And when the time came for their families to leave, Magnus and Alec could count on them to make fun of the situation.

“So Magnus, do I need to give you the talk? Are you going to be safe?”  
“Clary, do I need to remind you that I’m the oldest?”  
“Doesn’t make you the wisest.”

Alec snorted but his relief was short lived when he saw his siblings.  
“Jace, do you think we can trust our brother?”  
“You guys know it’s MY apartment right?”  
“We know Alec. But I’m not sure Iz. Maybe you need a reminder on…”  
“If you finish this sentence Jace Wayland I swear there’ll be hell to pay.”

Simon, Clary, Isabelle and Jace left the apartment and soon enough, Alec and Magnus had cleaned everything and were just lounging on the couch. 

“Can I ask you something Alexander?”  
“Sure.”  
“You and Jace seem to have an extremely close bond.”  
“We do.”  
“When did he join your family?”  
“He was around eleven at the time, and so was I.”  
“He came pretty late.”  
“It wasn’t exactly planned.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Ok, Magnus I don’t mind talking about all that but it’s neither a happy nor a short story.”  
“I understand. We can talk about something else.” The defeated look in Magnus’ eyes made Alec realized that he had used a voice leaving no room for discussion, where all he wanted was to warn Magnus that things would get heavy if they went on.  
“I really don’t mind talking about it, I just meant it's not a nice story. And Jace doesn’t mind either. Jace’s parents were my parents’ best friends. Both families were so happy when my mom and Jace’s mom got pregnant the same year. They said we’d be the greatest friends.”

And so Alec continued his story. How he and Jace had grown up together, living just a few streets apart. They had gone to the same school and shared many activities together. Then, Isabelle had been born and Alec had a little less time for Jace. He needed to be there for his sister. But when Isabelle had been old enough, she had joined the group and the three of them had been inseparable. This state of happiness lasted for a few years. 

One night, Jace was sleeping at the Lightwoods’ as his parents had to go on a professional business trip. In the middle of the night, the doorbell had rung, and Alec remembered vividly hearing his mother shout and his father trying to comfort her. He had tiptoed down the stairs and heard the police officer. Jace’s parents had had an accident. They had died on the spot. 

Alec remembered the pain he had felt. How worried he had been for his friend. He had gone back to his room and not woken anyone. The following morning, social services had come and taken Jace away. The Waylands had done all the paperwork for the Lightwoods to be in charge of Jace if anything were to happen to them, but the paperwork still had to be processed.

The cries from Jace had torn Alec, deep in his soul. His best friend was suffering and he couldn’t do anything. They had spent two months apart. Of course, now that he was almost 30, Alec knew that two months was close to nothing. At the time, it had felt like the longest period of time in history.

And when Jace had moved back with the Lightwoods, everything was different. Jace wasn’t smiling anymore, ever. He didn’t want to play or share anything with Alec or Iz. He mainly stayed in his room and only shared what he had to with the family. Alec’s mother had then decided to take them all to see a psychologist, to try and help them deal with everything. The loss of Celine and Michael, the change in their lives, the new family. It took them a total of fourteen months to reach a new normal. 

But from this day, Jace had sworn he would never spend a day regretting anything. This had led to many mistakes and Alec’s mom had faced many troubles with him. But Alec had always remained by his side. Jace was his family, his brother. They had different friends in school, never really stayed together there and it suited them. 

The next big shake in their relationship had come when Alec had moved for college. He had moved with two of his closest friends from high school. Jace didn’t want to go to college, he wanted to work. He wanted to be independent, so he found an internship in a tattoo shop. After all, his dad had many tattoos himself, so in a way, he was working for him. Seeing Jace happy had made Isabelle choose to follow his path. Alec’s parents hadn’t been exactly happy about her choice, but the Lightwood household had a very specific rule: “we discuss things as adults, your lives are your choices” and it had meant for Isabelle to follow her brother’s steps.

Alec and Jace’s relationship had suffered from the distance, so when Alec had moved back to New York, Jace had spent a few weeks staying with him every night. Just to catch up on lost time. They had soon gotten their freedom back, but couldn’t spend a lot of time without one another. That’s when Jace had emitted the possibility for Alec to join Isabelle and himself in the shop. After all, Alec was a talented drawer so it wouldn’t be that hard for him to take that step.

“That’s how I joined the shop. I was so happy to be able to see them every day.”  
“I’m sure. Leaving for college must have been hard, especially with your family in New York.”  
“It wasn’t really hard. I had my friends with me in college. And yes I missed my siblings, but… let’s just say that I had other priorities at the time. And it felt good to be someone else other than Jace and Iz’s big brother.”  
“You don’t have to convince me. As I told you, I left Clary’s parents a few weeks after I turned 21. I understand the need to be your own person.”  
“Exactly. And being in a new place, where no one knows you, felt astonishing. I had been so used to always the same people, always the same places, that when a brand new world open, I dived into it without a second thought.”  
“Are you still in touch with your college friends?”

Despite all his best efforts, Alec couldn’t help the tremor that made its way in his body. He tensed next to Magnus and his face closed up. After a few seconds, he realized he hadn’t spoken and felt Magnus’ intrigued gaze on him.

“I’m sorry Magnus. I can’t… I… no, I’m not friends with them anymore. Not really.”  
“Sorry Alexander, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”  
“You didn’t. I just haven’t really spoken about them in a long time and it still feels way too fresh, despite it being years ago.”  
“I understand. I’m glad you have your siblings then.”  
“I’m glad too. My life would be miserable without them.”  
“Again, I get the feeling. But if one day you want to talk about your past, know that will listen and won’t pass judgement.”  
“Thank you Magnus, I appreciate it.”

They remained huddled on Alec’s couch a little longer and when Magnus felt he was about to fall asleep, he turned towards Alec.

“Not that I don’t want a repeat of last time, because I slept like a baby next to you, but I really should get going. Falling asleep in a Uber doesn’t sound like a fairytale.”  
“You’re sure you don’t mind taking a Uber?”  
“I’m sure Alexander. I even prefer it. At least I just have to wait in the warmth while someone drives for me.”  
“Makes sense.”  
“Thank you again for tonight, I had a lovely time.”  
“So did I, I’m glad you came, and ever mor glad you stayed longer.”

Alec bent his head a little until his lips were grazing Magnus’, in a slow, languid kiss. Magnus left and when Alec closed the door, he realized that the more time he spent with Magnus, the less worried he was. It felt good. It felt normal. The sense of freedom was overwhelming for Alec, who just grabbed his picture box and spent a few hours watching them, smiling fondly at the memories.

It didn’t feel like cheating anymore.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New faces appear, while Alec and Magnus progress in their relationship. Until...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> Let me start by apologizing, I'm sure you're not gonna like me in a few moments... We're reaching angst peak. But we're almost there. You know I need my fluff anyway...
> 
> As usual, you can talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> See you next week for this one!

Alec loved his apartment. Not just because of its situation or because it was nicely decorated. No, he adored the place because he was the only tenant to live on the top floor. Which meant that the place was quiet most of the time. The people living under him were an old couple who almost never had any visitor. 

So whether it was for sleeping, or just for relaxing, Alec enjoyed the quiet of it. He had spent a long time looking for the right place after coming back. There didn’t seem to be one where Alec could picture himself living. He had also been in a very dark place, making the choice even harder. 

The piano in the living room called him and Alec sat in front of it, ready to get lost in the music. He enjoyed putting his hands on the keys, take a deep breath in and just let his mind empty while his body took over. But before he could start, he was interrupted by the buzzing sound of his phone. 

“Hi Magnus.”  
“Hello Alexander. How are you?”  
“I’m good. You?”  
“Perfect. Listen, I was wondering whether you had something planned next Friday?”  
“No, I don’t. Why do you ask?”  
“My friends are coming over to my apartment for dinner and I wanted to know if you’d like to join us?”  
“Are you sure?”  
“Well, I was until now. It’s ok if you don’t want to come though.”  
“No Magnus, that’s not what I meant. I would love to meet your friends. I just… ok, I don’t want to have this conversation over the phone. Are you free for a coffee?”  
“Now?”  
“It’s Sunday morning, almost eleven, seems like as good a time as any, don’t you think?”  
“Sure.”  
“Great. Come over? I’ll prepare a pot in the meantime?”  
“Ok. See you in a few.”

Ever since their last meeting, with his family, Alec and Magnus had talked over the phone or by text messages, but hadn’t had the chance of seeing each other again. Magnus had seemed bother by Alec’s reaction at the prospect of meeting his friends. But this definitely wasn’t the issue. And Alec didn’t want to have this talk when he couldn’t see Magnus. Attitude sometimes spoke more than words and it was important for him to make sure that his message didn’t get lost.

Magnus arrived half an hour later. Alec opened the door to see a clearly worried Magnus standing behind it. 

“Hey, thanks for coming.” Before Magnus could answer, Alec dipped his hand and kissed him, just a peck, but a clear message that things were ok between them, at least on his side.  
“You sounded serious over the phone.”  
“I wouldn’t say serious, but I do think we need to have this conversation in person.”

Alec opened the door some more and Magnus crossed the threshold, and both men went to Alec’s living room.

“I’ll go grab the coffee and some cups. Make yourself comfortable.”

Alec prepared everything and went back to Magnus, who was patiently waiting for him but still looking extremely unsure of himself. 

“I’m sorry Magnus.”  
“Why are you apologizing?”  
“I seem to have worried you more than I ever wanted to.”  
“I’m not worried. More wary I’d say.”  
“That wasn’t my intention, at all. I need to make sure that we are on the same page.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“I might not be the best one in this department, so I don’t really know how to deal with all this. We’ve seen each other a few times for dates, you’ve met my family, I’ve met yours, and now I’m invited over to meet your friends. It seems rather official to me.”

Alec saw the moment Magnus understood where he was going with this. 

“You want to know where we’re standing.”  
“Kind of? I know where I am standing, but I don’t like to assume.”  
“And where are you standing?”  
“I’m seeing you. And only you, exclusively. I like spending time with you, and I like sharing things with you. And before I get to meet your friends, I would just want to know where you are.”  
“I’m exactly there with you Alexander. It’s true that we never really talked about anything. I am a one soul at a time kind of guy. Unless we very specifically say from the start that this is not what it is. But as far as I’m concerned, I would rather we remained as we are than anything else. I enjoy your company a lot too.”  
“Does that make us…”  
“Boyfriends?”  
“Yes?”  
“I think so. How are you feeling about that?”  
“Good. Really good actually. You?”  
“Really good too.”

As if to prove his point, Magnus got closer to Alec and dropped a kiss on his lips.

“So, now that this is settled, what do you say about coming next Friday?”  
“I’d love to. Tell me, who am I going to meet?”  
“Catarina is one of my closest friends. I met her in the foster system. We stayed in touch ever since. She’s married to Ragnor, who’s a grumpy yet adorable old man. Then there’s Raphael, who I met in the foster system too. Clary and Simon might pop in at some point.”  
“You’ve known your friends a long time.”  
“I have. They’ve been there with me for as long as I can remember. At least the good things.”  
“And they know about me?”  
“They know I met someone. I may not have mentioned getting a tattoo, because I didn’t want to get into the explanation of it all, not yet. But they know I’ve met someone who’s charming and who already knows Clary.”  
“Does this mean you don’t want to tell them how we met? I don’t mind, I just need to make sure I don’t say anything that would make you feel uncomfortable.”  
“It’s ok. They’ll have to know at some point anyway. And at least now it’s healed so I can show it to them without hearing Catarina complain about how dangerous it is and whether I paid attention to the sanitary conditions of the shop.”  
“We are very cautious on this.”  
“I know Alexander, and I wasn’t worried. Catarina is a nurse and she has seen her fair share of bad tattoo stories…”  
“I don’t even want to imagine. I saw my siblings fix some pretty nasty stuff.”  
“At least they were fixable. Catarina has seen surgeries and various other gore things because of infections. She’s very graphic in her descriptions.” 

Alec laughed at Magnus’ disgusted frown. They continued talking over coffee until Magnus informed Alec he had to leave for lunch.

“I usually have Sunday lunch with the Fray-Garroway household. We’ve tried to keep at least one meal together a week, to keep in touch. I’d like you to meet them too at some point. You already know half of them after all.”  
“Why not, in the future.”

Alec tried to keep his answer light and with a smile, but he felt a knot in his stomach at the thought of meeting Magnus’ parents. Friends were one thing, family – and even more parents – were something else. Something Alec wasn’t sure he was ready for. 

The week went by in a blur. Alec had a big appointment this week in the shop and it required a lot of time and concentration. So he barely had time to check in with Magnus. A text here and there but nothing more. On Thursday night, Alec decided to give Magnus a call, just to make sure they were still on for the following day.

“So everything is still ok for tomorrow night?”  
“Definitely. They will be arriving around 7pm, but you could come earlier if you’d like.”  
“I could. I finished early today with my client, and I only have a few touch ups to do tomorrow, so maybe I can drop by at your place around 5, if it’s ok with you?”  
“Perfect. That way you can help me prepare everything.”  
“If you think I might be of help, I’d be happy to. My knowledge in the kitchen is definitely less than yours though, so you’ll have to be patient.”  
“Don’t worry Darling, I’ll be gentle.”

The combination of the use of Darling and the potential meaning of the sentence got Alec to chuckle slightly. Magnus was a tease and ever since they had openly decided to be boyfriend, it appeared that he had decided not to hold anything back anymore.

When Alec arrived at Magnus’, the smell in the hallway was already making him hungry. In order to be sure to arrive early, Alec has skipped lunch, something he wasn’t used to doing. He knocked on the door and heard a faint “It’s open” so he entered the apartment.

“You know it could be anyone behind the door Magnus?”  
“I was expecting you Darling. What are the probabilities of someone else knocking on my door at the exact same time you’d told me you’d come?”  
“I don’t know. But it’s still not very safe. So, how can I be of help?”

Magnus guided Alec, asking him small things to help prepare the dish he had done for the night. Alec didn’t want to admit it out loud but he was getting a bit anxious about meeting Magnus’ friends. They were so important for him that this clearly was a test, even though maybe not a conscious one.

They were finished with dinner, and cuddled on the couch when another knock came on the door.

“It’s open.”  
“Magnus…”  
“What? It has to be them, again it’s just statistics.”

The door opened and Alec heard someone say.

“You know it could be anyone knocking on your door, Magnus?”

Alec whipped his head in Magnus’ direction and smirked at him.

“Ragnor please, as I’ve told Alexander here, the statistics are in my favor.”  
“Say that to the coroner’s office next time then.”  
“Oh, I missed you Ragnor.”

Magnus got up and welcomed his friends. He then proceeded to introduce Alec, who was feeling a little nervous under Ragnor and Catarina’s gaze.

“Hi Alec, it’s nice to meet you. Magnus can’t stop talking about this fabulous man he met. So much so that I was wondering whether you were true or not.”  
“Hi Catarina. I am. Real I mean, no judgement on the fabulous. It’s nice to meet you too.”

They moved to the dining room and Raphael arrived barely a few minutes later. They were in the middle of dinner when Catarina asked Alec how they had met.

“Hum…”  
“If this goes down the path: we were both drunk and I don’t really remember…”  
“Hush Ragnor, it’s not the beginning of every of my stories. You can tell them Alexander, it’s alright.”  
“Magnus came to my tattoo shop a few weeks ago. We hit it off.”  
“Magnus Bane, you got a tattoo?”  
“I did Catarina. And yes, I was extremely careful with the shop, I checked everything. And for your own knowledge, Alec’s shop is actually the place Clary goes to. Jace is Alec’s brother.”  
“Ok. So, what did you get? Because I reckon you saying at some point in your life that you wanted one to match the one of the she-devil. I can’t believe you dated her for so long. Please tell me she didn’t make you do this…”

Alec’s brow furrowed at that. They hadn’t really talked about their pasts yet. And in all honesty, Alec wasn’t sure he was ready to do so. 

“Catarina, I haven’t seen Camille in more than two years, I think we’re good.”  
“We never know with people like her. They creep in the shadows and jump back out when you least expect them.”  
“No, it wasn’t her. I got a tattoo to celebrate finally becoming myself.”

Magnus lifted his shirt to reveal the tattoo he had on his heart. Alec had seen him shirtless but the visual still made him appreciate the beauty that his boyfriend was. Catarina eyed the tattoo carefully.

“I have to admit it looks gorgeous.”  
“It does. Alexander here found the perfect design and etched it for ever.”  
“This probably means that you have some too Alec?”  
“Ha, some… his full upper body is filled with tattoos.”

Alec’s eyebrows rose into his hairline when Magnus said that. Of course, he had seen him shirtless that first day, and Alec knew Magnus had enjoyed the view, but it seemed that it was to an extent Alec hadn’t expected.

“Magnus let’s not get carried away please.”  
“Oh Ragnor, live a little. I just saw my dear Alexander here shirtless when I went to his shop and let’s just say the ink is not the only impressive thing.”  
“Dios, Magnus we’re trying to eat. No offense Alec.”  
“None taken Raphael. I do agree. To answer your question Catarina, yes I have many tattoos. My arms, chest, back and part of my legs. I avoid places I can’t hide though, like my hands, neck or face.”  
“You mean aside from the one peaking on the left side of your neck?”  
“Aside from this one yes.”

They continued the evening talking, reminiscing about younger days. Alec felt at ease with Magnus’ friends, even Raphael despite his gruff exterior. When they left, Alec stayed behind to help Magnus clean. Once they were done, they went back to the living room and sat on the couch.

“Thank you for inviting me Magnus, I had a lovely time with your friends.”  
“Thank you for coming. I’m glad you guys got along.”  
“Can I ask what type of tattoo you avoided getting?”  
“You caught that huh…”  
“I did. It’s ok if you don’t want to talk about it. I just love a good tattoo story is all. We don’t have to talk about anything else.”  
“She wanted us to have complementary tattoos. She wanted one half of the infinity design, and for me to wear the other half, so that when our arms would be touching, it’d make the whole sign.”  
“Lord, I’m so glad you didn’t do that.”  
“Judgmental, are we?”

Alec realized Magnus’ tone was a bit on edge, so he explained why he didn’t like the idea. It wasn’t the matching tattoo part that was driving him crazy, but rather everything around it.

“That’s why I’m glad you didn’t do it Magnus. But you’re right. I am no one to judge. I know what I don’t want on my body but it doesn’t mean that it’s the same for everyone.”  
“I’m glad too Alexander, don’t get me wrong. Camille is a touchy subject.”  
“Are you still friends?”  
“Oh no. I avoid her like the plague. Which isn’t that hard nowadays since she moved to Europe a year ago or so. She made my life miserable. She hated my friends and they hated her back.”  
“She’s the she-devil right?”  
“That’s their nickname for her yes. She did hurt me real deep. Made me question who I was. All the choices I had made. She basically wanted to change everything about me. Including my friends. And the worst is I almost let her do it. At the time, it broke me to find her in bed with someone else, but now, I am so thankful she did that.”  
“I’m sorry Magnus, this mustn’t have been easy.”  
“It happens, right? Who hasn’t been cheated on?”

Alec didn’t answer at that, because it had never happened to him. He just nodded his head as in agreement and let Magnus go on.

“I was with her for around five years I think. I really thought we would get married and share our lives together. When people say you’re blind when you’re in love, they are so right. I think I was clinging to hard to the ideal of a family in a house with a white picket fence that I overlooked many things. She was manipulative and abusive and I let her do all of this just because I clung to a dream. She was my first real relationship, one that lasted more than a few months, and one I could see become something more. But she turned out to be the worst relationship I ever was in.”  
“I’m sorry Magnus. Not that it didn’t work because I would never have met you otherwise, but because she hurt you. You don’t deserve to be hurt, no one does. And believe it or not, I understand what you mean. Jace is waiting for his perfect dream too.”  
“I just hope that at some point, I’ll be lucky to find someone to share my life with, and create a stable environment for a family. Sorry, this is probably a lot to hear, considering we’ve been dating for a few days…”  
“I think we’re all hoping for this. So no Magnus, it’s not a lot to hear. And never be afraid of telling me what’s on your mind. I want you to be true to who you are when you’re with me. And that includes talking about the future. We can be boyfriends and friends at the same time. I hear from my parents that it’s the best solution, and they’ve been together for the last 35 years.”  
“I’d like that Alexander, being friends too sounds like a good thing, I agree.”

They talked some more, about their expectations for the future and where they would like their lives to go. It turned out that they shared a lot of hopes for their future selves and it felt nice and warm to talk about it. Until Magnus asked the question Alec had been dreading the whole night.

“But enough about me. What about you Darling?”  
“What do you mean?”  
“I’ve told you all about my past relationships. What about you?”  
“Not much to tell.”  
“You’ve had relationships before, haven’t you?”  
“Yes Magnus. I have. But there’s nothing… I don’t…”

Alec got more and more agitated as words fumbled from his mouth. He wasn’t ready. He couldn’t talk about this, not yet. He stiffened next to Magnus and took a deep breath.

“Listen Magnus, I can’t talk about this. I’m sorry because you’ve told me about your history and I can’t reciprocate. I don’t talk about it, with anyone. Yes, I dated people. Yes I had a serious relationship. No it didn’t end well, I wouldn’t be here either today if it had.”

Alec’s words didn’t carry any venom in them, but they clearly weren’t nice either. It was a clear message that he wouldn’t be talking about it.

“I’m sorry Magnus. I think I’m gonna go. I don’t… I don’t want to say things that I’ll regret. I’m not ready to talk about all this.”

Alec stood up and left Magnus’ apartment. He found himself in the streets and took a deep breath of fresh air. What a hypocrite he was. After all his talk about being friends, Alec couldn’t even get words out about his past. 

But that was still such a hard thing to do. No matter how long it had been, the pain was still overwhelming whenever he talked about it. Very few people knew the integrity of Alec’s story, aside from his parents and siblings, only Logan shared his past. The need to have a clean state had been extremely important to Alec. He didn’t want to think about it anymore. He didn’t want to dwell on the what ifs. He couldn’t live his life lie this. So he had put a parenthesis around those years, and pretended like they never happened. Of course, he still had scars that reminded him of it. 

Alec walked quietly home, letting his mind wander and think about anything it wanted to. The barriers he usually had into place had fallen down and his memory was showing him things he had no interest in viewing. 

Once inside his apartment, Alec decided he might have to do something about it. But not tonight. Tonight, he would let the memories flood him. Tonight, he would suffer through them again. And tomorrow would be a new day. 

Alec looked at the time and it clearly was too late for him to call anyone. He would deal with this one his own for now. And tomorrow he would ask his family on how to make things right.

Hurting Magnus had never been something he thought he’d do. But it had been obvious on the other man’s face that Alec’s words had hurt him deeply. And Alec understood that. After opening up the whole night and revealing his past, the minimum he had expected from Alec was to do the same. But it hadn’t happened. Instead of a mature, open talk, Alec had closed up and let his fears take over. He had once again let his past take away his future.

Alec got into bed that night, afraid of having ruined everything with Magnus. Afraid of having destroyed a possible beautiful thing just because he couldn’t let go of his past. Maybe the night would help him, tell him what to do and how to act. He would have to apologize to Magnus at some point, this he was sure about. But apologizing also meant revealing everything and was it something Alec would ever be ready to do?


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec asks for advice on how to deal with the mess he's made. Finally, Magnus and him get to talk, at least begin to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> This chapter is a harsh one, I apologize. And the next one is probably going to be even worse. But we're reaching the end of the bad/angsty stuff. I promise it's going to get better!
> 
> Now, I have a question for you once you've read it: do you prefer if I update over the weekend instead of next Wednesday since it'll be Christmas and all; or would you rather wait until next Wednesday or the Friday after that? I don't mind either way, I'm on vacation Friday at 3pm, for 2 whole weeks so I can update any time :)
> 
> As usual, you can talk to me on here or on twitter @caronahya
> 
> Here we go...

Alec woke up with a heavy head. He had slept almost the whole night without waking up but his dreams had been less than pleasant. He got up and went for breakfast. Soon followed a shower and then he grabbed his phone and dialed.

“Hey Alec.”

“Hi Logan. How are you?”

“I’m good but I’m guessing this isn’t a social call. It’s 10am on a Saturday Alec. What’s wrong?”

“Am I a bad person for wanting to move on?”

“Oh Alec, no. Please don’t think that. You deserve to move on. Care to tell me what happened?”

So Alec explained. How he had met Magnus. How he had been attracted to him. How they had started dating until they made it official a few days ago. The more Alec talked about it, the heavier he felt, because everything was so conflicting. Logan, as usual, listened and let Alec finish what he had to say.

“Listen Alec, I believe you’re thinking too much.”

“It’s not like I have a switch that I can turn off.”

“You never could do that, could you? Seriously, you have to convince yourself. It’s time to move on. It’s been long enough. And if you need to hear it: it’s ok for you to move on. It’s ok for you to want to move on.”

“I’m scared Logan.”

“I know you are Alec. But you can’t let your past get in the middle of your present. That’s not healthy.”

“You’re right. Consciously, I know you are. But then I…”

“You get lost in your own head.”

“Yes.”

“Try to think of it that way: if it were the other way around, would you be offended?”

“I wouldn’t.”

“Then why are you?”

They went on talking for a while and hung up with the promise of another call soon. Calling Logan had helped, but he needed another point of view. Logan, despite being in his present, still constituted his past and maybe it was better to have another view. He grabbed his coat and went to his parents’ house, after sending a quick text to his mom saying he wanted to talk to her.

“Mom, you there?”

“Hi Alec, yes I’m the kitchen.”

“Smells good.”

“I’ve made you pie.”

“Love you Mom.”

“So, you said you wanted to talk. I made pie, we have coffee. Tell me, my boy, what’s wrong?”

“I’ve met someone.”

“I would say that’s great but judging by your lack of enthusiasm I’m guessing there’s something wrong. Is he married?”

“No, he’s single and interested. Remember Magnus, the guy I tattooed? That’s him. We are together. Or we were, I don’t really know anymore.”

“What happened?”

“We had dinner at his place with friends of his. They were nice and we got to talking and they mentioned one of his exes. After they left, we got to talking some more and he told me about this woman he dated. And then, he asked about my own dating history.”

“Oh Alec. What did you say?”

“I panicked. I didn’t know what to do or say. So I just cut the conversation short and kind of left?”

“Sweetheart, you have nothing to be ashamed of. And nothing to be afraid of.”

“I still feel like I’m cheating.”

“Come here.”

Maryse made a motion for Alec to get to her and as soon as he was within her reach, she grabbed him and hugged him.

“Alec, you are not cheating. Your past is your past, as dark as it is. You are your own person. You owe nothing, to no one.”

“Thanks Mom. I talked to Logan about it too.”

“What did he say?”

“Kinda the same. He’s told me it’s ok to move on.”

“Of course it is Alec. It’s been years.”

“I know that. But I can’t shake the feelings I have.”

“You deserve happiness Alec. Do you want my advice?”

“Please Mom.”

“Go talk to Magnus. Tell him your story. It’s more than time that you allow yourself some more happiness. And if you think Magnus could make you happy, then you should definitely give it a try. But I don’t think it’s healthy to embark on a relationship when one of the parties is blindsided. He deserves to know. And it will help him understand. And it will help you realize that what you’re doing is perfectly normal.”

“Thanks Mom. I will call him.”

“You know Alec, I used to worry when you were younger. I was scared that things would be difficult for you because society isn’t always the kindest. I feared that you would get judged and be left on the side for who you were – are. I watched you grow and you made me so proud Alec. You are everything a mother wishes for her child to be: you’re kind, you’re clever, of course you’re beautiful. Seeing you happy was the greatest gift you could ever give me. Don’t get me wrong though. I am glad I could be there for you when you needed me. And I would do it all again without a second thought. But now, I just want to see my boy smile again. And not that sad smile you have. But your real, eyes sparkling, head thrown back laugh. You deserve so much Alec.”

“I love you Mom. Can I stay with you a little longer?”

“I don’t have anything planned this morning. What do you say we bring this pie and coffee in the living room and enjoy some stupid shows for a while?”

“I’d love that.”

Alec followed his mom and they spent the day watching shows and eating junk food. They didn’t do it often but Alec enjoyed those moments shared with her. Their relationship had always been good and Alec had found it extremely helpful to be able to confide in her and ask her for advice. When the evening came, and his dad got back home, Alec bid them goodbye and went back to his own apartment. He grabbed his phone and called Magnus.

“Hi Magnus, it’s Alec.”

“Hi Alec. How can I help you?”

Alec was a bit put off by Magnus’ tone but he decided he deserved it. He tried to put it aside and went on.

“I was wondering if you’d be free for dinner?”

“Tonight?”

“Yes?”

“No I can’t I’m sorry. I’m working tonight.”

“Oh, ok. Are you free any evening this week?”

“I don’t think I am. I don’t have my schedule with me but I think my whole week is full. We’re short-staffed at the moment and I really need to be there all the time.”

“It’s ok, I understand. Well, good luck for your job I guess, talk to you soon.”

“Thanks. Bye.”

Alec had expected some coldness after their last meeting. But this wasn’t helping his nerves. Thinking back about it, Alec decided the least he could do was give Magnus some time, and then try to win him back. He might have screwed up, but he wanted to give it a try, a real one. So he waited. He didn’t get in touch with Magnus at all, until the following Friday. In the middle of the afternoon, Alec sent him a quick text message.

**Hi Magnus, I hope you’re not too exhausted with work. Listen, I want to apologize and explain, but I’d rather not do it over the phone, it’s kind of a long story. Would you be free for dinner? Or lunch? Over the weekend? Just let me know ok?**

Alec just went to bed and hoped he’d get an answer the following day. But no answer came. He checked his phone and saw that the message was marked as read but no answer. Since it was Sunday and Alec wasn’t working, he decided to do something he’d put off for so long.

He went to the back of his apartment and grabbed all the boxes in his closet. He had approximately ten of them, filled with memories and tokens he had wanted to keep at some point. Some were for his own good, some because he didn’t want to forget and some he didn’t really know why anymore.

He opened the first box and was assaulted with images. Memories flooded him and it was becoming harder to stay clear-headed. Despite his prior motivation, Alec was finding it extremely difficult to be objective and at the bottom of the first box, he realized that he had only put aside a few things.

This wasn’t working. He couldn’t do it like that. He went to his kitchen and made a huge pot of coffee. He then got dressed in sportswear and after a cup, went for a run. He came back home an hour later, exhausted and went for a shower.

Now his mind was better focused. He resumed his task and managed to go through four boxes in the span of an hour. The things he found in the boxes brought so many souvenirs back, of places he’d visited, of trips he’d taken. At some point, he even wondered why he had decided to keep some of them. Sure, they had belonged to his past, but there were of no use to his present. Some even didn’t make sense anymore, to the point where he wondered why he had those.

He decided to separate everything into categories: things he would throw away, things he could give and things he would keep. Many items ended in the “give” pile, but most in the “throw away”. Out of those four boxes, he decided to keep a small bag. Before he could change his mind, he grabbed everything else and went to dispose of it.

The mixture of guilt and relief was a strange combination, but Alec knew he had to do this. If he wanted to move on, he had to let go of his past. The objects had been his way of trying to remain the same, but in the end, they had locked him in. And he needed out. Because staying in the past wouldn’t make things go back to the way they were. There was no way it could happen.

He was brewing yet another pot of coffee when his phone pinged.

**Hey Alec, I saw your text but I was still overloaded at work. You don’t owe me any explanation. I just felt hurt when, after telling my past, you wouldn’t reciprocate. I’ve talked to Clary about it, and let’ just say that she basically took your side. I am free today if you are? Just let me know.**

Alec read the message again and sent a quick answer.

**Hi Magnus, I am. I’m at home right now if you want to come over? I could make us lunch? Or order in, probably a better idea. Anyway, whatever works for you, I’m not moving from home at all.**

Alec hit send before he could it yet another time and Magnus answered barely a minute later saying he was grabbing his coat and would be on his way. Alec did a quick tour of the place to be sure that everything was clean and tidy and when he was happy with how it looked, he went back to his couch with another cup of coffee and waited. Magnus arrived a few minutes later.

When Alec opened the door, he didn’t really know how to act so he just decided to follow his gut and hugged Magnus. He felt the other man a bit stiff in his embrace but soon his arms snaked around Alec and hugged him back.

“Thank you for coming Magnus.”

“You were pretty insistent. And Clary made some valid points. So…”

“I’ll have to thank your sister then. But first, I need to apologize to you. The way I reacted last time we saw each other wasn’t fair to you. After you’d opened up and told me your story, I should have at least given you an answer. But see, my past is dark and I’m still stuck in it. I want it to change. You make me want to change it. I have been single for the last four years, give or take.”

“There’s nothing wrong with being a no-strings attached kind of guy. Or are you scared of involvement?”

“Neither. I have had one serious relationship that lasted six years.”

“That’s a long time.”

“It was.”

“Why did it end?”

Alec knew that was the reason Magnus had come, to hear his story. He seldom talked about it. Only his siblings knew the full extent. His parents had been shielded a bit but they knew the outcome. All his family had been there for him but it would be the first time Alec told this story to someone outside of his inner circle.

“Listen Magnus. I’m going to tell you my story. But I want you to know that you are the first person I tell it to. My family knows, of course. But I haven’t told anyone. I guess I just wasn’t ready. I hadn’t found someone who made me want to be ready. It’s funny, you know. I had decided that I was perfectly fine with being just a one-night kind of guy. I didn’t want more. I am terrified of getting attached. I am terrified of getting hurt again.”

“I’m sorry Alec. You don’t have to tell me the whole story if you don’t want to.”

“But that’s the thing Magnus. I want to tell you. Because I want us to try and be more. Because for the first time in years, I feel like taking that risk of getting in a relationship. I don’t want you to be just another random night. I haven’t called anyone my boyfriend in so many years. But I didn’t want to. This spot was already taken.”

“What’s his name?”

“Will. His name was Will.”

Alec felt tears coming to his eyes. He hadn’t said that name out loud in so long. He hadn’t realized he had closed his eyes until he felt Magnus’ hand on his back, rubbing slow circles.

“Listen Alec, I want to know your story, but you can take your time. You don’t have to tell me everything today.”

“You’re right. I don’t have to. But I want to. I talked with my mom about it and she’s right. I can’t ask you to enter this relationship if I’m not upfront from the start.”

“You talked to your mom? About me?”

“I’m really close with my mother. She has always been there for me, supporting me and helping me become the person I am today. So yes, she’s one of the persons I turn to when I need advice. She also happens to be in a serious, stable and loving relationship with my dad so I can’t think of anyone more suited to help me out.”

“That’s nice. To have someone you can rely on like that.”

“It is. She also shakes me when I need to, don’t get me wrong. It’s not just cuddling.”

“Wouldn’t be a mother if it weren’t so.”

“I guess. Before I tell you my story Magnus, I want you to know that I’m badly damaged, and I don’t only mean mentally.”

Ever since the accident, or more accurately the recovery, Alec had had the habit of running his hands up and down his thighs whenever he was getting nervous about something. The motion usually calmed him or helped him focus.

Could he really do this? Could he tell his story to Magnus and see… what he expected to see in Magnus’ eyes wasn’t clear. He was afraid of pity. He also feared disgust and shame.

“Alexander, what do you say we move this discussion to the kitchen? I feel like we’ll be comfortable with some food in our systems. What do you say?”

Alec knew Magnus was just trying to get him to relax. He was grateful for it even. So he nodded and they moved to the kitchen.

“Is it ok with you if I open the cupboards and everything to find what to make for lunch?”

“Of course Magnus. But we can also order in. I didn’t invite you over so you’d cook.”

“Don’t worry about it, I love cooking. Do you want to help?”

“I can try.”

“That’s all I ask.”

Alec watched Magnus move in his kitchen, open the various cabinets until he located whatever he deemed ok for lunch. They moved wordlessly in the kitchen and Alec knew Magnus was just giving him time. But at some point, he would have to speak. Might as well rip the band-aid off.

“Before becoming a tattoo artist, I was a photographer. I also used to draw a lot, that’s actually my major, arts.”

Alec started to talk and Magnus let the words flow. He only nodded or smiled to acknowledge that he was following. It was easier to be doing it like this, he had been right. Possibly because Alec couldn’t see anything else than the reactions Magnus wanted him to see.

“You know I’m close with my siblings, but I had a best friend all my years in school and even after. His name is Logan. It used to be just the two of us against the world. If I had had a third brother, it would have been him. We were so similar. We are still in touch. But everything is different now. He lives in California, he needed the change in scenery. I wouldn’t call him my best friend anymore, because life made us drift apart.”

Alec took a moment to breathe. Both men were just standing near the stove, the food cooking by itself. So Alec took Magnus’ hands in his and led him to the kitchen table. He made him sit and sat opposite. Alec never let go of Magnus’ hands. Whether it was for Magnus’ benefit of his own, Alec wasn’t sure. But he enjoyed the feeling and didn’t want to let go. It was a way to keep himself grounded. Alec felt magnus fingers close around his own. He lifted his head and Alec could see Magnus’ questioning eyes. There was no impatience in them, just real concern. 

“I grew up in Manhattan, with my siblings and my parents. My story mostly looks perfect from the start. I get along with my siblings, I get along with my parents. They actually were extremely supportive when I came out. Which didn’t really happen, I mean, we were just talking and I casually commented on something that made my preference obvious and that was it. I told my mom about my first boyfriend. We talked for hours about it. We talked about feelings, and about how things could go or not. We also talked about sex. Of course unwanted pregnancy was never an issue with me, though I heard her talk a lot about it with Iz and Jace. But we still talked about it, about consent, desire and safe sex. My first boyfriend didn’t happen to be my first time. My first time came a little while later. And in retrospect, I am so glad I had had all those talks with my mom, because I didn’t feel bad for how it happened. My first time was a one night stand. A guy I had met during a party at a friend’s house. I had never felt attracted to someone as how I felt to him. This would turn out to be changed when I met you but it’s another story. So we danced, spent the night talking, one thing led to another and we parted ways in the morning. I never saw him again. I told my mom the following day. She just asked me if we had been safe and if I was happy. Which I was. My life before Will had been easy, and comfortable. I met Will middle of senior year in high school. He was transferring for the remaining months and we got stuck together. Funnily enough, we didn’t start dating then. It took us a while to get there. But things were great. I was so happy. I was also so in love. We stayed together for six years. I was planning on proposing.”

Alec took a breath to try and steady himself. Talking about his mom first had been his way of getting comfort without her being in the room. But at some point, he had to go through the remaining of his story. Through those last ten years.

“Alexander, it’s ok. You don’t have to tell me everything. Thank you for sharing this with me but I can wait for when you’re ready. Or we can just say that Will was a part of your past and leave it at that.”

“No Magnus. You need to know. I told you, it’s more than just a story, it had consequences and I still bear the mark of those today. So I was planning on proposing to Will, everything was ready, the setup, the ring. Everything. And then…”


	7. Chapter 7 - Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec's story. The reasons he is who is today.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> I know it's neither the right day, nor the right time BUT:   
> \- I want to post ahead of Christmas because I'm gonna be cooking and baking for 3 days,   
> \- I don't want you to read this one close to Christmas because you're not gonna be happy,   
> \- I want to post it before leaving the house to run errands to I don't see you screaming at me :D
> 
> This chapter is the one I wrote after chapter 1. It's Alec's story and it explains everything. It's not an easy chapter, at least it wasn't from a writer's point of view. 
> 
> I welcome any kind of criticism on this, and if you want to scream at me, I'll listen and remind you that all my stories have a happy ending. But I'll understand.
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> I am so glad we're finally reaching this point, it's probably one of the hardest thing I ever had to write and I can't wait to hear what y'all think about it.
> 
> Let's go!

“Alec, the headmaster wants to see you.”  
“Me? Why? What did I do?”  
“I don’t know, don’t ask me.”

Alex begrudgingly went to the office and knocked on the door. He entered when asked to and went near the desk, to see that another student was also there. Alec had never seen him before, maybe he was in another year. Or maybe he was a senior too. Alec didn’t really pay attention to people in general. He had his group of friends and liked to remain far away from high school drama.

“Ah, Mister Lightwood. Glad you could join us. Let me introduce you to William Jones. He will be joining your class today and for the remaining of the year. Since we’re only a few months away from graduation, I felt it would be best if he had sort of a tutor, if you’d like, to help him navigate the school and find his marks as soon as possible. And your name was the first to come to mind. So, what do you think?”

Alec looked at the other student, who had an apologetic smile on his face. Alec knew, as well as William, that he didn’t really have a choice, despite what the headmaster had said.

“Sure, Headmaster Davidson, I can help with that.”  
“Perfect. You gentlemen have an almost identical schedule, so it should be easy to work on that Mr Lightwood. Mr Jones, Alexander here is one of our top students. He will help you with all kind of questions you might have. I have arranged for you both to skip first period so you can meet and discuss everything. Do you gentlemen have any questions?”

A chorus of “No sir” was heard, to which the headmaster nodded and left to accompany them to the door.

Alec left the room, followed by William, who looked worried.

“I’m sorry you got trapped into that. I told my parents I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.”  
“Don’t worry about it, I don’t mind. So William, what should I know about you?”  
“First, that nobody calls me William.”

Alec chuckled at that, he did have the exact same predicament.

“Heard you. I know the problem first hand. Everybody calls me Alec.”  
“Good to know Alec, I go by Will.”  
“Great. So Headmaster Davidson said we had similar schedule, do you know where you want to go next year?”  
“I want to study renovation of artefacts. I’d love to be a curator. What about you?”  
“Nothing that fancy. I want to study arts. I love to draw. I also happen to love photography and I’d like to be able to combine both? Like go on trips to capture stunning images with my cameras and then get back home and paint those. And worst case I can sell the pictures if I’m no good at drawing.”  
“That’s cool. Do you know which places you’d like to visit?”  
“Asia, for sure. So many countries there, so close yet so different. I want to get to know how people who live there really live. Same for South America and probably Antarctica.”  
“That’s a plan. Your parents are ok with it?”  
“They are. They are pretty open minded for parents.”  
“That’s cool. Mine are not so happy with my choice, but they have to deal with it. I really don’t see myself working in their law firm.”  
“Same, my dad’s a doctor too and I wouldn’t follow in his footsteps.”

Alec bonded with Will easily. They had a lot in common and soon became friends. Alec introduced him to his siblings, who were in senior and junior years and to his friends. Logan often joked that Will had been the missing piece to their group. 

They finished high school and moved on to university. Will, Logan and Alec had all been accepted in the same one. They decided to rent a place together, instead of being in a dorm. Seeing as they were three, it made a lot of sense. They could find a nice place with three bedrooms and cut the price of the rent into three. Logan wasn’t majoring in arts so Will and Alec would usually find themselves in discussion where Logan would feel a bit left out. 

Alec hated that his best friend was slowly drifting apart from him, so he tried to make up for it. Some nights they would spend their evening playing video games and just chat about nothing while doing so.

A year in their arrangement, Logan had to leave for a few months, for his internship. Will and Alec decided to keep the place anyway, because the rent wasn’t that expensive, and clearly, neither of them wanted to move.

With Logan gone, things took a different turn. They became closer, and started talking more and more about everything, and not just arts. But it was different than Alec’s talks with Logan, more intimate, more specific. Unknowingly, both young men started to develop crushes, that moved on to feelings. But none of them said anything, by fear of breaking the charm. Until one evening, after dinner, in front of their favorite tv show to watch.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad Chandler and Monica are together. I just think it’s a shame that friends have to get drunk to realize they want to bang.”  
“It’s not, really. I understand it. I’m not sure I would take the risk to do something and lose one of my best friends over it.”  
“I see your point Will. But isn’t it worse not to try and never know?”  
“You really think that?”   
“I really do. Because if this person truly is one of your best friends, then you would talk it out and ok maybe things might be awkward for a while if they don’t reciprocate but…”

Before he could finish his sentence, Alec felt Will’s lips on his. He hadn’t been expected this. They had been friends, great friends, for years. And sure, Will was a handsome man but Alec had no idea he was attracted to him. When Alec didn’t respond to the kiss, Will moved back.

“I’m sorry Alec. You just…”  
“Don’t apologize Will. I told you to do it in a way.”  
“I guess I saw more in your sentence that you meant to put in it.”  
“You did. But I didn’t say it was a bad thing, did I?”

Alec smiled and moved back in. They kissed, slowly, hesitantly, for a few minutes, until Alec retreated again.

“Maybe we should talk about it? I don’t know. It feels like something we should talk about.”  
“Ok. I guess my side is pretty obvious. I like you Alec. You’re beautiful, inside and out. You’re kind and selfless and one of the best person I’ve ever known.”  
“Wow. I had no idea you felt that way. Why didn’t you say something sooner?”  
“Well, I don’t know. I think I kinda always felt like you were just waiting for Logan…”  
“Logan?! Urgh, he’s my best friend. Nothing else. He will never be nothing else. I grew up with him, he’s like a brother.”  
“I joined you we were already 17 Alec. I had no idea. And we never really talked about it because I couldn’t really bring it up with the two of you now, Could I? But it doesn’t really matter. The real question is whether this is something you might want to consider?”  
“I think I gave you a clue a little, didn’t I? I did just kiss you too. I just want to know what you are looking for. A friends with benefits? A one-night thing? A relationship?”  
“If I’m being honest, I’ll take what you’re ready to give me. I really like you Alec. Relationship-like like. I really want us to try and be… something together.”  
“Ok.”  
“Ok?”  
“Yes. You’re one of my closest friends. You’re someone I trust, no second thought. We have many tastes in common. It makes sense to try.”  
“I love your logical sense Alec, so romantic.”  
“Shut up and kiss me.”

Their dating start was easy. They just added another layer to their friendship. A few months in their relationship, and before Logan returned from his internship, they decided to share a room in the apartment and turn the other one in an office.

Logan came back and decided it was time for him to move out. After all, they were almost done with college and soon they’d be moving on to their professional lives. Alec and Will remained in the apartment until their degree was finished. Then they moved out and went to travel the world, just like Alec had planned. Will was happy to come along and visit museums while Alec would take pictures and draw. 

They spent a whole two years globe trotting, enjoying everything. When they came back, they moved into a new apartment in New York. Things were going good. Will was going on well with Alec’s parents. Their relationship was stable, their jobs successful. They couldn’t really have hoped for better.

To celebrate their return to the mother land, they decided to go out and celebrate. Logan, who was in town too, was invited to tag along. The three of them took the car and went to a restaurant near the beach. Jace, Isabelle and Meliorn took another one. The weather was still nice in September and Alec wanted to use this time to take some shots of the ocean. He wanted those shots because he wanted to get everything ready. He had decided that once they’d be back, he’d propose to Will. The six of them had dinner at a restaurant on the pier and when it became time to go home, they all went back in their cars and on the road.

Alec never saw it happen. They were talking, he couldn’t even remember about what, and then everything went dark. He couldn’t say how long it remained dark. He remembered opening his eyes and seeing lights, so many lights around them. He could see the driver seat completely smashed in front of him. He could see the passenger seat crushed too. He himself was in the back and what struck him was how impossible it was for him to move. He heard a voice near him, telling him to remain calm and that they were being taken care of. Alec wanted to fight and keep his eyes open. He couldn’t see much but a lot of blood. So much blood, everywhere.

The next time Alec opened his eyes, he was in a hospital bed. Isabelle was in a chair next to the bed, while Jace was standing at the foot of it.

“Hey Alec.”  
“What happened Iz?”  
“What do you remember?”  
“Nothing, it’s all dark. I remember blood, so much blood. Oh my god, how are Will and Logan?”  
“Alec, we need to call the doc first to let him know you’re awake.”  
“Iz, answer me. How are they?”  
“Alec, the doctor wants to do assessments before we give you any information. I’m so sorry.”

Alec was feeling restless but he let his sister go and fetch the doctor. After all, she was just following protocol and Alec liked protocols.

“Mr Lightwood, I’m glad to see you’re awake.”  
“How long was I out?”  
“Two days.”  
“Two days?! What happened?”  
“Can you tell me what you remember?”  
“We were driving home with my boyfriend and my best friend. Then everything’s black. I remember opening my eyes and seeing blood, a lot of it. And then I woke up here and no one will tell me what happened to my boyfriend and my friend.”  
“Mr Lightwood I asked your family not to tell you anything. You were in a car crash. A truck driver ran into your car. It hit the driver’s seat first and then the passenger seat. You, in the back seat, were less impacted because the tires didn’t touch you. You have a broken leg, as well as second degree burns on both your thighs. They will need time to heal and you will have scars. They won’t be pretty but we did our best.”  
“What. About. My. Friends?”  
“I’m sorry Mr Lightwood. The truck run over the car. The driver, Mr Jones, was killed on the spot. As for the passenger, Mr Gray, he is in an ICU room not far from here. His injuries are serious. He won’t be able to walk again. I’m sorry to be the bearer of such news.”

Alec couldn’t breathe. How was it possible? How could one second change everything? Will was dead? Will was dead. Alec just screamed and started to push the covers down to try and get out of bed. That’s when he saw the bandages on his legs. He couldn’t even move because one of them was strapped to the bed. The bandages took all the front of his thighs.

“Mr Lightwood. I can’t imagine the pain you must be in right now, but I need you to calm down. I’m sorry, I truly am. I’m going to leave you with your family. But you need to try and calm down. If you can’t do it on your own, I will have to come back with a sedative.”

As soon as the doctor was out, Isabelle rushed to her brother and hugged him.

“Alec, I’m so sorry. We were just behind you, and I saw the truck and then the car was gone and I thought I would never see you again.”  
“Is he really dead Iz?”  
“His parents came yesterday. They couldn’t stay. They told us to ask you to call them when you want. They would like to stay in touch with you.”  
“What about Logan?”  
“I visited him in the ICU. He’s as ok as can be. He was mostly worried about you now.”  
“What am I gonna do Iz? I was gonna ask him to marry me. He’s gone. I will never see him again.”

Alec stayed in the hospital for three weeks. After those, he was allowed to go home and continue his physical therapy in a daycare center. His parents insisted that he moved back with them so that they could help him. Alec complied. Above all, he didn’t want to go back to their apartment. The following months, Alec barely survived. He would wake up, eat, go to therapy, shower and go to bed. And repeat.

Isabelle took care of getting his things back to their parents’ house. She got in touch with Will’s parents so they could pick up their sons’ belongings. Alec had kept in touch with Logan, who was still in a hospital. He had too much to learn again and contrary to Alec, he didn’t really have a strong family support.

Alec wanted to stay in touch with him. He really tried. But each time he saw Logan, he could picture the accident again, and the blood which he now knew was both Logan and Will’s. So they became distant. Never really saw each other again. Talked over the phone, just to make sure the other one was dealing with everything. At first once a month, then every two months, until it was just a call here and there.

It hurt too much. Alec couldn’t deal with the pain of loss and the guilt he felt. Because if it hadn’t been for him, Will would still be alive. If it hadn’t been for him, Logan would still be able to walk. And instead of being stuck in one of his parents’ guest rooms, he’d be happily married.

Of course, because of his injuries, traveling the word wasn’t an option anymore. He could still draw, but the inspiration wasn’t the same. He didn’t really know what to do with his life. Here he was, a 27 year old man, living in his parents’ house and waiting for who knows what. One day, after PT, he came home to find his whole family waiting for him.

“Everything ok?”  
“Yes sweetheart, but we need to talk.”  
“Ok?”  
“Listen, we know those last months have been hard on you. No one here can imagine the loss you’ve suffered. But you can’t just waste your life. William wouldn’t have wanted that.”  
“Really? How do you know what Will would have wanted huh?”  
“Alec, no need to get defensive. Your mother was just trying to tell you that, despite the pain, life still goes on. We love having you with us, but it’s not an answer.”  
“So what? You’re gonna throw me out?”

When no answer came, Alec let out a dark chuckle.

“My god you are. Let me pack my things and I’ll be out of your way.”  
“Alec no. We are not throwing you out. But you must understand that as a parent, I can’t stand there and just watch you survive instead of living. I’m sorry you lost your boyfriend Alec. I’m sorry your best friend is still a reminiscence of it all. But you need to move forward son. Change. Evolve. It’s been two years Sweetheart.”  
“I know Mom. I know.”  
“Listen Alec, Jace and I were talking. We’d really like you to train and be a part of the team.”  
“In the shop Iz?”  
“Yes brother. I mean, you know how to draw, you have a lot of imagination and your designs are so creative. It would take you a few months to learn how to do it but then you could be an official part of it.”  
“I was thinking about it too.”  
“You Jace? Thinking?”  
“Don’t be a jerk Alec. Yes I was thinking, maybe it’s time we do something about those scars of yours. Trust me Alec. I have the perfect pattern to cover them. Scar tissues are a challenge but seeing people watch themselves with a new look in their eyes is everything. I mean, you already have my ink over you chest and arms so why not?”

After this talk with his family, Alec took a few weeks to gather his thoughts and then decided it was indeed time for him to try and move on. He registered for a tattoo training. And he specialized in scar tissues and scars in general. 

Jace talked to him about detailed anatomy-like tattoos on his legs but Alec didn’t want to cover them too much. He didn’t want to feel disgusted any time he saw them but he wanted to keep the reminder. So they opted for some geometrical designs, scattered on his thighs, with no real pattern. It felt better. To see his legs without seeing only the scars.

His training lasted a few months and then Alec moved into his own place and started working with Isabelle and Jace in the shop. He tried to remain in touch with Logan. They would get on the phone every now and then, but they never really managed to get their friendship back. Alec still felt too guilty over everything. And Logan didn’t really know how to handle all of this.

At first, Alec tried to work with everyone, but he soon realized that it was difficult. Staying in a still position for too long wasn’t something he could do easily anymore. He would get cramps on his legs that would force him to change positions. He also had a lot of trouble seeing people enter their shop on a whim, asking for something they would regret in a few months. Or people who would want the same pattern they had seen on hundreds of different people. 

In a way, Alec wanted his tattoos to be like his pictures and drawings, unique. So they talked with Jace and Isabelle. Alec could handle some part of the administrative tasks of the shop, and tattoo specific clients. 

After a while, he built a reputation. Artists working on scars, and doing it well, weren’t an easy thing to find. He took the room at the end of the shop, because he never worked on walk-ins. Because those weren’t the people he wanted to work with. He needed a story. He needed something more. 

He turned his love for drawing and art in a love for making people feel better about themselves. In the same way his family had done for him. Grieving for William had been hard, possibly the hardest thing Alec hoped he’d ever have to do in the next decades, and he wasn’t really quite there yet, but he was on the right path. He never had a relationship after William. He couldn’t. So he went to bars and had meaningless encounters with strangers. It wasn’t perfect, but it was something.

His family tried to make him. They tried to find eligible bachelors that he would probably have found attractive or interesting before William. But Alec wasn’t ready. He didn’t know if he would ever be. And he was ok with that. His family was having a harder time getting there, but as weeks and then months passed, they accepted his choice.

Things found a new rhythm. Alec was finally enjoying working with his siblings. Seeing his parents often, being mostly in the quiet of his room. He didn’t really have returning clients, for which he was grateful because it would mean for them yet another story. But he often got news from them, and sadly, from time to time, a new client came in after a recommendation from an existing one.

Alec was working on a project when Isabelle entered his room.

“Alec, you busy?”  
“Why?”  
“There’s someone here that you might want to see. Clary sent him.”  
“Clary as in talking-non-stop Clary?”  
“Do you know any other Clary?”  
“No. But I just wanted to make sure. Does he seem to talk as much?”  
“Not really. He has a very specific idea of what he wants, and neither Jace nor I would be a good fit. I feel like you could be it. Would you mind talking with him and see?”  
“Iz.”  
“Don’t whine. I wouldn’t have come if I wasn’t almost positive. Please?”  
“Fine. But you owe me coffee for the remaining of the week.”  
“Fine.”

Alec watched his sister leave and waited for the client to arrive. A few moments later, Isabelle was back.

“oy, Alec. Here’s Magnus, Clary’s friend. He has a project I think you’d like. Please be nice”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus talk some more. We move forward in time until we reach Christmas and we meet with the Lightwood family again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> For those celebrating, I hope you had a wonderful Christmas. And for all of you, I hope you had a nice week. Mine has been hectic but I wanted to update at least this one today, since it's already written and everything.
> 
> This chapter marks the beginning of healing and fluff. 
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> And again, thanks to everyone who leaves kudos or comments, it is super interesting to see what you think!

“And that’s when I met you.”

Alec looked at Magnus who had tears in his eyes. Instead of the pity or disgust he had expected, he was met with actual concern yet again.

“I am so sorry Alexander.”

“Nothing you can do about it Magnus. But I needed you to know. Because you are the first person I’ve met since Will with whom I’d like to know where it could go. And I’m terrified. I’m terrified of being hurt again. I’m terrified of hurting you.”

“I understand the fear Darling. The pain you feel when you find yourself on your own is so hard. And being ripped away from a beautiful situation must have been terrible. Thank you for telling me. I’m sorry for pushing the other day, I had no idea.”

“You couldn’t have known. And it seems only fair that you would expect your boyfriend to share his past with you. So here’s mine.”

“You remained in touch with Logan anyway?”

“I did, but everything is different. I still feel so responsible for what happened to him. I hurt each time I see him.”

“But it wasn’t your fault Darling. I’m sure he doesn’t blame you.”

“You’re right, he doesn’t. But I can’t help myself. I was the one who organized everything and I’m the one who got lucky.”

“Do you really? Consider yourself lucky?”

“I am alive and walking. I’d say I’m the luckiest.”

“I agree, you are the luckiest. But from what you’re telling me I don’t think you believe you’re lucky.”

“I guess, it makes sense.”

“Is it ok if I hug you?”

“Please.”

Magnus stood and went to Alec’s chair. Alec turned around and just let his forehead rest on Magnus’ abdomen. He felt fingers thread through his hair and despite swearing to himself that he wouldn’t cry, he let the tears fall.

“You are brave Alexander. So brave. Turning your life upside down. Asking for help. Those steps must have been difficult to take and yet here you are. I am truly thankful that you trusted me with your story. I am sorry that so many bad things happened to you. I am sorry for your loss. I think you’d be more comfortable on the couch Darling, can you move?”

Alec nodded and got up. He felt Magnus link his fingers with his and apply a little pressure to help him move. They went to the couch and sat face to face. Alec knew he must look miserable, but at the same time, he felt better.

“Thank you for listening. Thank you for not running away. I’d understand if it were too much for you and you’d prefer to call it quits now. It’s also the other reason why I believed it was important to talk to you now. I don’t want us to start a relationship if you don’t know everything. Because it also means that there are some things I’m not comfortable with.”

“There are some things I am not comfortable with, and I don’t have your past. It’s ok to have insecurities Alexander. I would be worried if you didn’t have any that early in a relationship.”

“That’s also another point I want to be very clear on too. My dating experience is just Will. Of course I’ve had nights here and there, even after Will. But I haven’t called someone my boyfriend in many years. I haven’t wanted to call someone my boyfriend in many years.”

“I am honored that you let me be the one you call your boyfriend. There’s something else I’d like to add. I don’t care how many relationships you’ve been in. It doesn’t matter. What matters is whether you want this one to be one or not. Will we make mistakes? Yes, of course we will. And not because we don’t have experience or because we’re bad people. We’ll make mistakes because that’s human nature for you.”

“You’re right. We’ll walk together and see where this takes us.”

“Exactly. I am not void of any flaw myself. I have very deep abandonment issues. I am scared of not being enough and people just leaving me on the side.”

“Then we will have to make sure we’re always talking, and always reassuring the other. But mostly communicate, to avoid any misunderstandings.”

“I think that’s a very good answer Darling.”

They stayed on the couch a bit longer and then, Magnus just went and grabbed their food from the kitchen.

“You know, I might get used to you cooking for me…”

“Good thing I like doing it then.”

“Even when you’ve been working like crazy the week before?”

“Of course. Running a restaurant is always pressure, but it’s more because of everything around it than the food itself. Cooking relaxes me. Handling people is another story.”

“I get that. I knew when I came back that I couldn’t handle a job with a lot of contact.”

“Shame, you’re good at it.”

“Ha, I might have been biased with you.”

“Maybe, but you were nice even before we went for lunch.”

“I guess.”

“You want to know what I think?”

“Please, enlighten me.”

“I’m sure that behind all this gruff exterior, you’re actually a sweet soft man. You don’t show it to people you don’t know, but it’s obvious when you are with people you care for. Like when we had dinner with your family The way you talk to your sister, even Jace, shows the real you. And he seems extremely kind.”

“My siblings have always been my everything. It’s even truer nowadays.”

They finished their lunch and when Magnus got up to clean the table, Alec turned to him.

“Hey, do you want to stay?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, would you like to stay the afternoon and have dinner with me?”

“Are you sure? You don’t have anything planned?”

“Well, I hoped I’d do something with my boyfriend, if he’s not busy that is.”

“He’s not busy, and he’d love to.”

“I was wondering if…” Alec took a deep breath and looked Magnus square in the eyes “I found some old photographs I took when I was traveling, and I was wondering if you’d like to take a look at them?”

“I’d love that. You must have seen some fabulous places.”

“I have. Gimme a minute to pick the albums and I’ll show you.”

Alec got up and went to pick his binders. He hadn’t shown the last year worth of pictures to anyone. He had wanted to keep it special and make a book out of it. But things had happened and those pictures had remained hidden. Truthfully, Alec was extremely proud of those last shots, but at the time, it had felt like an end to something. Today, it felt like a new beginning.

Magnus didn’t know this side of Alec, and it was a perfect way of showing him this other side of Alec’s persona. His pictures usually were a reflection of his feelings and a reflection of his view on a specific place or era. They held a special place in his heart and Alec felt like they revealed way more of himself than words ever would. It also kind of was a test, to see how much Magnus was receptive to arts.

Alec entered the living room again with his arms full.

“Wow, that’s a lot.”

“That’s approximately a year worth of pictures. I used to travel with so many memory cards because I didn’t want to have to erase anything. Sometimes, pictures look awful when you look at them on camera, but when you put them on a bigger screen you can see the potential, if not to be printed, at least to be drawn.”

“Did you draw a lot of them?”

“Not as many as I would have liked. I mostly worked in photography and I didn’t exactly have a lot of time to draw. Most of my drawings are actually moments I never captured on camera.”

“Some moments are worth savoring. I really get the difference between the two. It’s exactly the same as when you’re cooking because you have to eat and cooking because you want to have something special.”

“Exactly. Funny how our passions are so different and yet so similar.”

Magnus was still on the couch so Alec just went and sit at the foot of it, next to Magnus. He grabbed the first album and opened it. It was his trip in Italy. Those pictures were some of Alec’s favorites, because they were a mix between sceneries and food.

“I am so jealous you got to taste Italian food straight from Italian hands.”

“It was an experience. No matter where I was, I would always try to find very small places, that looked more authentic than the usual tourists traps. That’s where you get the best food. I can say I was pretty lucky to taste so many different cultures.”

“I’m sure. One day, I’d like to go to Italy.”

“Who knows, we might end up going together? I could show you around.”

“I like the idea.”

They moved through the pages, Alec commenting here and there. They had been watching pictures for almost an hour when Alec’s breath hitched at a picture. He grabbed it and held it closer.

“Is that Will?”

“Yes.”

The picture had been taken a morning when they had left early to go visit a winery. They needed to reach the vineyard at the crack of dawn if they wanted to avoid the crowd and the heat. The sun was barely rising behind the vines and Will wasn’t looking at the camera. He was looking at the sun, in the middle of the field. The picture was gorgeous. And it was extremely rare for Will to be on pictures, Alec even had forgotten about this one.

“You should keep this one out Alexander. Maybe have it framed? It’s a beautiful picture.”

“It is. He never wanted me to take his picture. Sorry, I’m sure talking about your ex isn’t really good dating etiquette.”

“First rule of dating is we do what we feel comfortable doing. Will was an important part of your life. If I had been married and lost my partner, would you want me to never mention them?”

“No, of course not, they’re a part of who you are.”

Alec saw Magnus’ smile and realized what the other man had just done.

“Fair enough.”

“I’m not saying it should be on your bedside table. It could if you wanted it to. But it’s an aesthetic picture, it makes sense that you would expose it.”

“Thank you Magnus. I have never shown those pictures to anyone. This is the last batch I took before we head home and before the accident. Afterwards, I couldn’t bear looking at the memories. Thank you for giving me new ones to go with it.”

They spent hours just shuffling through the pictures, Alec taking the time to give Magnus insight on what was happening and why it had been a good shot. Of course, there also were some useless ones, and a few of Alec. Those were probably the hardest to look at, because they were so different from the man he was now. First, he had just one small tattoo on his stomach, the same one as Isabelle and Jace, but nothing more. He was in a better shape then, and didn’t mind wearing shorts.

“You look so young on those.”

“Well, I was.”

“Carefree looks good on you. Just saying, for future reference.”

“Thanks, it felt great too.”

“I should probably head out. It’s late.”

“Oh, ok.I mean, I’m not doing anything, you’re more than welcome to stay if you don’t have anything planned.”

“I don’t.”

“Would you like to stay? We could order in and watch tv. Maybe get prepared better than last time? Maybe we could agree ahead of time on you spending the night here?”

“I like your plan. Are you sure about the night though? I can definitely catch a cab when we’re done with TV.”

“I want you to stay.”

“Ok. Maybe we could rush over to my place and grab a bag?”

“We can. Though I can lend you some clothes for the night, I have a spare toothbrush and toiletries. I get it if you prefer your own, don’t worry.”

“No no I don’t mind. Can I be brutally honest?”

“Sure.”

“The idea of wearing your clothes… hot.”

“I’m with you on that.”

The ordered pizza and watched tv until Alec yawned in front of the tv.

“Do you want to go to bed Darling? You look exhausted.”

“I haven’t slept well those last nights, guess I had something on my mind. You ready to head to bed too? You could stay up if you prefer, I don’t mind.”

“Nah, I’m coming with you. I have a tiring day tomorrow anyway, I need the sleep.”

Alec lead Magnus to his bedroom and his ensuite bathroom. He grabbed pajama bottoms and a tshirt and put them on his bed for Magnus.

“I don’t know what you usually sleep in, if you need anything else, feel free to browse in my drawers.”

“I usually sleep in just my boxers Darling.”

“Oh. Well, if you want… I huh…”

“What about you?”

“I wear pants, always.”

“Even when you’re alone.”

“I don’t like seeing them. Despite the tattoos, it still is too much of a reminder. You don’t have to though, I’m fine with you sleeping only in your boxers if you are.”

“I’ll definitely be more comfortable.”

They got ready for bed, and soon, they were hidden by the covers, each on a side of the bed. Alec turned on his side to look at Magnus, who did the same.

“You’re beautiful Magnus.”

“You’re not so bad yourself Alexander.”

“I’d like to hold you, is it alright?”

“I’d like that too.”

Alec shuffled closer to Magnus and let his hand slowly move up and down Magnus side, until it rested on his hip and brought him closer. Once there, Alec dropped his head and captured Magnus’ lips, drawing him out with a warm kiss. He felt Magnus’ hand reach up his leg, to his backside where it settled, drawing some circles with his thumb. Alec was feeling so comfortable in Magnus’ embrace. It was a lot, but it was so enjoyable.

“Thanks for coming today Magnus and thank you for listening. I’m glad you decided to stay tonight.”

“I’m glad you invited me and offered me some cuddles along.”

“I like cuddles. Don’t say it to anyone though, I have a reputation to uphold.”

“It’ll be out secret Darling.”

They slowly fell into a deep slumber. From that day forward, not a day would go by without either Alec or Magnus sending a text to the other, just checking in, or making plans for whenever they both were available.

Mid-December arrived and Alec had invited Magnus over with a specific idea in mind.

“So, I wanted to run something past you. Usually, I celebrate Christmas with my family. And I was wondering if you’d like to come celebrate with us? Unless you have something planned with your own family, I’d totally understand.”

“We don’t do Christmas at home. Too many religious disparities. We hold a Holiday Dinner first weekend after Christmas, where we just celebrate being happy together.”

“That’s a nice tradition, very inclusive.”

“Clary was always complaining that she couldn’t celebrate with Simon because he’s Jewish. And then I came in and we don’t really celebrate Christmas in Indonesia so it made sense to organize something different.”

“It does. Our dinner will look mild next to it. It’s just us, turkey, mashed potatoes and dessert. Alcohol. Funny stories.”

“Where are you having it?”

“My parents’ house.”

Alec, who had been facing the other way, turned around when he said this last sentence, to see Magnus’ eyes widen. He realized that despite it having bee obvious for him, he hadn’t specified that his parents would be there too, alongside with his siblings.

“I probably should have led with that, right? We’re celebrating Christmas all together: Isabelle, Jace, my parents and Max, my younger brother. My parents would love to meet you.”

“I’d love that too. But you know it means that I’m going to have to go shopping… and you have to come with me because I have no idea what to get to anyone. I would probably find ideas for Isabelle but I would be at loss for people I have never met.”

“Don’t worry Magnus, they don’t need anything.”

“It’s not a question of need Alexander. I’m going to meet my boyfriend’s parents for the first time, they’re inviting me into their home, the least I can do is bring them something.”

“I don’t want to worry though, they already like you, a lot. How could they not when I do too?”

“I like you a lot too Alexander.”

They grinned at each other and Alec called his mom to let her know that Magnus would join them for dinner.

As promised, Magnus took Alec shopping for everyone. Alec had never been a fan of shopping but he had to admit that seeing his boyfriend getting over excited was cute. This was a side of Magnus that he didn’t know yet. Of course the man seemed to be on spot with fashion but it didn’t have to mean that he enjoyed shopping for everything. And literally everything. It took them a whole day to cover everyone and Alec felt like they had done a good job. He had already had his own list ready so this had been easy. But Magnus was more picky than him when it came to gift giving. Alec had to really rack his brain for specific ideas.

Alec had told Magnus to come to his place on Christmas Eve morning, so that they could go together to his parents’ house. Not that he didn’t trust his parents. His siblings were another story. He had also told Magnus to bring an overnight bag because they might end up staying the night. Alec never was comfortable taking the car at night, especially after a celebration where alcohol would be present.

“Morning Darling.”

“Morning Magnus. You look beautiful”

“Thank you. You look beautiful too.”

“Magnus I am not even ready yet.”

“So? Doesn’t make you less beautiful…”

“Charmer.”

“Always. So I’ve got everything ready. When are we supposed to arrive there?”

“We can go whenever. My parents are at home, so is Max. Isabelle and Jace will probably arrive around 5:00.”

“What time do you usually go?”

“Usually? I’m already there.”

“You should have told me Alexander. I could have come earlier.”

“No, it’s perfect that way. I usually go before because I didn’t like being on my own on this day. I’ve always loved Christmas. But I’m not on my own anymore.”

Alec saw the moment his words registered in Magnus’ brain, and the smile that came onto his face showed him how happy he had made him. They had been seeing each other for a few months now and Alec felt really comfortable with Magnus. They would see each other when both their schedules were clear and often end up stay the night at the place they were. They had had a lengthy discussion a few weeks before, after Alec had revealed his story, on how Alec wasn’t ready for more yet.

_“You know that we can do whatever you like Alexander. I will never pressure you to do anything.”_

_“I appreciate that Magnus. I want to be ready for more.”_

_“But you’re not yet, and it’s fine.”_

_“You have no idea how much I want to be ready.”_

_“Then it’ll come in its time Darling. Don’t pressure yourself. I’m perfectly happy as we are.”_

_“I’m happy too. I just can’t wait for the day we get to share this too.”_

_“I’ll be there whenever Darling. And we’ll share whatever you’re ready for.”_

This had been the first time Alec had questioned his feelings for Magnus. Not in a bad way. The opposite actually. It wasn’t love yet, but Alec could feel himself getting there. Magnus helped him feel more comfortable in his own skin. When he was with Magnus, Alec didn’t mind being himself, even if it meant being dark from time to time. And as days went by, Alec was becoming more certain of one thing: soon. Soon, it would be more.

“When are your parents expecting us?”

“I didn’t give them a specific time. I wanted to run things by you first. We have two options: either arrive before Iz and Jace, or arrive after. If we arrive after, you’ll have familiar faces in the room. But if we arrive before, it’ll give you more time to get acquainted with my parents and Max.”

“Which one do you prefer?”

“I don’t mind either, but they’re my family so it’s easy for me.”

“I think I’d rather meet your parents first, without Jace and Isabelle. It will be easy to talk with your siblings so I feel like if I want to get to know your parents too, it’s better if it’s just us.”

“Ok, we can arrive around 4pm then. Leaves enough time for us to talk before the savages arrive.”

“Savages?”

“Oh you haven’t seen anything Magnus. They are savages. But don’t worry, I’ll protect you.”

As if to prove his point, Alec went to Magnus and engulfed him in a hug. They rocked together, just holding each other and enjoying the calm and warm feelings that were going through them.

Alec got his things ready and when everything was prepared, they took a cab to the Lightwoods. Alec was fidgeting during the cab ride, something he hadn’t realized until he felt Magnus’ hand on his leg.

“Are you alright Darling?”

“I’m fine Magnus. Just… I hope they like you as much as I do.”

“I am charming, so don’t worry. More seriously though, do you think they might have a reason not to?”

“No, I can’t think of any.”

“See. Try to think rationally when you get worried, I know it helps me. I know emotions tend to get the best out of us, but trying to look at it from an outsider point of view usually helps.”

They arrived an hour later and Alec was still feeling a little anxious. He hadn’t introduced anyone to his parents since Will. And Magnus was nothing like Will. And his parents had loved Will. Trying Magnus’ way, he focused his brain on the fact that he and his siblings were drastically different people and that it didn’t prevent his parents from loving all of them.

They climbed the stairs to the door and after knocking, Alec just let them in.

“Hello, anyone home?”

“Alec?”

“Hey Mom. In the kitchen?”

“Yes! Just drop your thing in the hallway, we’ll have time to put everything in your room afterwards.”

Alec did as he had been instructed, took Magnus’ hand in his and went for the kitchen. It smelled heavenly and Alec suddenly felt happier than he had in a long time. They reached the kitchen to find Maryse preparing a sauce while everything else was cooking.

“Hi Alec. And you must be Magnus. Sorry not to shake your hands but mine are a bit busy right now.”

“Hi Mrs Lightwood. No worries, I know all about being busy in the kitchen. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Oh right, you’re a chef.”

“I am.”

“I might end up asking for help then.”

“I’d be happy to.”

“How are you Alec?”

“I’m fine Mom. Where are dad and Max?”

“They went to get dessert. They should be back soon.”

“How can I help in the meantime?”

“Not sure I want your help sweetheart.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing. Just that my cooking skills didn’t descend to any of you Lightwood children. Tell you what: why don’t you grab us three a glass of wine in the cellar? We’ll start celebrating together.”

Alec left for the cellar after sending a smile Magnus’ way. He knew it was his mother’s way of sending him out of the kitchen. He had no doubt that despite all her smiles and nice manners, she wanted to get her moment with Magnus to try and know him better, without Alec in the room.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen.

“So Magnus, Alec told me you met when you got tattooed right?”

“We did. I met Isabelle first, but it turned out that I wanted something more along Alec’s capacities. It does look a lot like of his, even though it’s a different flower.”

“You’ve seen his tattoos?”

“The ones on his torso yes. He was shirtless when I entered his room at the shop.”

“Forgive me Magnus, I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just really surprised. Alec doesn’t really like to show his body since…”

“Since Will?”

“He told you about Will?”

“He did. Not so long ago. He knows my story too. I wanted to thank you for encouraging him to tell me. Not that he had to or anything, but I think it will help me understand him better. And I will do my best to try not to trigger anything now that I know more.”

“I believe he did the right thing telling you. It was a bit of test if I’m being honest. He hadn’t told that story to anyone since it happened. I know he didn’t have relationships before you because we talk. I also know you took him by surprise. I wanted him to tell you because it’s a huge part of who he is. And I truly believe that he cannot move forward if he keeps stuck in the past. He has to let go. And it’s not an easy thing.”

“I agree, it’s actually the meaning of the tattoo he did on me. I wanted something to remember my past but to make room for a new start. And even if our pasts are different, I understand loss. I know we’re just starting our relationship, but I deeply care for your son.”

“I can’t speak for him, but the simple fact that he wanted you here on Christmas means he must care for you too. Be it as it may, and I’m sure you’ll get that exact same sentence from his siblings, Alec is my priority. I will protect him with all I am. So…”

“If I hurt him, I’ll be seeing you? Don’t worry, I don’t plan on hurting him.”

“Sometimes, things happen anyway.”

“I’ll do my best to make sure it doesn’t but yes, I can’t promise I’ll never hurt him. I can promise you though that I will not do it on purpose if it were to happen.”

“That’s all I can ask for. He’s already been hurt way too much for his age.”

“I agree Mrs Lightwood.”

“Call me Maryse, Magnus. Mrs Lightwood makes me sound way too old.”

Alec came back to see his mother and his boyfriend laughing. The sight felt good and he hoped that his whole family would welcome Magnus too.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas time with the family(ies?). Alec and Magnus discover each other some more and share their first Christmas together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> This chapter still deals with some heavy things, but no angst I promise. It's one of my favorite chapters so far, because you discover a lot in it and it feels warm and comfortable.
> 
> Now that I'm done with the Christmas countdown, I'm going to get back to writing this baby. It's good to finally be back with them, I missed them and I want the fluff to happen...
> 
> A huge thanks to all the kudos and comments, I love hearing what you have to say!
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here on twitter @caronahya
> 
> Enjoy!

“So, that Christmas dinner was pretty nice.”  
“Really? I know they can be a lot Magnus, you don’t have to sugarcoat it for me.”  
“I’m not. You have a lovely family.”  
“They are pretty great. We are all close and it helps a lot.”  
“I’m sure it does. Your parents share a beautiful love. And they’ve transmitted it to their children, it’s beautiful to see.”  
“Thank you. I’ll consider myself lucky if I’m at least half as happy as they are. I was glad you were here with me tonight. Did you spend a nice evening?”  
“I did Alexander. Thank you for inviting me.”

Alec bent down to capture Magnus’ lips with his. He brought him closer by pulling on his waist, until they were touching the bed. Alec slowly made them fall on it and scoot backwards. He let his hands roam freely on Magnus’ body and was rewarder with a moaning sound that empowered him even more.

“Darling, I think we need to stop. I don’t want our first time to happen at your parents’ house.”  
“You’re right, you’re right. Sorry, I got carried away.”  
“No need to apologize. I love it when you get carried away. Should we get ready for bed then? We can cuddle and kiss some more afterwards?”  
“Sure. You can have the bathroom first, I need to go tell my sister something.”  
“Perfect.”

Alec left Magnus in his bedroom and went to Isabelle’s. After a quick knock on her door, he waited for her “yes?” and entered.

“Everything ok Alec?”  
“Yes, yes. Magnus is in the bathroom and I want to come see you.”  
“What’s wrong?”  
“First, don’t barge in my bedroom tomorrow morning, ok? I know you’ll want to do it because it’s tradition but I don’t want Magnus to feel bad or anything.”  
“Does this mean you guys…”  
“No. And that’s another reason why I came to you.”  
“Ok? Do you need anything? I have condoms, lube…”  
“No, no, Iz please. We really haven’t gone that far. Not even close to getting that far. I’m still…”  
“Oh Alec. You have nothing to be ashamed of.”  
“It’s not pretty Iz.”  
“So? The rest of you is handsome enough brother. Has Magnus seen the scars?”  
“No, he hasn’t. I’m scared Iz.”  
“Listen Alec, I know them, like the back of my hand. I’ve tattooed one remember?”  
“Of course I do.”  
“So let me tell you this: even before the tattoo, your leg was nothing to be ashamed of. You are more than the physical aspects of your body. You are more than your scars. What do you think you’d be more comfortable with: him seeing them or him touching them in the dark?”  
“I will be uncomfortable both ways Iz. But I think… at least with the light on, the tattoos are visible, and they make it less painful. He won’t have to feel the way the skin stretches.”  
“So ask yourself this: if the situation was the other way around, what would you prefer?”  
“I guess I’d prefer seeing them. Or more precisely, I’d prefer seeing how the person in front of me would react. It could guide me on how to proceed or not.”  
“Exactly. My advice big brother: don’t make a big deal out of it. I know it is. I know how important this step is for you. But the more pressure you’ll put on it, the highest chance you take of being disappointed. Do what feels natural.”  
“Thanks Iz.”  
“Anytime. Now go back to your man before he sneaks out for some more cookies.”

Alec left his sister’s room and when he entered his bedroom, Magnus was already on his bed.

“All good?”  
“Yes. Isabelle has this nasty habit of barging in here on Christmas morning, I just wanted to avoid you that. I’m gonna go get ready.”  
“Perfect.”

Alec went to the bathroom and washed up. He brushed his teeth and went back to his bedroom, still dressed. He arrived near the bed and before he could plop down on it, he cleared his throat.

“Anything wrong Darling?”  
“No. I just wanted to ask you. Do you mind if I sleep in my boxers tonight?”

Alec saw the moment Magnus fully understood what he was saying. He was trying his best not to show how nervous he was, but Magnus was taking so long that he was on the verge of changing his mind.

“I don’t mind Darling. Do you want me to turn over when you get in bed?”  
“That would kind of defeat the point Magnus.”  
“I didn’t want to assume Alexander. I have no problem with you sleeping only in your underwear.”

Alec nodded and went to grab his t-shirt. This was easy. This they had already done. But when his hands reached his pants, they were shaking. He had his eyes focused on his task, when he saw hands reach out to his.

“You know you don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable doing Darling?”  
“I know Magnus. But I’m ready. I want to be myself. And, as sad as it is, this is who I am.”  
“Let me help you?”

Alec was looking at Magnus an intense gaze in his eyes, until he slowly nodded his head and removed his own hands. He felt Magnus grab the button and then zipper of his jeans and open them. He then stood up and went behind Alec. He finished opening his pants and slowly slid them down his legs. Alec knew he was shaking, but he gave Magnus some time. His thighs were tattooed on the back too and he knew the other man was just looking at those designs.

“Your tattoos are beautiful Darling. They weren’t done by the same artist, were they?”  
“Iz did the right, Jace the left. How did you know?”  
“The patterns are different. They don’t tell the same story. From what I see, Isabelle’s focused on healing and feeling better, while Jace’s is all about fighting and surviving.”  
“Exactly. I knew I wanted them to tattoo me. I let them decide what they wanted to do. After all, they couldn’t really ruin my legs more than they were. The designs are so… them… that I never regretted my choice.”  
“They are truly amazing Alexander.”

Alec felt Magnus’ hand on his lower back and then the other one on his side, making him turn over. When he did, Magnus was at the same height as he was, looking in his eyes and nowhere else.

“You can look Magnus, it’s fine. It’s just not pretty.”  
“It doesn’t need to be pretty to be perfect Darling.”

Alec felt Magnus leave his personal space and watched his head look down. When Magnus’s face showed no emotion, Alec wondered whether this was because Magnus didn’t want to hurt his feelings but as he waited, he realized that Magnus was trying to keep his tears at bay.

“If they upset you too much, I can put on some pants Magnus. I won’t be offended.”  
“Please don’t. Your siblings drawings are just perfect, they represent who you are, so much. You are breathtaking Darling. Absolutely stunning.”

Alec didn’t know how to answer. Instead of the disgust and shame he had expected, his boyfriend made him feel safe and completely at ease with who he was. He grabbed Magnus by the waist and brought him closer. He hid his face in Magnus’ neck and breathed him in deeply.

“We should turn it, we have a habit of waking up early on Christmas morning for presents.”  
“I love presents! To bed then!”

They got under the covers and Alec remained on his side. He didn’t know if Magnus would be ok with hugging him with his scars on display. The feel of scar tissue was drastically different to what skin felt like and it could take a while to get accustomed to. They were both on their back, breathing slowly, when Alec heard Magnus quietly ask.

“Would it be ok to cuddle Darling? We don’t have to, but I would love to be in your arms right now.”  
“Sure.”

Alec turned to be on his side and Magnus did the same. Once they were face to face, Alec could see Magnus’ eyes and the pride he had in them. He got closer, until they were almost touching and waited. He wanted Magnus to be the one to take that last step. He wasn’t disappointed when his boyfriend turned over and snuggled his back to Alec’s front.

“Tell me if you’re not comfortable Darling.”  
“I am Magnus. Good night.”  
“Good night Darling.”

Alec fell asleep a few moments after Magnus. He was having a hard time believing things had been that easy. Well, easy probably isn’t the best word to describe it. But Alec had expecting questions, long stares and maybe even touches. But Magnus had just looked at him and accepted. He had even appreciated his tattoos and noticed the difference between them. He realized in that instant that he had made the right choice waiting. 

Alec woke up a bit disoriented. He could smell coffee and cookies. And he felt warm, so warm. He slowly opened his eyes, to find Magnus already awake and looking at him a fond smile on his face.

“Morning.”  
“Morning Darling. How did you sleep?”  
“Like a baby. You?”  
“Same. You are a nice warm comforter Alexander.”  
“Glad to be of service.”  
“Can I ask you something super personal that you can totally refuse to answer?”  
“Sure. You can ask me anything Magnus.”  
“Do you still have feelings on your thighs?”  
“I do. Less than before and the skin is damaged. I need to hydrate it way more than any other patch of skin. And it feels weird to the touch I guess. Bumpier and yet softer in a way? It’s hard to explain. You could… I mean, I wouldn’t mind if you want to feel it on your own?”  
“I don’t have to Alexander, I was mostly curious.”  
“Ok. But you definitely can if you want. When we move forward, you’ll be in contact with it anyway.”  
“Move forward you say?”  
“Hm mm. But not in my parents’ house Magnus. Stop pouting, you were the one to say it last night.”  
“I know, I know. But I’m extra horny in the morning, that’s it.”  
“I’ll keep that in mind for future reference.”

They smiled goofily at each other and then heard a soft knock on the door.

“Alec? Magnus? You’re awake?”  
“We are Max. What is it?”  
“We’re just waiting for you guys to open the presents, so I just wanted to check if you were awake.”  
“Give us 10 minutes and we’ll be downstairs.”  
“Ok!”

They heard Max leave and Alec felt Magnus chuckle against him.

“Do you think Isabelle sent Max so you wouldn’t get mad.”  
“I don’t think Magnus, I’m sure of it. Come on, we don’t want to make them wait. I’m sure Iz wouldn’t mind barging in here.”

They got ready and went downstairs, to find the whole Lightwood family already in the living room, coffee mugs scattered all around the place.

“Morning everyone.”  
“Good morning Dear, Magnus. Did you sleep well?”  
“We did, thanks.”  
“We waited for you to open the presents.”  
“And you took your damn time.”  
“Isabelle!”  
“What Mom? It’s true. It’s almost 10:00am, we usually do presents around 8:30!”  
“Remind me again, Iz, how old you are?”  
“It’s not because you’re already a grandpa in your head that we all are, Alec. I love presents.”

Alec stuck his tongue out at his sister and felt Magnus giggle next to him.

“I apologize on behalf of my children Magnus. I swear they’re usually more well-behaved than this.”  
“No we’re not. You just want to make a good impression.”  
“You too, Jace?”  
“What? I’m just saying the truth. Now, can we open presents?”

Max was up in a second and went to the Christmas tree to grab the presents. He started giving them around. First to his parents, then Isabelle. As the bags and boxes were given around, Alec felt Magnus come into his side. He lifted his arm and dropped it back behind Magnus, securing him.

Max took a box to Jace, and finally one to Alec. Alec felt Magnus freeze when one was dropped on his legs too. Magnus tilted his head and looked at Alec, who just smiled at him.

“Don’t look so surprised Magnus. You brought them gifts too.”  
“Yes, but I didn’t expect to have some.”  
“Enjoy then.”

Once everyone had their gift, they proceeded to open them and the room was filled with laughter and joy. Alec looked around him and a sense of calm overwhelmed him, to the point of tears. His felt his mother’s gaze on him and saw her smile at him.

“Alec sweetheart, I need help in the kitchen to refill everyone. Would you mind giving me a hand?”  
“Sure Mom.”

He got up, kissed Magnus’ head and followed his Mom to the kitchen.

“You looked like you needed a break in there. Are you alright?”  
“I am. It’s been an overwhelming Christmas.”  
“Your father and I are extremely proud of you Alec, for trying again. Magnus seems like a genuinely nice person.”  
“I hope he is. He saw my scars yesterday.”  
“He did?! How did he react?”  
“He realized the tattoos hadn’t been done by the same artist.”  
“And how did YOU feel?”  
“Anxious, worried, terrified. You name it. But afterwards, I felt so relieved. Like I could finally move on.”  
“I’m glad Alec. Glad that you’re finally realizing that moving on doesn’t mean forgetting.”  
“Magnus said something similar the other day. I was showing him the last batch of pictures I took with Will, and there was one of Will, he looked so happy and calm on it. Magnus told me it would be fine to have it in the apartment. Because it’s a gorgeous picture.”  
“I agree. Will was an important part of your life. I wouldn’t say put it in your bedroom or in the center of your living room. But in the hallway? Why not? It’s a piece of art, and if it were anyone else on the picture you wouldn’t even give it a second thought.”  
“I might. I don’t know if I’m ready. Seeing him everyday? Too much of a reminder.”  
“I love you Alec.”  
“Love you too Mom.”

Alec went back next to Magnus, and hugged him to his side again.

“Everything ok Darling?”  
“More than Magnus.”

They finished their morning in the Lightwood household and then both left to go their own ways. Magnus had plans with his foster parents for lunch.

“Can I run something by you? I was on the phone last night with Jocelyn and she scolded me for not inviting you to come to our Christmas lunch.”  
“It’s fine Magnus.”  
“But I want to. I want you to come.”  
“Are you sure? You don’t have to do it just because you came to my parents’ house. You told me you didn’t really celebrate anyway.”  
“True, but it’s nice to get the whole family together. If you don’t want to come, that’s perfectly fine. But I’d like it if you did.”  
“If you’re sure, I’d love to meet your family.”

Magnus smiled at him, grabbed his hand and hailed a cab. On the way there, Alec questioned him on whether he should call Jocelyn to let her know he was bringing someone. Magnus just laughed and told Alec that she probably was already expecting him and that she always cooked too much anyway.

They arrived in front of building and Alec followed Magnus to the door. When it opened, Alec almost laughed at the shocked look on Clary’s face.

“Alec hi! Magnus, you didn’t tell me you were bringing Alec.”  
“Now Clarissa don’t be a child. You know Alec. Mom told me I could so he’s there. Don’t be jealous because you don’t get your own Lightwood at the table.”

Both Alec and Clary spoke at the same time.  
“His name is not Lightwood.”  
“His last name is Wayland.”

Alec smiled at Clary and despite all his apprehensions from his first meetings with her, Clary looked like the kind of person he’d be comfortable with.

“You two are not allowed to get along to the point of ganging up on me.”  
“Maybe you should have thought of that before then brother?”

They entered the apartment and Magnus grabbed Alec’s hand again. He led him to the living room, where his parents were already seated and having a glass of wine.

“Magnus hi, you made it. Oh, and you must be Alec, nice to meet you.”  
“Nice to meet you too, Mrs Garroway.”  
“Oh no, this won’t do. Jocelyn is perfectly fine. This is my husband Luke, and you already know Clary.”  
“Hi Luke. And yes, Clary has been a huge help to my brother, he’s gotten way better at designing now that he’s working with Clary.”

Alec couldn’t help the smirk that came on his face at the thought. 

They spent their day with Magnus’ family and when the day came to an end, Alec left the Garroway household feeling more content than he had in a while.

Once back in his apartment, Alec took some time to organize the place some more. He looked at the picture Magnus and him had discussed and decided it was worth being displayed. He went to grab everything and put it in his hallway, along with other pictures that were already there, memories of his past travels.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Year happens, shared with friends and family. But New Year always brings drama along, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> Thanks to all of you who are still with me on this one. I don't think I will be able to update every week, since I've reached my last fully written chapter. Everything else is just notes for now. But real life has taken an unanticipated turn and we're dealing with that so I have less time to write. I will finish, I will just go slower.
> 
> Aside from a few bumps in the road, you can now expect a nice cruising experience ;)
> 
> Thanks for the comments and kudos, I'll get to answering those later tonight!

With Christmas behind them, now came the time of New Year. Alec hadn’t celebrated it in a while. He would usually help his siblings get ready for their outings, while he stay put at home. This year though, he thought it would be nice to do something else for a change. He was in the shop with Isabelle when the idea came to mind.

“Hey Iz, what are your plans for New Year?”  
“I don’t have any yet. Why do you ask? Wanna tag along?”  
“Not really. I was more thinking of doing something at home? We could invite friends over and spend the evening together.”  
“I like the idea. Who did you have in mind?”  
“Us three obviously. Magnus, Clary and Simon, maybe also Magnus’ friends? Do you want me to extend the invitation to Meliorn?”  
“No, that won’t be necessary. I’m not really… I don’t know, let’s just say that the no strings attached from the beginning of our relationship is now becoming a bit too much. I don’t want to settle with Meliorn, but I don’t like the idea of sharing either. So I guess we’re calling it quits.”  
“I’m sorry Iz.”  
“Don’t be Alec. It was bound to happen at some point. But I like your idea. I’ll tell Jace later, but since you’ve said Clary, my guess is he’s gonna say yes.”

Alec smiled at his sister and grabbed his phone.

“Hey Magnus.”  
“Hi Darling.”  
“I was wondering, what are you doing for New Year?”  
“I don’t know yet, why?”  
“I wanted to do something small at home. Like you, my siblings, your sibling and her other half and maybe your friends if they’re available?”  
“That’s a great idea Alexander. Let me run it past them all and I’ll get back to you in the next days k?”  
“Perfect. Do you want to come tomorrow evening? We could have dinner and discuss everything?”  
“Can we make it the day after? I’m working tomorrow.”  
“Of course, see you then!”

The next two days just rushed by and Alec was exhausted when Magnus knocked on his door.

“Darling, you look like you need rest.”  
“Thanks Magnus.”  
“Oh you know I don’t mean anything by it. Just that you look tired. Do you want us to postpone?”  
“I would have called. I’m glad you’re here, despite being tired. End of the year is usually tricky with the shop, we need to make sure our numbers are done and that we’re ready to enter a new year.”  
“Tell me about it, I’ve been working on inventory the last few days.”  
“Really? In a restaurant?”  
“Well, we still have stuff that needs to be counted and yes, we make kind of a summary of the year, to anticipate the year to come.”  
“Makes sense. Do you mind if we order take out? I’ve been craving a pizza for days.”  
“Sure, you know I love pizza.”

They ordered food and then got settled on the couch.

“I saw you added a new picture in your hallway Darling.”  
“I did. You were right. I talked to my mom about it too and you both made valid points. It’s a beautiful picture, and a beautiful memory. Strangely enough, it’s also a good way of letting go of the past.”  
“It’s not that strange if you ask me. Will was a part of you that you kept hidden for so long, like you wanted to be the only one to remember him.”  
“Yes. How do you…”  
“My mom. I felt like if I could keep the memories to myself, it would make her be a part of my life anyway. But that’s not what happened. I had to let go. You helped me to let go.”  
“I love that I could help you Magnus, because you’re the one who helped me to let go too.”

They smiled at each other and Alec captured Magnus’ lips with his own, overwhelmed with affection. And if he were being completely honest, with lust too. The pizza delivery arrived and they ate with the tv on, chit chatting while watching, not really paying attention.

“Do you want to stay the night?”  
“I didn’t bring anything Darling.”  
“I could still lend you some clothes, and I kept your toiletries from last time. But it’s up to you.”  
“If you’re sure you don’t mind?”  
“I’m sure, absolutely.”

Alec saw Magnus smile and come closer until he kissed his cheek. The gesture was so intimate and caring that Alec didn’t really know how to respond. So he just exhaled, slowly and grabbed Magnus’ hand. He led him to his bedroom and started undressing him. After taking off his sweater and shirt, he did the same with his own clothing.

He moved closer to Magnus and grabbed his waist with both hands, pulling him flush against him and started peppering his neck with kisses. He distantly felt Magnus’ hands move on his back, until they rested on his neck. The kiss grew more urgent and sloppier, Alec letting his emotions take the lead. Until Magnus pushed him back gently.

“Darling, I think I know where this is going but I don’t want to assume.”  
“Where do you thing this is going?”

Alec had resumed his kisses on Magnus’ neck, more slowly.

“Alexander I’m serious. I have no problem with more but I just want to be sure where to stop. You are in charge Darling.”  
“Don’t stop then.”

Alec woke up with a smile on his face. Magnus was still snuggled against him, asleep. He moved a strand of hair out of his face and then felt his boyfriend stir and slowly open his eyes.

“Morning.”  
“Morning. Did you sleep well?”  
“I always do when I sleep next to you.”  
“Did you get tired after last night?”  
“Magnus!”  
“I’m kidding, I’m kidding. You blushing is something I will never get tired of. Especially after last night.”  
“It was a nice night, wasn’t it?”  
“It was.”  
“We have to get things ready, Iz and Jace will probably come around 4pm.”  
“Fine. What do we have to prepare?”  
“I was going to make my usual… frozen food on platters?”  
“Ugh no. We need to move then, we’re going grocery shopping.”  
“Magnus, you’re not cooking for 10 people.”  
“Please Darling, cooking for 10 people I could do in my sleep. I’ll make basic things, come on.”

The trip to the shops was fast and efficient. Magnus already had a clear idea of what he wanted to make. Alec just helped him by handing the ingredients and got bored, to the point where he tried to help and it resulted in a mistake so he went back to the counter and observed Magnus.

“You know, we’re being extremely domestic.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“Well, you’ve spent the night, we’re cooking together in the kitchen…”  
“Hm?”  
“Fine, you’re cooking in the kitchen and I’m watching but we’re doing it together…”  
“No that was last night Darling.”  
“Magnus! Will you let me finish?”  
“So, very domestic you were saying?”  
“Yes. It almost looks like you're living here.”

Alec saw Magnus stop cutting the cheese and put the knife on the side, hands shaking. He turned to look at Alec, an undecipherable look on his face.

“I didn’t mean anything else Magnus. Just that it looked domestic. Are you really that scared of moving in with me?”  
“Alexander, do you hear yourself?”  
“I do. I’m asking my boyfriend of a few months if moving in with me would be that horrible and the answer seems to be yes.”  
“I never said that Darling.”  
“You didn’t say the opposite either.”  
“Ok, you and I need to talk. Let me finish this and we’ll talk, I don’t want to have this conversation with you while I hold a knife.”  
“That’s reassuring…”

Alec went to the living room and waited for Magnus to join him. He wondered whether he had said too much. The thing was, he really hadn’t meant to freak Magnus out like this. There was nothing wrong with being domestic, the opposite actually. It meant that they were comfortable enough around one another. Maybe Magnus was right, maybe they needed to have a serious talk about where their relationship was going.

“I’m done. Alexander, stop looking like I kicked your puppy.”  
“Fine. So you wanted to talk?”  
“Yes. Darling there are still things you don’t know about me.”  
“Ok.”  
“And talking about being domestic and living together, I’m not… it’s difficult to explain.”  
“Is it because we had sex just yesterday?”  
“No. Darling no. Don’t go there. Last night was perfect. I am so thankful that you let me see you. I am so thankful that you shared this part of yourself with me.”  
“Is it because you need more time to see if we’re compatible?”  
“How are we going from “we look domestic” to “why are you not moving in with me”?”  
“Would it really be so bad? If I wanted you to move in with me?”  
“It wouldn’t be bad, at all. Are you sure you’re ready?”  
“I think I am.”  
“How do you know?”  
“I can’t be for sure. But that’s the point of trying. To see if we can. To see if we are happier together? How did you decide to move in with someone before?”  
“How did you?”  
“You know that story Magnus. And I asked you.”  
“I don’t know.”  
“What do you mean you don’t know?”  
“I’ve never lived with anyone Alexander.”

Alec’s heart broke at Magnus’ small voice. With all their talks about exes, they had never mentioned this specific point. 

“Hey Magnus, it’s ok. I’m sorry for pushing.”  
“Don’t apologize. It’s just insecurity I guess. I’ve never lived with anyone because I have never trusted any relationship to share my every day with them.”  
“That’s fine Magnus. It’s your decision and your feelings. I won’t bring it up again.”

Alec kissed Magnus’ temple and went back to the kitchen to prepare appetizers for the evening. He didn’t hear Magnus enter the room again but felt his hands on his stomach.

“I want to be ready Darling. I really want to. Please give me some time.”  
“Of course Magnus. I understand. I won’t bring it up but know this: I’m ready for more. And I’ll follow your lead this time around.”

Alec bent down to place a kiss on Magnus’ lips and went back to putting things on plate.

All their friends arrived later and the evening went by really fast. Soon it was already midnight. 

“Happy New Year Magnus.”  
“Happy New Year Darling.”  
“What are you hoping for for this new year?”  
“Happiness I guess. You?”  
“Same.”

Everybody left the apartment around 5am. Magnus was one of the last to go. Jace was still there when Alec closed the door.

“What happened Alec?”  
“What do you mean?”  
“You know what I mean… what’s with the sad face? And Magnus didn’t even spend the night.”  
“He’s working in a few hours and he has a lot of things to prepare.”  
“Alec. Talk to me.”  
“I might have freaked him out.”

Alec waited for Jace to say something but realized his brother was expectantly waiting for him to continue.

“He spent the night last night. And then in the morning we got up, went grocery shopping and he was in my kitchen looking all cozy and I might have told him it looked like he was living here with me.”  
“And you’re fine with that?”  
“With what? The fact that he’s comfortable enough in my house to feel like home? Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”  
“Alec, that’s huge. It’s a huge step. What did Magnus say?”  
“Basically that we needed to talk.”  
“Ouch.”  
“Yep. And then he went on explaining that he had never lived with anyone and that it was scary.”  
“I get that. I’m nowhere near close being ready to live with someone. Can I ask you something?”  
“Has it ever stopped you before when I said no?”  
“No. So I have two questions actually. Have you guys had sex yet?”  
“Where are you going with this?”  
“Answer me Alec.”  
“Fine. Yes we have. Once.”  
“Ok, second question: have you told him you love him?”  
“What?”  
“You heard me Alec. Have you told him?”  
“I… we…”  
“I’ll take that as a no. And it’s fine. You’re not sure yet. Now imagine how Magnus felt. He’s not sure yet either. I know that I’m not a romantic like you and that many subtleties escape me. But I know the fear of not being sure. And I know it’s definitely not a Lightwood thing but you’re gonna have to be patient.”  
“When did you become the wise one?”  
“I’ve always been, I’m just imparting my knowledge on you now. Seriously man, give him time. Don’t be afraid.”  
“I’ll try. Do you want to crash here?”  
“Nah, I’m gonna go, I have lunch with Clary today.”  
“You do?”  
“Yeah, we had decided that before you organized your last minute New Year’s bash.”  
“Have fun then.”  
“I will. Take care Alec, love you.”  
“Love you too Jace.”

Alec shut the door behind his brother and gathered the remaining elements of the party. It was already almost 7 in the morning, no use going to bed now. So Alec put on some sweat pants, sneakers and left for a run.

He took his time outside, enjoying the cold and sunny morning. The whole city was quiet and it felt so different to the usual hustle. After an hour, he went back home, showered and took his phone out. The shop was closed until January 4th so he wouldn’t be needed there. He had no plans for the day but usually, on January 1st, he would meet up with his siblings and go see their parents. So he sent a quick text to his mom. Not a minute later, his phone rang.

“Good morning Mom, happy new year.”  
“Happy new year Alec. How are you?”  
“Good. So, it’s ok if I come by later today?”  
“Are you doing anything now?”  
“Not really, why?”  
“We’re about to have lunch, do you want to join us? We could wait up a bit for you.”  
“Sure, I’d love that. I’m ready anyway, I’ll be there in 45 minutes.”

The ride to his parents made him fall asleep and he realized then that he was more tired than he thought. The run probably didn’t help. He arrived and entered the house.

“Mom? Dad?”  
“In the living room sweetheart.”  
“Hi Dad, happy new year.”  
“Happy new year son. Did you have fun last night?”  
“We did. It was nice to have everyone home you know? It we all got along well so there’s that.”  
“So who exactly did you have yesterday?”  
“Iz and Jace, obviously. Magnus and Clary. Simon, who’s Clary’s best friend, and Ragnor and Catarina, Magnus’ friends.”  
“Small gathering then?”  
“You know me, I’m not really a party over the roof kinda guy.”  
“That’s true. But it could have been yet another change that you’d make.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“You’ve been different lately. Happier maybe?”  
“Mom is better at fishing for information. But yes, I am. Happier I mean.”  
“The real question is are you happy?”  
“I am. I know you worry for me, that you’ve worried those last years, and I can’t thank you enough for always being there for me. But I think it’s time I tried to move on and have a life. I don’t think Will would have liked seeing me like this. I know I would have wanted him to have another chance at happiness.”  
“Will was an amazing person, I’m sure he wouldn’t want you to stay on your own forever. Anything I must know about Magnus?”  
“I might have scared him off a bit today. But I’ll work on that.”  
“What happened?”  
“I might have talked about moving in together, but just because a comment I made was taken out of context and it escalated, and I think it was too much. I’m going to give him a little time to process all this and then we’ll talk calmly about it.”  
“Alec that’s some heavy topic.”  
“I know. And again, it was taken out of context. Though I may have implied at some point that I wouldn’t mind him moving in with me.”  
“Wouldn’t you? Really?”  
“I think so yes. I try to think rationally. I like him, a lot. We have a good time together. Is it written anywhere that moving in together has to happen after a certain amount of time?”  
“Alec, of course not. But it is a very serious step. You never really had to go through it with Will, because you lived together before you got together. But this is different. Don’t rush things because you think this is what is expected of you.”  
“You’re right Dad. I never really had to experience the whole moving in together, and I didn’t really ask Magnus to move in with me. But he seemed so opposed to the whole thing, I don’t know. I get I was hurt more than anything.”  
“Maybe once you’ve thought about it some more, you can try and have a calmer discussion about it. Talk about your goals and how you’d like your relationship to grow.”  
“Thanks Dad.”  
“You’re welcome Alec. Maryse, sweetheart, you can come now, I know you’re waiting behind the door.”

Alec watched his mother enter the room, a frown on her face.

“I didn’t want to interrupt your talk. It sounded important.”  
“It was.”  
“Are you ok now?”  
“I am. I scared Magnus by kinda asking him to move in with me without really doing it and now things are weird.”  
“Wow, I can imagine that. You know Alec, the best you can do when facing a situation. Ask yourself how you would react if you were in the other person’s shoes. It usually helps.”  
“Thanks Mom. I’ll talk to Magnus about it all tomorrow. For now, I’d like to spend the first day of the year with you and Dad, and wait for the others to arrive.”  
“I like that plan.”

Alec felt his mom kiss the top of his head and she then placed a hot cup of coffee in front of him. Alec excused himself from the living room and went to make a quick phone call to Magnus. He was sent to voicemail after a few rings.

“Hey Magnus, I hope you made it home ok. Listen, I’m sorry if I came on too hard with the moving in together thing. It was just a spur of the moment thing and I took your answer personally when I probably shouldn’t have, I’m sorry. Would you like to come over tomorrow? I’m not working the next four days, so I’m free whenever you are. Ok, call me back when you can. Bye.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus talk some more about moving in. Logan comes to New York.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> I didn't think I'd manage to publish today, but thanks to the snow, I spent almost my whole weekend inside so I had enough time to finish it!
> 
> This chapter is bit emotional too, nothing bad but still.
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> And thanks to each and every one of you who kudos'd, left a comment or notified my twitter, it's pure writing fuel <3

Alec woke up to his phone ringing. He opened his eyes slowly and saw Magnus’ name shine on his phone. Before he could grab it, it stopped ringing and went to voicemail. Alec didn’t even wait to hear the message and called Magnus back, who answered on the second ring.

“Morning Magnus, sorry, I couldn’t reach my phone in time.”  
“Morning Darling. Did I wake you up?”  
“No?”  
“Oh Alexander I’m so sorry. Go back to sleep, I’ll call you later.”  
“Nonsense, I’m up now. How are you?”  
“I’m ok. You?”  
“Same. Again Magnus, I want to apologize. It truly was just a joke at first, but I don’t know, I guess I got insecure and pushed it out on you. I am really enjoying our relationship.”  
“Me too. That’s why I was calling actually. I’m not working either for the next two days, do you want us to spend those together? I could come at your place?”  
“I’d love that.”  
“Great. Give me an hour, I’ll pack a bag and I’ll be with you.”  
“Perfect, enough time for a coffee and a shower.”

Alec hopped out of bed and went straight for the shower. He was out barely ten minutes later to see that he had another message on his phone, from Logan.

“Hey Alec, happy new year man. Listen, I’ll be in New York for a week starting tomorrow and I was wondering if you’d like to meet up? Anyway, give me call when you can and let me know. Bye.”

Alec sent Logan a quick text, wishing him a happy new year and agreeing to meet in 2 days. They’d finalize the details later. Alec didn’t have time to dwell too much on the invitation as magnus arrived barely a few minutes later.

“Sorry I’m early Darling, but I really wanted to see you.”  
“You’re always welcome here Magnus. You could have come without calling and that’d be fine too.”  
“I’ll keep that in mind. Did you have your breakfast?”  
“Not yet.”  
“Perfect, I brought food.”

Alec watched Magnus enter his apartment and go to the kitchen with the food bags in hand and his brain went back to his discussion with Jace. Could it already be love? And would it be too soon to say it? After the moving in debacle, Alec wondered how much Magnus was ready for. Maybe they needed to have that conversation, despite Alec really not wanting to.

“Everything ok Darling?”  
“Yes, just zoned out. I got a call from Logan, he’s in New York and wants to meet up.”  
“That’s great, isn’t it?”  
“I guess. We haven’t seen each other in a long while now. Usually his parents travel to him because it’s easier, I don’t know why they didn’t this year.”  
“Maybe Logan wanted to see the city again?”  
“Maybe, I don’t know.”  
“So have you set up a date?”  
“The day after tomorrow.”  
“Do you want me to come Darling? As moral support.”  
“Thank you Magnus, but I think I’d rather go on my own.”  
“Oh, ok.”  
“No no, we’re talking about it, no assuming or whatever. I want to see Logan on my own because he might have things he wants to say he won’t be comfortable saying in front of someone he doesn’t know. I wouldn’t mind you meeting him and if we had been going to LA and offered to meet up, then yes, of course, I would like you to meet. But since it’s here and it feels weird, I’d rather go alone. That being said, he’s staying a few days and we could always arrange for another day.”  
“It makes sense. And I’d really like to meet him if you decide for a second date.”  
“We’ll see. For now, I’d like to enjoy you, and only you.”

Alec smirked at Magnus and went closer to him. He slowly placed his hands on Magnus’ waist, leaving enough time to the other to move back should he want to. When Magnus made no move, Alec closed the remaining distance between them and kissed his boyfriend. 

Alec felt Magnus’ hands reach around his neck and softly play with the hair at the nape of his neck. Even though he would never admit it out loud, Alec was glad to be taller. The possibility of pulling Magnus into a bone crushing hug, and being able to shelter him from everything while in his embrace made him feel fantastic.

“So, breakfast and then TV? Or we could go out if you feel like taking a walk or going shopping?”  
“Are you offering to go shopping? Voluntarily?”  
“You love shopping and I… like seeing you happy.”  
“TV sounds good Darling. I don’t really want to go out. I’d much rather spend the days cuddled on your couch.”  
“Then it’s settled, TV marathon.”

The day went by extremely fast, Alec feeling so at ease with Magnus. He knew it was too soon to talk about it again, but Alec would really like for Magnus to live with him. He understood the other man's hesitance and worry, but maybe they could try and talk openly about what scared him, what worried him. Maybe they could find a middle ground at least at first? One thing was certain, Alec wished Magnus to be the one to bring the topic on the table. He obviously didn’t want to make his boyfriend uncomfortable, and if Magnus wasn’t ready, then Alec would wait. 

When it was time for bed, Alec took Magnus’ hand in his and led him to his bedroom. Once inside, he kissed Magnus’ neck, delicately, until Magnus moved his head so Alec could deepen his exploration. They moved towards the bed and once on it, Alec felt Magnus put his hands on Alec's chest and push Alec back a little.

“Darling, I would really like for us to talk before we…”  
“Oh.”  
“Don’t oh me, Alexander. You know as well as I do that we need to talk things out. I thank you for giving me time to come to you, but I think we really need to have everything out in the open. You were so brave when we talked about your scars, I owe you at least that.”  
“You don’t owe me anything Magnus. I would love to talk with you about what bothered you. I want to do anything I can to understand and help you feel comfortable.”  
“I told you that I never lived with anyone. And I also told you that I never trusted anyone enough before to just imagine reaching that point. My life has never been easy, nor stable. When I met the Garroways, things got better, but I already was old enough. I worry that if we move too fast, we might just crash and burn. I’m having the best time with you Alexander. I am in awe of what you’ve shared with me and the person you are. And I truly want to be ready to take that step. I just fear that… ok, what happens if we decide after a few weeks that it’s not working? What if you hate the habits I have and you don’t know yet. What if I can’t stand your snoring or the food you eat?”  
“Hey, I don’t snore.”  
“Keep telling yourself that Darling. For now, it’s endearing because it’s new and everything.”  
“Magnus, I get it. We don’t have to move in together right now. It honestly just crossed my mind when we were in that kitchen. I would love to have you here with me all the time, because I… I think we get along really well and it would be nice to go farther down the road together. But again, no pressure. I totally get it. It’s a huge step for me too.”  
“We could try for a middle ground?”  
“What do you have in mind?”  
“Each time we have a day off, we can spend the night either here or at my place. Getting used to sharing every day life moments together?”  
“I love the idea. Do you want to start now?”  
“I might have packed enough to stay the next two days.”  
“Thank you Magnus.”  
“Why are you thanking me Darling?”  
“For giving it a try.” 

“Are you sure you’ll be ok going on your own Darling?”  
“I truly am. It’s not going to be easy but… Magnus, would you mind being here when I come back? If you want, you can stay here when I’m gone, I don’t mind.”  
“I could make us some dinner for tonight?”  
“Oh then definitely stay here while I’m gone. I might not have everything you need stocked though. But…”  
“What is it Alexander?”  
“I could give you a spare key? So you can come and go as you wish?”

Alec watched Magnus’ reactions carefully, hoping he hadn’t gone too far with his offer. After a few seconds, Magnus smiled at him and nodded.

“Sure, it seems like a good idea. I can go to the market and then come back and prepare dinner.”  
“Give me a sec, I’ll go take it, it’s in my bedroom.”

Alec went to grab the key and once he went back to the living room, he decided he would try and push his luck some more.

“Here is it.”  
“Thank you Darling. I’ll give it back tonight.”  
“What if you don’t? Hear me out. I’m not saying move in right now. But I would love it if you had a key to my place. That way you can come whenever you feel like coming. And before you get to thinking too much about what it means, it doesn’t have to mean anything. Iz and Jace both have a key to my place. They still knock when they come over and you could remain on that safe side too. But I’d like for you to be able to come here whenever you want to. Think about it while I’m gone ok?”  
“I will. Think about it that is. Thank you, Alexander.”

Alec left feeling light and happy. It was a good first step. It didn’t have to mean more than just that: having the key to his place. He hoped Magnus would see it that way too and keep the key.

Alec had agreed to meet Logan at his parents’, which seemed the easiest way to do it. At least everything would allow Logan to feel at ease and comfortable. When he knocked on the door, Alec felt something in his stomach, and not the good kind of fluttering butterflies, but more the uncomfortable kind. The door opened and Logan’s mom looked at Alec, a warm smile on her face.

“Alec, come on in. It’s been so long. You look well.”  
“Thanks Lauren. You look good too. How are you?”  
“Good, good. John is out on business, I’m glad Logan is here to keep me company. What about you, how are your parents?”  
“Good, thanks. They’re upstate at the moment.”  
“Logan is in the living room, you remember where that is?”  
“I do. Thanks Lauren.”  
“No worries. I’ll leave you two, I’m sure you have many things to discuss. Don’t be a stranger Alec, ok?”

Alec only nodded because no word could come. Lauren had always been a nice woman, caring for Alec and kind with him. It still came as a shock that with everything that had happened, she didn’t blame him. Or at least she didn’t show it. Alec entered the living and found Logan on the couch, reading.

“Hey Logan.”  
“Alec! I thought I heard my mom talking, but sometimes she talks to herself so…”  
“My mom does that too sometimes.”  
“So, how are things with you?”  
“Hm pretty good actually.”  
“I’m glad to hear that.”

They spent hours talking, Alec telling Logan about Magnus and how things had changed between them and how happy he was. Logan had some news to share too, having met a wonderful woman who he had been seeing for the last year. They planned on living together at some point. Alec was truly happy for his friend, but despite everything, things had changed. They lived on opposite sides on the country, and no matter how much they tried, the memory of their past would always haunt them. And as usual, Logan was the first to broach the subject.

“Do you think we’re trying to cling onto something that’s not there anymore?”  
“I think we’re still friends, but our lives are in different places now. But you’re my best friend.”  
“I was your best friend Alec. I think I stopped being your best friend that night. Sure, it’s still super easy to talk to each other and we have great memories, but I hate seeing the remorse on your face when you see me. I don’t blame you Alec.”  
“I know you don’t, and I’m really thankful for that. But I guess you’re right. We don’t really have anything in common anymore, aside from that painful memory.”  
“So Alec Lightwood, are we breaking up?”  
“I guess we are…”  
“Hey, don’t look so gloom. It was bound to happen at some point. I’m glad we managed to remain friends for as long as we did. And I’m glad you’ve found Magnus.”  
“I’m glad you found Rebecca. You look happier and this is everything I could hope for. We stay in touch, every once in a while?”  
“We can try. But Alec, honestly, I understand the need to move on. I’m a reminder, as much as you are to me. Maybe it’s best if we make a clean break.”  
“Ok, yeah, sure.”  
“Hey, don’t get all emotional on me Lightwood.”  
“Fuck off.”  
“Now that’s better. On a more serious note Alec, don’t hold back with Magnus. Tell him you love him.”  
“How do you know I do?”  
“Because I know you man. And I’m sure you’re scared shitless about telling him, but remember that life is short. And it’s best to know soon if something’s not gonna work. No need to waste time. And from what you’ve told me, I’m sure it’s all going to be just fine.”  
“I’ll miss you Logan.”  
“I’ll miss you too Alec. I am truly thankful for our friendship.”  
“Me too.”

Alec left Logan’s house, his heart a bit heavy. He understood and agreed with what Logan had told him, but Logan was also his last anchor to Will. With Logan gone, then the page would definitely be turned.

That’s why it made sense. Because the page turned to welcome a new chapter. Which didn’t mean the beginning of the story was forgotten. Just that this new chapter would focus on different characters. Alec entered his apartment and was welcomed by the smell of vegetables being cooked. He found Magnus in the kitchen, humming while cooking. The humming stopped as soon as Magnus turned around.

“Is everything alright Darling?”  
“Yes. No. I don’t know.”  
“What happened? Is Logan ok?”  
“He is. He’s happy and living a wonderful life in LA.”  
“That’s great, isn’t it?”  
“It is. I’m so glad for him. He just…”

Alec felt the tears coming and tried to stop them but to no use. He felt Magnus move in the kitchen, until his arms circled Alec. The tears were silent, but Alec needed the support. He needed to have Magnus there with him. When they had finally stopped, Alec lifted his head.

“I’m sorry Magnus.”  
“You have nothing to apologize for Alexander. If you want to tell me what happened, I’ll listen. If you just want to digest everything first, I’m fine too. Whatever you need Darling, I’m there.”  
“Logan told me it would probably be best if we stopped talking to each other. We’re too much of a reminder of what happened all those years ago. We’ve stuck together because it was easy and comfortable. But I am a reminder of what he’s lost as much as he is to me. So we’ve decided to have a clean, mutually agreed break. And I know I didn’t see him as much as I used to, but he was my best friend. It’s going to be hard to just, not reach out... I'm glad you're here tonight Magnus, thank you.”  
“You’re welcome Darling. Would you want to take a nap before dinner?”  
“It might be a good idea. Would you mind coming with me?”  
“Are you sure? I can stay in the living room with a book. I don’t mind.”  
“If you don’t mind, I’d really like it if you’d hold me?”  
“Let’s go Darling. Give me a minute to turn everything off in the kitchen and I’ll join you.”

Alec went to his bedroom and got ready. He climbed into bed and welcomed the warmth. Magnus joined him just a few minutes later. He got in next to Alec, who shuffled as close as he could. He let his head rest on Magnus’ chest, while Magnus played with his hair. They stayed silent for a little while, Alec enjoying Magnus’ ministrations in his hair, slowly drifting to sleep. 

Remembering Logan’s word, Alec turned his head to look at Magnus, who was watching him with a worried look.

“Magnus, there’s something I need to tell you.”  
“Talk to me Darling.”  
“Logan reminded me how short life was. And he is right. I don’t see the point of wasting time when I know how it can be taken away. You’ve changed my life Magnus. I am so much happier now that you are in it. Before, everything was just bearable, now things are enjoyable. I don’t dread days like I used to. I can sleep without being awaken by nightmares all the time. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I love you Magnus Bane. And it’s fine if you’re not there yet. But I needed you to know. I’m serious about you. I love you.”

Alec had kept his eyes on Magnus while talking to him, wishing for Magnus to see with his eyes that every word that left Alec’s mouth came from his very soul. Alec felt Magnus’ hand come rest on his cheek and slowly his lips closed on Alec’s. The kiss was soft, but so full of adoration.

“How can you imagine for a second that I don’t love you back? Of course I love you too Alexander. I am truly honored to be able to offer you more than comfort and help you see more to life. You’ve changed my life too. You’ve made me long for a family when I always assumed I’d be on my own for as long as I’d live. You are so brave and so kind. I love you too Alexander, I think I have for a while now, but I was too scared to admit it out loud.”

Alec just hugged Magnus to his side and both men remained in each other’s embrace before slowly drifting to sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Visiting the Hamptons - part one. Magnus and Alec make plans to go visit Alec's parents over a weekend. Serious topics are brought up along the preparations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> I finally managed to finish this one, I wanted it to be the full Hampton stay but I realized how long the chapter already was and wanted to publish something before the weekend, since I'll be celebrating my son's 14th birthday :)
> 
> Anyway, I hope you'll like this one, we delve a little more into Alec's life. And Maryse is back, yay!
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> Thanks for the comments, kudos and discussions. Thanks also for your patience in between chapters, life is hectic right now!
> 
> Let's go!

“Morning Darling.”  
“Morning Love.”  
“Hmmm that’s new.”  
“It is. But it suits you.”  
“I love you.”  
“I love you too.”  
“I’m glad I decided to take today off.”  
“Ditto.”

Alec leaned in and kissed Magnus softly, just relishing in the feel of his boyfriend against him. Their decision to spend their days off together was a good one if Alec had anything to say about it. He was truly happy Magnus had agreed to this middle ground, and in a way, it made more sense. Sure, they had been dating for a few months but still, they didn’t really know each other’s habits or more accurately the bad ones. By sharing those days here and there, then they would be confronted to everyday situations outside of the usual sunshine and rainbows they got from dates. 

“By the way, I’ve thought about it a lot last night, and if you’re still ok with it, I’d like to keep your spare key with me. I will still knock, just like your siblings, but I like knowing I have a way to get to you should you need me.”  
“Really?”  
“Really. Thank you for understanding and being respectful of my choice, I truly appreciate it.”  
“Magnus, how could I not? I love you, your happiness is more important than my own, because seeing you happy makes me happy. If you’re not ready, then you’re not ready. I let my pride get the best of me the other day, that was stupid.”  
“It wasn’t stupid. I guess I can see your point in a way. And I think our middle ground is a good step. And we can move forward once this one doesn’t feel enough anymore?”  
“Perfect.”

At that moment, Alec knew he had made the right decision when he had offered his key to Magnus. They remained in bed for a few hours, until Alec’s phone made itself known. Thankfully it wasn’t work, but his parents, asking if he’d like to come for a weekend in 2 weeks.

“Magnus?”  
“Yes Darling?”  
“Are you free two weekends from now?”  
“I think I’m working on Friday night, but I could always switch my shift. Why are you asking?”  
“My parents will be in the Hamptons then and they asked if I’d like to go visit. And I was wondering if you’d like to come with?”  
“Are you sure they wouldn’t mind if I tag along?”  
“My parents like you Magnus. I’m sure they wouldn’t. But I could call my mom and ask if you’d prefer.”  
“Yes, I’d definitely be more comfortable.”

Alec just grabbed his phone and dialed his mother’s number.

“I didn’t mean now Alexander!”  
“Hi Mom!”

Alec laughed as Magnus hid his face under the covers.

“I’m good thanks. You too?... Yes perfect… Listen, I got your text, would it be ok if Magnus came with me?... Great, so count us in… love you too Mom. Bye.”

Alec hung up and turned towards Magnus.

“Are you done hiding? Did you hear my mom?”  
“I did. Thank you. But you could have waited. Imagine your face if she had said no!”  
“Then you would have heard me ask why and then probably open a can of worms.”  
“Though, I have to tell you it’s kind of going against my plan.”  
“Which plan?”  
“I didn’t want to tell you just now, but Clary has been working on a drawing for me, for a new tattoo. But of course, if we go to the beach in two weeks, I’ll have to wait until we come back to have it done. I’m not taking any risk.”  
“New tattoo?”  
“I knew that would pick up your interest…”  
“Come on Magnus, you have to tell me more, you can’t leave me hanging like that.”  
“The one you did for me was my way of turning the page and getting ready for the next one. It was great and exactly what I needed. But now, I want something else. I want an opening. I could show you the first designs Clary did?”  
“Sure, I’d love that. Are you planning on getting some color? Or just black?”  
“I think I will do black again.”  
“Show me.”

Magnus grabbed his phone and showed Alec the first drafts Clary had made. The tattoo wasn’t that big but the pattern was intricate, the motion in it clear, making it obvious this was going forward.

“I love it Magnus. I would probably change a thing or two because inking is different to drawing but the idea is great.”  
“Please, if you want to work from this one, this is her last draft. I would love to see how you can change it. Clary might be family but I guess in a way you know better where I wanna go with this one. And of course I want you to tattoo it on me.”  
“I would love to. Give me a few weeks? I’ll show you the various steps ok?”  
“Perfect.”  
“Funny, I thought of adding some more ink on myself too.”  
“Really?”  
“Yes. I had many done after the accident and after being back to working. But it’s been a while and I feel like I have a new story to tell.”  
“Will you show me before getting it done?”  
“I will. Iz is probably going to do it. I need someone a little more delicate than Jace for it.”  
“You already have an idea?”  
“I do. I’ve been wanting to add some work on my calves, since only my thighs are covered for now. At first, I only tattooed my legs because of the scars, but I’d like to have some ink there that’s not a reminder of it. Just my way of knowing that there’s more out there.”  
“I think it’s a beautiful idea Darling.”

Since they had planned on going to the Lightwoods, both men had to work more shifts to cover for the days they would be out, so they barely had time to see each other. A phone call here and there and soon enough, it was Thursday evening. They had agreed on taking the road early on Friday morning, so Magnus came to sleep at Alec’s place the night before. 

“Magnus, did you really have to bring two bags? We’re going for three days.”  
“I know, I know. But I wanted to be prepared for any occasion. I always overpack, it’s a habit.”  
“I don’t know what my parents have planned, usually we spend a lot of time at home, since we have a nice view and everything.”  
“Makes sense. I would avoid the crowd too if I had a place where I could enjoy the beauty in private.”  
“I was thinking of taking my camera with me.”

Alec had spoken in a very low voice, not certain that he wanted Magnus to hear. But considering the way his boyfriend’s head turned in his direction, Alec knew Magnus had heard him.

“I didn’t know you still had it.”  
“It’s in one of the boxes in my room. I could never bring myself to sell it. I should probably check that everything is still working though, because it’s been a while.”  
“Can I ask you something that you can totally ignore?”  
“Always Magnus. And I will never ignore it, I might not answer exactly like you’d like but I will always answer honestly.”  
“Why don’t you consider buying a new one? I understand that this one is sentimental, but hasn’t technology changed to much that you would get better results with a more recent one?”  
“That’s highly possible. It’s true that it’s been a while so… Do you mind if I go check right? I know where it is and we could take a look at it, maybe get some shots tonight?”  
“Would you like us to go talk a walk in the park? The colors are not the prettiest right now but you could probably still find some interesting things to take pictures of?”  
“Sure. Give me a minute and I’ll come back with everything.”

Alec left to pick up his equipment. He knew exactly where everything was, so he joined Magnus in the living room barely five minutes later. They opened the box and Alec chuckled.

“What is it?”  
“I can’t believe I thought it would be fine to go take pictures with this. I haven’t followed photography as I used to lately, but let’s face it, the resolution on this will not allow for the best shots. It’s fine, it was just an idea anyway.”  
“Darling, why don’t we go out anyway and find you a camera? There must be shops for this around.”  
“I don’t know Magnus. I might not use again after the weekend, I might even not be able to use it this weekend.”  
“So? You’ll have it ready to go for when you decide you want to get back into it. I think it’s a great idea Alexander. You’re talented, but most importantly, you love taking pictures. Anyone can see it when looking at your pictures. Come on, let’s go before everything closes.”

Alec let Magnus grab his hand and they got ready. Maybe getting a new camera wasn’t such a bad idea. He could always take pictures of Magnus, it would be worth it.

Once in the shop, Alec went straight to his favorite brand and started looking at the different models. Magnus was still outside on his phone with the restaurant, so Alec had decided to get a first look on his own. He was also positive that Magnus wouldn’t be of help on how to choose a camera.

“Hi there, can I help you?”  
“Hi, yes possibly. I’m looking to replace my former camera. I used to be a professional photographer but stopped somewhere around 10 years ago.”  
“Wow, I understand why you’d need some new equipment. Ok, what kind of pictures are we talking about?”  
“Mainly wildlife and nature. Some portraits but mostly outdoors anyway.”  
“Oh those are my favorites. And you’re decided on a brand?”  
“Well, all my cameras have always been from this one, so I’d like to stick to it. I’ve found that even when changes happened to various models, the main things remained the same so I’m sure I’d be more comfortable with it to start again.”  
“It makes a lot of sense, you seem like a serious and considerate guy, which is not something very common nowadays. And I think it’s great that you’ve decided to get back to it. What made you decide to do it?”

Alec couldn’t. be positive about it, but he was almost certain the young woman was flirting with him. He would normally have skipped answering and just shrugged his shoulders and asked for more information but he decided to make it clear, just in case.

“My boyfriend. He saw some of my former pictures and since we’re going away together this weekend, we thought it would be great to use this opportunity.”

And just like that, his assumption was confirmed when her shoulders slumped a bit and she lost a bit of her smile.

“Oh ok. Well, I’m sure the one you’re looking at will be perfect. It has a lot of functions specific for the outdoor and nighttime, if it’s something you like doing too?”  
“I never really tried my hand at that, but it might be a good idea to start.”  
“Great. I’m sure most of the lenses you have can still be used on this one, they haven’t changed the mechanism, so I think with just the camera, you’ll be good.”

Alec smiled at her and nodded, he lifted his head and saw Magnus coming their way.

“So Darling, have you found what you were looking for?”  
“I guess I did. Lindsey here was kind enough to help me.”  
“I didn’t really help, you already had the good one in hand, but thanks.”  
“You did, I would have spent hours looking at specifications.”  
“Glad I could help then. Enjoy your weekend and I hope you’ll have fun with the camera.”

Alec could see the questioning looks Magnus was sending him, but he shook his head and went to pay. Once outside, he felt Magnus tug on his sleeve.

“Darling, tell me. What happened? Did you dazzle poor Lindsey?”  
“I think she was flirting with me.”

Alec heard Magnus chuckle next to him.

“It’s not funny Magnus.”  
“It is Darling. You’ve never been flirted with?”  
“No, not really. Or I just never realized it.”  
“You’re too cute for your own good. I’m sure many tried to get your attention, you just never paid attention.”  
“Maybe. I don’t really care anyway, I’ve got you now.”  
“That you do my love. So, do you want to go and try it out in the park?”  
“I’m not sure there will be enough battery in it. Better go home and charge it and we’ll try it over the weekend.”  
“As you wish.”  
“Thank you Magnus. For pushing me and coming with me tonight.”  
“You’re welcome Darling. I can’t wait to see you in action.”  
“Can we, maybe, not tell my parents? I’m not sure if I’ll do it so I’d prefer to keep them in the dark about it at first.”  
“Sure we can. Though Darling, I’m sure your parents will be supportive whatever your decision might be. But it can be our secret if you’d prefer.”  
“Yes, I think it’s best at first.”

They went back to Alec’s apartment and prepared everything for their weekend. Despite his calm exterior, Alec was a bit nervous about spending a whole weekend with his parents and Magnus. He had never really done that type of things before. With Will, they had lived abroad most of the time and even if his parents knew him well, they didn’t have that many occasions to spend days together for more than a few hours here and there.

He had no doubt that his parents would love Magnus. And he was certain they would have a fantastic weekend together, but the domesticity of it all made him wary. The last time domesticity had been brought up, it had led to their worst fight. 

“What’s gotten you all silent Darling?”  
“Nothing much. I just hope we’ll have a nice time.”  
“I’m sure we will. Your parents are lovely, we’ll be talking and probably taking walks. It will be a nice weekend. You’re not regretting inviting me, are you?”  
“No my love, no. I… it’s stupid, I never really went on a weekend with my parents and my boyfriend. So I don’t know what to expect and I don’t want you to feel bad or obligated to do some things. If at some point, we get too much and you need a break, it’s fine if you want a time out or whatever. The house is big enough if you want some privacy.”  
“Alexander, the goal of a weekend away with your family is to spend time with you and your family. Talk to me Darling. What’s really bothering you?”  
“Well, last time something domestic happened wasn’t one of our best moments. I worry I might say something stupid again and that it’ll blow out of proportion.”  
“Ok, I think we need to establish a rule: you can say whatever you want, and I will listen. In exchange, I ask that you allow me the same treatment. We need to be able to talk about everything, and it will probably mean talking about things that are not easy to discuss. Maybe we should install a “talk it out” rule. And if things get too heated, then we take a time out but we head back into it when we’ve calmed down and we address the issue once and for all. What do you think?”  
“Yes, I think it could be good. I know I tend to overthink and sometimes get lost in my own insecurities. And I agree, dialogue is important, and I want you to be able to tell me anything. So yes, definitely yes.”  
“Perfect then! Are you fine with turning in? the time of the alarm is scaring me. I need my beauty sleep.”  
“Somehow, I doubt that any sleepless night would make you any less beautiful my love.”

Alec was almost positive a faint blush tainted Magnus’ cheeks. They spent the night in each other arms, until the alarm woke them up at the ungodly hour of 5am.

They took the road at 6am and made a first stop for large coffees to go. The drive wasn’t that long but they’d both need the energy during the day. Alec had told Magnus many times that they could always take a nap but it hadn’t seemed to be a great option for him. 

Alec hadn’t given a second thought to taking the car. But they had only been gone for thirty minutes that he started feeling short of breath. He had taken a car after the accident, but never with someone else in. And he had just realized that Magnus was next to him and that he was responsible for him.

“Alexander, are you ok?”

Of course, Magnus realized something was off a few minutes after Alec had realized it himself.

“I am. It’s the first time I’m taking the car with someone since…”  
“Oh Darling, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think of it. Do you want me to drive?”  
“No I think it’s best if I drive?”  
“Are you asking? Because, as of now, I’m not scared by your driving. So I’m really ok with you driving as long as you are. If you’d rather sleep while I drive, I don’t mind.”  
“When the accident happened, I was in the backseat. I didn’t see much. I think driving gives me a sense of being in control, no matter how false that is. Will was an excellent driver and he couldn’t prevent it. So I’m sure if I had been the one driving, it would have been the same. But I still think I’ll be more comfortable that way. But maybe at some point, if I get tired, we can switch?”  
“Sure. Just let me know and I can take the wheel.”  
“Distract me?”  
“Did I ever tell you about the time I got banned from Peru?”  
“You got banned from where?”  
“Peru, Darling. The country?”  
“I know what Peru is. I was surprised you got banned form a country. How did that happen?”  
“Let me tell you a story then…”

They spent the drive casually talking about everything, Magnus entertaining him. They arrived barely three hours after leaving. 

“Thank you, my love. It helped, a lot. And I learned so many things I didn’t know.”  
“Well, now, don’t go and repeat those things to your parents. I want them to still like me at the end of the weekend.”

Alec just chuckled at that. They got out of the car, took their bags and to the door. They hadn’t had time to knock when Maryse opened, a huge smile on her face.

“My boys!”  
“Hi Mom.”  
“Hi Maryse.”  
“Come on in, come on in. I know the sun is out but it’s still rather cold. Alec, we’ve prepared you the room on the top floor, you’ll have more room than in your regular one.”  
“You didn’t have to Mom, we would have been fine in my room.”  
“Nonsense. We never use this one, it was nice to finally have to prepare it. Your Dad is out, he went to the market, he should be back in a few. Until then, you can go upstairs and rest a little if you’d like. Magnus, was the drive up here ok?”  
“It was Maryse. Alexander is a very careful driver and traffic wasn’t that bad.”

Alec saw his mother’s eyes widen at Magnus’ answer. She knew Alec had refused to drive a car with anyone else in it since the accident. Slowly, he saw her face relax and small smile take place on her face. She went to Alec and hugged him.

“I’m so proud of you, Alec.”  
“Thanks Mom.”  
“You’re ok?”  
“I am. Magnus helped, a lot.”  
“I’m glad.”

She let go of Alec and turned to face them both.

“So definitely boys, go get some rest, we’ll have lunch in something like two hours.”

Alec nodded, and took Magnus to the third floor. The room was beautiful, Alec had always loved it because it was filled with books and pictures. But it had once belonged to Maryse’s parents and the family had never used this bedroom for themselves to sleep in. 

“Darling, I was thinking a nap would do you good? Your mom said we had around two hours, you could just close your eyes for a few minutes.”  
“But I want to spend time with you.”  
“Are you whining?”  
“So what if I am? I woke up early and I want to cuddle with my boyfriend. Come here boyfriend.”

Alec grabbed Magnus by the hand and made them stumble on the bed. He turned on his side and shifted back to be as close to Magnus as he could, his back plastered against Magnus’ front. He made Magnus’ hand slither around his midsection and settled comfortably against his boyfriend, a small noise of contentment escaping him.

“I guess we can cuddle for a few minutes.”  
“I love it when I’m hidden in your arms. I feel safe. I feel loved.”  
“You are Darling. You’re safe, loved and cherished.”

Alec felt Magnus run his hand along his arm and it took barely a few minutes for him to drift into sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Weekend with Alec's family. Lots of work to do. Valentine's Day in the middle of it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> I seem to be almost done with this story, I think one or two chapters remaining, not much more. I need them to go over some issues first and then, I'll let them be happy ever after (it's not really a spoiler, you knew this was where I was going).
> 
> I'm sorry I've been so long to post this, life happened.
> 
> Thanks to everyone who left judos, commented or helped me in any way to continue writing.

Alec opened his eyes to find Magnus watching him.

“Are you watching me sleep again?”  
“I don’t see why I shouldn’t. You look even more breathtaking when you’re sleeping.”  
“Sweet talker. Come here, you’re too far.”  
“Alexander, I’d have to be on top of you to be closer.”  
“I fail to see your point my Love?”

Alec heard Magnus chuckle and he pulled his boyfriend on top of him.

“There, now you’re close enough.”

As his lips made their way on Magnus’ collarbone, Alec reveled in the sense of peace he was feeling. He spent a few minutes trailing his hands up and down Magnus’ back, until he broke his kisses.

“We probably should get out of here. I’m sure my dad is back.”  
“We should. Can I get a few more minutes of this before?”

After a quick fix up, Magnus and Alec went back downstairs, to find Robert and Maryse cooking in the kitchen, dancing around with music in the background.

“Hi Dad.”  
“Alec, Magnus, hi! Feeling better? Your mom told me you drove Alec, no problem on the road?”  
“Everything went fine Dad.”  
“Glad to hear that. Lunch is about to be ready, why don’t you and Magnus go set the table while Maryse and I finish preparing?”

Once everyone was seated, Alec could feel his nervousness coming back. He and his parents talked about everything, and he hoped Magnus wouldn’t feel uncomfortable about it.

“I imagine you have planned things Alec? Where do you want to take Magnus while you’re here?”  
“I haven’t really given it that much thought. Do you have plans?”  
“Not really, but you know your mother and I come here to relax, mostly. So staying in, near the fireplace, taking strolls on the beach, and we’re happy.”  
“I thought maybe we could take walks around the place, we have nice paths here.”  
“We do. Magnus, are you familiar with the area?”  
“Not at all. I can’t wait for Alexander to show me around.”

Alec smiled, and despite his original idea, decided to tell his parents about his plans for the weekend.

“We went and bought a camera last evening.”  
“Alec?”  
“I know Mom. It was a spur of the moment decision, but I’m quite happy about it. I don’t know if I’ll be any good but I want to give it a try. It’s been so long, I miss it.”  
“I think it’s a beautiful idea son. You were always talented with a camera in your hand.”  
“I don’t know if I still am, but I want to.”  
“I’m glad. Let’s get to lunch then, so you and magnus can go take a walk and enjoy the last hours of sunlight.”

Lunch was over soon enough, Magnus and Alec being shooed away by the Lightwoods so they could go walk. 

Once outside, Alec grabbed Magnus’ hand and slowly, they both began walking down the way that led to the ocean. Alec loved the views they had from there, the narrow path still getting ready for Spring. 

“Darling, whenever you want to stop to take a picture, you tell me ok? I’m fine stopping every two minutes if you want to stop every two minutes.”  
“Thanks Magnus. I think I’ll take some shots once we’re closer to the water. Do you…”

Alec’s words died in his throat. He wanted Magnus on his pictures, so much. Because as corny as it might sound, Alec showed love through his pictures. That’s why he had so many nature shots, because he had found something extremely specific about those places that made him feel at peace. That’s also why he didn’t have staged pictures, of anyone. Capturing the moment felt so much more, so true to the subject he’d take pictures of. 

He had pictures of Isabelle, her head thrown back while laughing; of his mother scolding Jace after another mistake; of his parents just looking at each other, their love written plainly on their faces. He also had a few pictures of Will, taken when the other man wasn’t looking. And now he longed for pictures of Magnus. 

They neared the water and Alec stopped, taking in the view. 

“Darling, I’d like to go just put my feet in the water, is that ok?”  
“Sure, but I’m staying here. It must be freezing, I’m not going anywhere near it!”  
“As you wish.”

Alec watched Magnus leave and get closer to the water. He bent down a little to touch it with his fingers and then went to remove his shoes and socks. He lifted his pants a little so they wouldn’t get wet. Alec had watched him like a hawk the whole time and as soon as Magnus had his back to him, he had grabbed his camera.

The first picture he took was of Magnus standing in front of the ocean, facing the immensity of it. He followed him from afar, his eyes locked on the camera. The realization that Magnus was out of the water and next to him again came when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry my Love, I got distracted.”  
“Don’t apologize, I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself. Could I take a look at those once we’re home?”  
“Sure. I need to edit most of them, but I have a few ones I’m really happy about.” 

The continued their stroll on the path, Alec stopping a few times to take shots of various things. He could feel Magnus observing him, or more looking out for him, like he were expecting for something to happen.

“I’m glad we went and bought the camera.  
“I think it as a wise choice indeed Darling. You seem to be enjoying yourself.”  
“I am. But I think it’s best if tomorrow we just go out you and I, without the camera. I know I can get lost in it and I would rather spend my time with you. I’ll have time for more pictures.”  
“As you wish. But know that I don’t mind. It’s actually quite enjoyable to appreciate you in your natural habitat.”  
“Stop talking about me like a protected species or something.”

Both men laughed and went back to the Lightwoods’. The house was empty when they arrived, but Alec noticed his parents had left a note saying they’d be back later. 

After a nice hot, and shared, shower, both men made their way to the living room and cuddled on the couch. 

“So, how are you liking the Hamptons so far?”  
“Not too bad. The weather’s good, the company is delightful. I’ll probably leave a 5-star review.”  
“Smartass.”  
“Maybe, but you love me anyway.”  
“I do.”

The remaining of the weekend was spent relaxing, Magnus and Alec joining Alec’s parents whenever they were in the house, and Magnus felt at ease discovering this family side of Alec.

Magnus offered to drive on the way back home, and Alec agreed easily. The drive was quiet, Alec had a lot on his mind after the weekend. The many memories that taking pictures had brought back were still in his head, and he was finding it hard to let go.

If he were honest, he had missed it more than he would ever admit. The sense of freedom and calm that he experienced when he was out there was something he hadn’t forgotten, not really. He had just put it aside in his brain, possibly to protect himself from any pain.

“I know we said only days off, but would you like staying tonight too?”  
“I’d love to Darling.”

They got back to Alec’s place and got started on making dinner. Alec didn’t realize he had been quiet until Magnus pointed it out.

“Is everything alright Darling?”  
“I’m sorry Magnus, I’m not being a good host tonight.”  
“You’re not a host Darling, you’re the person I’m sharing my life with. And I can tell that something’s bothering you. It’s ok if you don’t want to talk about it, but just know that I’m there if you do.”  
“It’s just… I’ve realized I missed taking pictures more than I thought. And I think I’d like to get back to it. But maybe in a different form? I used to love nature shoots, and I still do, but I was thinking about going into a more urban way. New York is such a beautiful place, but most people only see the touristic ones. I’d like to work on unknown sceneries and people. So yeah, my mind has been pretty busy.”  
“I think it’s a wonderful idea, Alexander.”  
“I’m also glad I took you to visit my parents. I’m delighted you guys got along as well as you did. You know, I had never really spent any amount of time with my parents and my significant other. They knew Will, they had met him several times, we had dinners together, but we never spent a whole few days with them.”  
“They are easy to get along with. They adore you and only want your happiness, so it makes three of us. I need to call your mom during the week by the way, I promised her I’d take her with me to my cosmetic store so she could get some new products.”  
“You know Isabelle is going to be so mad about it? She has been trying to convince my mom to go with her for years, and my mom never agreed.”  
“Really? I hope she didn’t accept just…”  
“I’m gonna stop you right there, Maryse Lightwood never accepts just to something. If she wants to say no, she says no, believe me.”  
“Good to know. Then I guess we’ll have some bonding time. And I’ll apologize to your sister by taking her too on another day.”  
“Are you planning on making all the women in my family fall in love with you?”  
“I have the love of the only member of the family I’m interested in.”  
“That you do my love. That you do.”

Monday morning came and both men went their separate ways to their respective jobs, with a promise of seeing each other soon. Alec arrived in the tattoo shop before everyone, which usually was the case. 

He opened his computer and began looking through the pictures he had taken during the weekend. Even if most weren’t perfect and definitely not of a professional level, they all looked good enough to be considered for drawings. If he had to pick a favorite, he would take the one with Magnus in it, where his boyfriend was looking at the immensity of the ocean, shoulders tension-free and hands in his pocket. He turned this one black and white and loved it even more. Alec went on to grab a white sheet of paper and a pencil and started with the outlines of what was his first drawing from picture in years.

A throat being cleared behind him brought Alec back from his job.

“Hi big brother.”  
“Hey Iz.”  
“What are you working on?”  
“We went to the Hamptons with Magnus, we met up mom and dad there.”  
“Oh, official family time then. How was it?”  
“Good, they got along really well.”  
“That’s nice to hear. What got you so engrossed at barely 10am on a Monday morning?”  
“I hum… I took pictures over the weekend and this one made me want to draw.”

Alec turned his screen so that Isabelle could see which picture he was referring to. Alec could see many emotions cross his sister’s face, but he never expected her to well up.

“Iz, don’t make a big deal out of it.”  
“But it is a big deal Alec. I haven’t seen you draw a picture since the accident. I am so happy for you. So happy you have finally found the desire to take pictures and draw again. Do you plan on it being a hobby or would you like going back to pro?”  
“I don’t want it to be my job anymore, but I’d like to make it a side activity if you will. I had forgotten how much I loved being out and waiting for the perfect moment to press the button. I talked with Magnus about it last night, and told him I’d like to try and work in urban areas now, instead of nature as I used to. Something different.”  
“I think it’s a great idea. What does magnus think?”  
“Same.”

Isabelle smiled at him and crossed the few remaining inches between them and hugged her brother.

“I’m so happy for you Alec. You deserve this. You deserve to be happy and loved. I’m glad Magnus made you realize that.”  
“I hadn’t felt this… complete… in a while. It feels nice.”  
“I’m also glad you’re going back to previous things. Because as much as I love Magnus for bringing you out of your shell, remember you’re valid as a person too. His love made you glow, but you were already shining.”

Alec hugged his sister and watched her leave his office, taking in her words. It was true. Magnus had helped him out of his shell. He had helped him become a new version of himself. But Alec needed to be strong and resilient on his own. Relying on his partner was something Alec needed, but even him realized he needed to be himself before being able to share his life with someone else.

The following weeks flew by, Magnus being super busy with the restaurant, and Alec keeping good on his intentions and traveling through New York to take some photoshoots. Soon enough came Valentine’s Day, and despite Alec hating the holiday, he asked Magnus to come over for the night so they could spend it together.

“I can’t believe I haven’t seen you in two weeks. Ugh, I hate how busy I am. I barely have time outside of work, this new launch is driving me crazy.”  
“I know my love. But it’s fine, we managed to make it work. We have a whole evening and a whole night just the two of us. My mom made us dinner, and now we just have to relax and enjoy the evening.”  
“I’ve missed you Darling.”  
“I’ve missed you too.”  
“So, have you been working on your pictures?”  
“I have. I’ve taken some shots that I think might be worth drawing. I need to take a better look at all this, but same as you I guess, I don’t really have any time outside of work.”  
“It was extremely hard getting back to my empty apartment in the evening. I hadn’t realized how much time I spent here.”  
“It felt weird not having you.”

Alec wanted to say more. He wanted to tell Magnus that it would be so much easier if he just moved in already. But he was respecting Magnus’ pace and letting him in charge of the decision for when he would be ready. 

“You know…”  
“Yes?”  
“No, it’s nothing, nevermind.”  
“Magnus, what is it?”  
“I was wondering… if you still wanted to that is… do you think we could try to spend a few weeks living together? To see how it goes? I’m not saying a full moving in with furniture and big boxes and everything. But just coming back home to each other every night and see where we can go from there?”

Alec had expected many things, but not this. After their last discussion, he was positive that Magnus wouldn’t be ready for a while and he was fine with it. So when he heard those sentences coming out of Magnus’ mouth, he just froze. And of course, Magnus interpreted his silence the wrong way.

“Or not, it’s fine. It was just an idea. Don’t worry about it.”  
“Magnus no. I… you just caught me by surprise. Are you asking me, the person who asked you a few months ago to move in, if I’m ok with this? Because I am. I really am. More than words can express actually.”  
“I think it’s worth trying. Those last two weeks have been the hardest in a long while. And at first, I thought it was just because I was tired but I soon realized it was because I missed you. I missed seeing you, I missed cuddling with you, I missed sex too obviously, but I mostly missed being near you.”  
“Well, you know how I feel about that, and I haven’t changed my mind. You’re welcome here any time. So if you want to try and stay here each and every night, you definitely can. And if at some point you want to get some alone time, then you can go back to your place. Whatever makes you comfortable. Just, if you can, on the nights you want to get back to your place, let me know so I don’t worry?”  
“Of course, but I think I’ll tell you in the morning if I ever decide to stay out the night. I wouldn’t want you to worry.”

And so began their routine. Each night, Magnus would get home to Alec’s apartment. Soon enough, he had a drawer and some space in Alec’s closet to put his stuff. They decided together on the new couch for the living room.

Of course, everything wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows and sometimes they fought, to the point of being angry for a while, but as Alec had told Magnus, he would never go to bed angry with him, because he knew how fast things could change, and he wasn’t risking it. This had been one of the biggest adjustments for Magnus, because it wasn’t always easy to manage and get past whatever they’d been fighting. But Alec knew Magnus understood his point, and even if sometimes, he agreed to let it go more for Alec’s sake than anything, at least they would always get into bed and fall into each other’s arms.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus take a few new steps together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> So we've reached the end of it. I hope you'll be happy with the ending, I know I'm happy with where they are and how they went there.
> 
> I will probably take a break from writing for a little while, I might post a few things here and there, but nothing serious, my head is too busy with personal stuff at the moment.
> 
> I would like thank all of you who commented, left kudos and helped me stay motivated.
> 
> As usual, come talk to me on here or twitter @caronahya
> 
> For the last time, here we go.

Alec came home that night to find Magnus already waiting for him.

“I thought you were working tonight my Love.”  
“I was supposed to. But then I decided I had better things to do. Perks of owning the place and having a terrific sous-chef I guess. Damian was just so happy to have free reigns for the night.”  
“Well, I’m happy you’re here.”

Alec closed the gap between them and kissed Magnus sweetly. Alec had never been one for displays of affection, but Magnus had changed that. Alec found himself often kissing his boyfriend for no other reason than wanting to feel his boyfriend’s lips on his. He would take his hand in the street while they were walking, put his hand on Magnus’ pocket when he was cold. He loved the man with all he had and couldn’t believe he had been so lucky to meet him.

“So, what did you have to do that required you being here tonight? Or maybe you want to go somewhere? I could just change and we can do whatever?”  
“Actually, could we order take out and eat in here? I’d like to talk to you about something.”  
“Sure, pizza sounds good?”

Alec saw magnus nod and went to order. He didn’t know why, but this sudden change of plans made him nervous. Magnus wasn’t one to play hooky for no reason. And he looked tense, like something was bothering him. But those last months, Alec had learned to let Magnus come to him. It would do no good to try and force him out of his shell.

They waited for their food watching television and when the pizzas arrived, Alec turned off the tv.

“Do you want to eat while watching tv?”  
“No, it’s a good thing you turned it off. We need to talk.”  
“I’m listening.”

Alec didn’t have a long dating history, but he knew from everywhere that the words “we need to talk” usually meant business, and more often than not, something not good would come. Despite himself, his posture changed and his breathing fit quicker. Magnus didn’t notice any of it, too absorbed in his own situation.

“Darling, we’ve been living at your place for more than four months now. I haven’t been in my apartment since… I can’t even remember the last time I went there. So I was thinking, maybe…”

Alec watched Magnus struggle with his words. It wasn’t common for Magnus to be hesitant, so Alec decided to help him out.

“Do you want to go back there?”  
“What?”  
“To your place my Love. Would you prefer going back to your apartment?”

Alec watched Magnus’ face, an unreadable expression on his face.

“I told you from the start Magnus. I’m ready for whatever, but if you miss your place, or if you’re not comfortable here, you’re not caged my Love. Your happiness is my only concern.”  
“Alexander Darling, no.”  
“No what?”

Instead of answering, Alec saw Magnus’ shoulder shake, then his whole body, until the sound of laughter could be heard all over the place. It was Alec’s turn to look puzzled. When Magnus calmed down enough, he turned towards Alec and grabbed his hands.

“Only you Darling. Only you would tell me to go back to my place if I want to they day I want to ask you if I can move in here, definitely.”  
“You want to move in with me?”  
“Darling, we’ve been living together for months. I just was too scared to admit it. But then I realized all this, that my apartment doesn’t even feel like my apartment anymore, and that most of my stuff is here anyway. Do I have to remind you that we bought a closet to put my clothes in?”  
“I wanted you to feel comfortable. And I obviously didn’t have enough space to fit all your clothes in my tiny drawers…”  
“You’ve bought a separate cabinet in the bathroom for my make-up and all the products I use.”  
“Again, my bathroom equipment stops at toothbrush, skincare, razor and deodorant. You needed more room than that, so I adjusted.”  
“Darling, are you saying you don’t want me to move in with you?”  
“I’m saying I don’t want to force you.”  
“Do you think you are?”  
“I don’t know.”  
“Alexander Darling, look at me.”

Alec turned his head to look into Magnus’ eyes. He didn’t know where this panicked reaction was coming from. He had been dreaming of Magnus moving in with him for months. And now that his boyfriend was saying he wanted to, Alec was scared to believe it.

“Do you not want me to move in with you? I had the feeling that things were going great with us, but…”  
“Don’t finish that sentence, everything is going perfectly fine. I would love nothing more than for you to move in with me Magnus.”  
“Really?”  
“Really.”

They announced the news to their friends and family over the course of the next week, to be rewarded with always the same answer: “but aren’t you already living together?”.  
The only different reaction came from Maryse, of course it came from her.

“Mom, do you have a minute?”  
“I do sweetheart, what can I do for you?”  
“Magnus is moving in with me.”  
“For real?”  
“Yeah. He stopped his lease this morning. His official address is now my apartment.”  
“I’m so happy for you Alec. How are you feeling?”  
“Honestly?”  
“Would I be interested in anything else?”  
“Haha, no of course not. I don’t know. I’m extremely happy. I can’t believe we’ve gone that far. I love him so much and…”  
“You’re scared.”  
“I am. I’m terrified.”  
“Alec, have you talked to Magnus about it?”  
“I can’t mom. I can’t tell him.”  
“What are you afraid of? He knows your past, he will understand.”  
“How do you know? He could always decide I’m too much work, or that he doesn’t want to just be linked to my past forever.”  
“Alec, do you hear yourself? Does any of this sound like something Magnus would say? The man loves you Alec, all of you, past included. Do I have to remind you that he was the one to suggest you put Will’s picture in your hallway? Your boyfriend walks every day in front of the portrait of the man you were supposed to marry. If this is not a clear profession of love and acceptance, I don’t know what is.”  
“But what if anything happens to him? Mom, I’m not ready to go through that again, I can’t lose him.”

Alec felt the moment tears started to roll down his cheeks. He then felt Maryse engulf him in one of her bear hugs.

“Alexander Gideon Lightwood, you will speak to that man of yours. You will talk to him about your fears. And if you need to, you’ll go see Dr Staggard again. You know, I was waiting for something like this to happen. I was surprised when it didn’t at first. But then I realized. You let Magnus be in charge of everything. And it gave you a feeling of being detached, even if you weren’t. But with Magnus moving in, then it makes everything real, more than it was before. I know it’s hard Alec, and I know you’re scared of getting hurt. But you can’t let your fears control you. You have found a wonderful man, who you love so much and who loves you back the same way. This is your new shot at happiness sweetheart. And believe me Alec, you deserve it. Talk to Magnus, will you?”  
“Thanks mom, I will. I love you.”  
“Love you too. Now shoo, go find your man and talk to him.”

Later that day, Alec waited for Magnus to come back from work.

“Why aren’t you asleep Darling? It’s really late.”  
“It’s fine, I’m not working tomorrow. I really wanted to talk to you. Go shower and we’ll talk after?”  
“You can always come with me. I can multitask and shower while we talk.”  
“Rain check? This is not going to go the way I want to if I join you in the bathroom. And while I’d happily say yes any other night, I really want to have a serious talk.”  
“Fine, I’ll be quick.”

Alec sat on the bed and waited for his boyfriend to join him again. 

“So, you wanted to talk Darling? Anything on your mind?”  
“I went to see my mom today. She says hello by the way, and wants you to call her back because she needs advice with her… I can’t remember but… anyway. So I went to see her and I realized that I am terrified of having you move in with me.”  
“Are you having second thoughts?”  
“Absolutely none. I’m just… I’m sorry.”  
“What are you sorry for Darling?”  
“It’s just, last time I wasn’t even that happy and when it all got ripped off of me, I felt like that world was ending. What happens if I lose you too?”  
“Oh Darling, no.”  
“I’m sorry. I’m sure being compared to your boyfriend’s last relationship isn’t exactly good dating etiquette.”  
“When have we cared about etiquette? Alexander, I’m going to need you to listen to me ok?”  
“Hm.”  
“I can’t promise you that nothing won’t ever happen to me. I can’t promise you that we’ll be happy ever after. But that’s the thing Darling, no one can. And it’s a two-way street. Anything could happen to you. And believe me, I wouldn’t even begin to know how to just be. But irrational fears are just irrational. Worrying about the worst happening won’t prevent it from happening but it won’t make it happen either.”  
“My mom said something like that earlier too.”  
“She’s a smart woman, I’m not surprised. Does my moving in make things more complicated for you Darling? If you’re not ready, you can tell me.”  
“I think…”

Alec could see Magnus was trying to give him some time, but he could also see his boyfriend getting worried by the second.

“Don’t freak out, ok?”  
“Alexander Darling, you know this is the worst thing to say, right?”  
“I know I’m bad at this, but hear me out ok?”  
“Ok.”  
“Once you’re officially moved in with me, there’s nothing stopping me from seeing more. And I know we haven’t really talked about it all, but I want to get married Magnus. I want to have children. And I close my eyes and I imagine those things, it takes all my willpower not to picture you just yet, because you weren’t ready. But now that you are, I don’t know if I’ll have enough willpower to stop. Because I desperately want you to be in all those pictures. Because I want you to be the one joining me at the altar. Because I want you to be the one I split nights with to take care of a newborn. Because I want to spend my whole life loving you, cherishing you and building a family with you.”  
“Alexander…”  
“I know. I know it’s too soon and you’re barely moved in that I’m already almost proposing and asking you to be the father of my child. But that’s exactly why I’m terrified. Because I won’t have any barriers to prevent me from falling even more in love with than I already am.”  
“And what are you afraid of? That I don’t share those feelings?”  
“Yes. That I might be too much, that you will regret moving in with me, that something might happen to you.”  
“But I’m right there with you Darling.”  
“Magnus.”  
“I’m serious Alexander. It’s taking all MY willpower not to propose right here and there just to show you how serious I am.”  
“Magnus, I know…”  
“Stop assuming Alexander. Just because I moved at a different pace than you did doesn’t mean we haven’t reached the same destination. I love you Alexander, more I thought I ever would love anyone. You’ve showed me what it feels like to be loved in return, to be cherished. You’ve welcomed me into your family and I haven’t felt that whole since I can’t even remember when. I had reservations about moving in, because I was worried of what could, might, would happen. I guess I just wasn’t ready to let myself fall freely because I was scared too. But you’ve proved many times that you’ll catch me. I can rely on you. I can be myself with you and never be afraid of it.”  
“My mom suggested I should go see the doctor who helped me after Will, to try and ease all those worries.”  
“What do you think?”  
“I think she might have a point, again. Do you think you could come with me?”  
“If you want me there, then I’ll be there.”

They went to see Dr Staggard the week after. Alec felt the changes after a few sessions, and they decided they didn’t need to continue after a month. Alec had let go of most of his relationship-related anxiety issues, and Magnus and him had had long and thorough conversations about expectations and future together.

On the one-year anniversary of their first meeting, Magnus surprised Alec with plane tickets. They left for a week, and spent it on a secluded hotel, on a secluded island, far from technology and the world.

Alec hadn’t seen any of it coming. He had talked about their anniversary coming up with Magnus, but his boyfriend had told him he’d be overwhelmed with work and that they’d have to wait a little to celebrate. 

On their fourth night on the island, Alec and Magnus ordered room service and ate on their terrace, the ocean a few feet away from them. They went to sleep that night after hours of love declaration, both literally and figuratively. When Alec opened his eyes the following morning, he was disappointed to find the other side of the bed empty. When his eyes adjusted a little better to the warm sun shining in the room, he realized that despite the bed being empty, the pillow was covered with a sheet of paper. 

Alec sat up a little and grabbed it, only to realize that it was a picture of him, fast asleep on the couch in their apartment at home. He turned it around and saw Magnus’ handwriting: “If I’ve learned a thing or two from listening to you talk about picture taking, it’s that you reveal a subject’s true beauty when said subject is completely unaware of being photographed. You are beautiful Darling.”

He went to the terrace, to find Magnus already there, a steaming cup of coffee in hand, his back turned to Alec. Getting closer, Alec realized there was another picture on the table. He didn’t know the place, but it looked magnificent. He turned the picture to be met again with Magnus’ handwriting: “This place is gorgeous, yet it holds nothing to your beauty. But maybe we could make the best of it by having you there in a tux and all of our family surrounding us?”

When Alec lifted his head, he realized that Magnus had put his coffee cup down and dropped on one knee, a small velvet box in hand.

“Magnus, what…”  
“Alexander. This last year, you’ve changed my life for the best. You’ve allowed me to become who I was always meant to be. I can’t imagine spending another day on this earth without you by my side. And I know we still have a lot of things to talk about, and that we have time, but I don’t want that. I want to spend every day I have on this earth loving you. I want to carry your name. I want to have a family with you. I want to make you happy. I want you to be my everything. So Alexander Gideon Lightwood, will you marry me?”  
“Yes. A thousand times yes. Magnus, you have no idea how much I love you. I want all of that too.”

They got engaged just the two of them, secretly and they kept the news to themselves. They just waited for someone to see the rings on their fingers. Because if Magnus was used to wearing jewelry, Alec had always had bare hands. It took a total of three weeks. Or to be more accurate, it took a dinner at the Lightwoods’ and their first meeting with Maryse after coming back. It was the first night the whole family had managed to gather together. And despite working with his siblings every day for three weeks and them not seeing anything, it took Maryse Lightwoods approximately two minutes to see the ring. She smiled at Alec, stood up and went to hug him into a bone-crushing embrace.

Alec saw Magnus smile at his mother’s reaction, and the whole family exulted in joy when they realized what had happened. 

Alec and Magnus got married a year later, in a small ceremony on the island of their engagement. 

They welcomed Amy a few months later, and then Samuel.

Their road was met with a few bumps here and there, but their love for each other made the way worth traveling through.


End file.
